Our Hearts Are Wrong, an once upon a time fanfic

She couldn't get a handle on which emotion she was dealing with most at this very moment. She was angry that's for sure, everyone knew, but she sad, scared and so many other things too. To be honest she also frustrated that she was letting herself "feel" at all. Damn him, she was good until NY. Sure there was the whole "finding your parents, magic, constant danger" thing, but for the most part she had made that… manageable. But Neal coming back into her life? How was she going to manage that? They were going to have to deal with each other, if nothing less than for Henry.

She wasn't surprised they had bonded so fast, she had always seen so much of Neal in Henry. She just denied it as much as possible until she saw them together back in Manhattan. That made the barrage of feelings she was dealing with right now so much more real. Henry was the only thing that mattered to her, sure Snow and Charming too - but they had each other, what was going to happen now? Was Neal going to try to take Henry away from her? No, he wouldn't do that on purpose. Henry on the other hand… She could still see the hurt and anger in his eyes when he looked at her. She hated that she had caused Henry any sort of pain, but she hated that he had compared her to Regina… How did they get here? No matter how much she didn't want to she was going to have to talk to Neal to figure out where to go from here, she just had to push the feelings down enough until this conversation was over. She just needed more time to figure out how to deal with them.

She knocked on the door of his room at the in and held her breath. But when he opened it up… There they were just staring right at her. All the feelings she just told herself she would shove down couldn't stay away when she looked into his eyes. Damnit. She was stronger than this. She wasn't a go weak at the knees, damsel in distress kind of woman - this had to stop. She looked down and walked right past him into the room.

"We need to talk" Emma said quickly. "Hello to you too" Neal said as he shook his head. She kept her eyes from looking at him by surveying the room as she spoke to Neal

"I just want to make sure we're on the same page. Henry wants you here and I know you want to spend time with him so I am not going to get in the way of that." "Why do I feel that there is a but coming?" asked Neal. For the first time since he opened the door she stared right at him and desperately hoped that the steely gaze she was trying to project was hiding her true jumble of emotions within "It's not a but, you just need to know that if you hurt him in ANY way, that's it you're gone." she said coldly. "Is that what you think I am going to do?" Neal asked angrily. Wait, how was HE getting angry? They weren't the ones who left them, hurt them, all those years ago. "Well it isn't like it would be the first time you know" she spat back. She was pacing around the room, this had escalated quickly. She just wanted to make sure that Neal knew where she stood on the "He and Henry" topic, to not deal with any of past tonight. She had to leave, she didn't want to deal with this now. She began to head towards the door when grabbed her arm and pleaded "Come on Em, I never wanted to hurt you" His pleading eyes started right at her as she turned around to respond. All the pain was rising up in her as if it was fresh, she could feel the tears start to form in her eyes. If she was honest with herself she knew she never stopped loving Neal, it just hurt too much. She whispered as she looked down to prevent her eyes from giving her away "but you did". Neal could tell she was about to cry. The way she looked down, the way her body had tensed up. It was happening all over again, he was hurting her - no not again- There were so many things he needed to tell her, but first he had to get her to not leave so they could talk about this. She was about to turn and head towards the door again when, as a last ditch effort he pulled her close. "Emma, don't.." As she looked up and again they both locked into each other's eyes - both filled with mixed emotions and questions. He decided to make his move and kissed her hoping that would convince her to stay. When their lips met they both closed their eyes, it had been so long… But no, she pulled away quickly. No, not like this - she wasn't just going to cave in to him. "Listen I have to go" she said as she turned around and began to exit, she looked at him was last time and said with the exhaustion that came from trying so hard to fight everything that she was feeling "not now Neal, not like this" and she closed the door behind her. He looked down and the tears built up in his eyes. There was still something there… and now with that comment, he knew she felt the same. He would find a way, he would show her that he had changed…

Our Hearts are Wrong

hate has brought me up

the stairs into your house

i'll not let hate be the one

to make me naked for you

my self-esteem

is heating up the room

you're intimidating as all hell

but i ain't scared of you

i know how you work

i am just like you

no matter what you say

our hearts are wrong

love has brought me down

like love's been known to do

i try to deny with all my heart

that i'm in love with you

i don't really care

you knew that's what i'd say

the only time i miss you

is every single day

i know how you work

i am just like you

no matter what you say

our hearts are wrong

i know how you work

i am just like you

no matter what you say

our hearts are wrong

Read more: Jessica Lea Mayfield - Our Hearts Are Wrong Lyrics | MetroLyrics