Zack was currently leaning over Cloud's desk, staring at him expectantly.

Cloud quirked an eyebrow, coffee cup still to his lips.

"…what?"

Zack grinned at him, white teeth peeking out from chapped lips. "You said you had a friend that was a bar owner, right?"

Cloud instantly tensed, blue eyes widening and his heartbeat thrumming. He was silent a long moment, eyes soon narrowing to the young pup in front of him. "Yes," he answered slowly, as though if he said it slowly Zack might not interpret it correctly.

Zack pumped his fists in the air, "Aw yessss!" he hissed under his breath, attempting to contain his excitement. "Do you know how to get drunk? Do you have a recipe for that?"

Cloud nodded, turning back to his paperwork. "I do know how to get a Soldier drunk, yes." He turned back to the first, cocking his head in the way a cautious chocobo would. "Why?"

"Because," Zack replied with the enthusiastic waggling of his hands "Kunsel has never gotten drunk before, and neither have the Generals, so I thought it would be a good idea to give them a hangover for the first time because I was thinkin' 'Who's never gotten smashed before?' and I realized everyone needed the experience-"

Cloud held up a gloved hand to silence him, setting his mug down. "Wait. You want to get the Generals, the strongest of the ShinRa soldiers, drunk?"

Zack waved his hand nonchalantly. "I've got a little hut set up in the wastes for this kind of opportunity, so even if someone did become a rage drunk they couldn't do much damage."

Cloud tapped the pen he was using to sign documents up against his chin methodically, considering it. Zack grinned again, much like the cat that swallowed the canary, and he leaned in with a hand cupped to his face. "Hey Cloud," he leered, "I know where to get you that spiced chocolate you like so much."

Cloud froze in place, and he slowly turned to Zack. He looked a little more convinced.

"Show me you aren't lying," he sighed, rubbing his head with his hand. Zack produced a few squares of the peppery candy to him, and Cloud stared at him blankly.

OOOOO

"I can't believe he went along with this," Kunsel sighed as he listened to the rattling of the Van. Zack laughed aloud, and Sephiroth eyed Cloud who was holding a large crate full of various alcohols inside. Cloud didn't look back, but a slight sweat was forming at his brow.

Angeal, who was driving, asked aloud "Hey, why'd you let Genesis bring Cloud?" He was referring to the smaller version of Cloud who was sitting alongside the crimson haired warrior, and Strife rolled his shoulders.

"He and I will be sober."

Genesis was madly grinning; probably excited to actually get drunk for once, but both Angeal and Sephiroth were still weary. As they neared the small house Zack had set up in a hurry, the older Cloud lifted the crate up onto his lap, and as the Van slowed to a stop, he had to carefully stand to make sure he didn't drop the contents of the box.

They entered the small hut, made of plywood and held together by old nails and faith, and it was then that they realized this may not have been the best idea.

There was only one room of the hut, and it contained a single table and six chairs. There was a smaller table off to the side, a fold out, and it had scuffs and various stains on it. The larger of the tables had a gash in the middle, and the short end of one side was leaned against a wall. The wall had a smudged mirror leaning against it; a poor effect of making the place look lived in. Instead, the minor interior made it look like the set of a play positioned by amateurs in the slums.

Zack presented it with great grandeur, the jazzy shake of his massive hands in the doorway. "Ta-daa!" Cloud sighed, pushing his way through the horror-struck crowd – they would be getting drunk in this henhouse?! – and he sat himself down at the smaller table, revealing the contents of the box.

It contained several unidentified bottles with the labels peeled off, but a few brand name wines and local alcohol bottles were in as well. Cloud mixed the various liquids with a grace that showed his experience in such matters, pouring the sharp smelling liquid into mismatched cups.

Sephiroth sniffed his cup experimentally, before bringing the rim of the cup to his lips.

OOOOO

"Uncle Cloud, why are you recording this?"

Cloud simply smirked as he snapped his phone shut; he had enough footage.

"Don't worry about it," he replied, ruffling his younger counterpart's head.

OOOOO

Sephiroth had never been blessed by the affliction of a hangover, and he certainly hoped he would never feel it again.

He held a bag of ice to his head and Zack was intermittently giggling and wincing. "Worth it," he groaned, a grin fighting his mouth. Kunsel sauntered in, holding a grocery bag filled with various Mako-safe blood thinner medicines. They all winced at the loud bang the door brought, but Genesis was still passed out on the lobby couch.

Somehow Cloud dragged their unconscious bodies over to ShinRA headquarters and splayed their half-dead forms on the various couches and armchairs. It was quite a sight for Tseng to behold when he walked through the door that morning, but he would never admit that he took a few pictures before leaving the sleeping creatures.

"Heeey," Zack groaned "Kunsel, why aren't you flailing in pain?"

Kunsel grinned, pulling up the rough canvas of his soldier sleeve, showing a thin red ribbon. "Cloud showed me where to buy one, and I popped it on my shoulder before drinking. I thought this only worked on status materia, but it helps with other stuff too."

Zack thrust and accusatory finger at him, hissing "traitor!" under his breath before accepting the medication Kunsel retrieved.

Angeal was simply smiling at the boy's antics, while wincing at his own burdens. Genesis awoke from his slumber and cried out as he covered his eyes.

"It's so bright," he mumbled, arms crossed over his face. "Would someone cast blind on me?" Before anyone could make a witty retort, little Cloud walked in with a large paper bag. "Hey there," Genesis smiled, waving to him. "Where's your uncle?"

He shuffled his feet, suddenly looking very nervous. Zack sat up, rubbing his head. "Cloud…?"

"He wants you to meet him in conference room three," he blurted suddenly, sweating all the while. "He told me to give these to you…" He held the brown paper bag up, and they peered in to see what seemed to be different snapshots of the ShinRa building. One showed outside, another the bathrooms, a few others random hallways. One picture was of Tseng's office, and even more alarmingly, he was in the picture staring at the cameraman with a suppressed smirk on his features.

"What is this?" Zack asked aloud, fingering one of the laminated photos with a concerned expression. Little Cloud only chuckled nervously, and led them to the third conference room.

As they walked, Zack continued to chatter, the medication kicking in. "Cloud's the type to be all mysterious, but this is getting weird. I mean, these pictures, do they mean anything? Or is he just being all clever and planning on pranking us or something?"

"I don't think he's that kind of person," Sephiroth mused. "He's not likely to jump out of the shadows." They stepped into the conference room, each taking a seat and glancing back to little Cloud, who passed out each of the picture cards. They each got two, except for Kunsel who eyed the child. Little Cloud closed the doors and looked up to the podium expectantly, and they all turned to see Cloud standing there. He hadn't been a minute ago.

He was in his casuals, which was odd, considering none of them even knew he had casuals, and they consisted of a white button up shirt and black slacks. He looked like a turk out of uniform, except First Tsurgi sat in the corner assuring them he was still a Soldier. However, Cloud looked more than a little disturbing in his new garb, more-so because of the smile that drew his features up, His blue eyes were burning brightly, and still illuminating his cheeks in a faint aqua glow, but it looked frightening with his eyes half-lidded.

Sephiroth was startled when he realized the look of that smile. It was mischievousness, the expression an intelligent child makes to a dull adult.

More-so, that fact that his heart skipped a beat when he glanced at the golden First.

"Cloud," Zack asked with a slightly shaking voice to his credit "what's up with this?"

Cloud said nothing; he only lifted up his hand and turned the projector on, while the lights went dark. Sephiroth assumed his younger counterpart must have turned them off. The screen flickered from blue to a grey, a few key selections on the light screen. Sephiroth could spot Cloud flicking through a large laptop on the table, and it was then he realized it was a video.

"Oh no," Genesis whispered hoarsely. He knew what was coming, but what?

The screen flickered once, before showing a moment of the night before.

Kunsel was leaning up against the wall, passed out almost instantly. The soldier alcohol was too much for him.

Genesis was under the table he was originally sitting at, screaming Wutaian as loudly as he could, slurring the words badly. It probably didn't even make sense in its native language.

Angeal and Zack were patting each other on the shoulder, mumbling things to each other before Zack bellowed "I love you man," and Angeal responded in kind. They started embracing and even crying a little bit, having a sweet bromance.

Sephiroth was staring at something, pointing his finger at it. "You know, you're gonna get it someday. You won't expect it, but it'll happen." He hiccupped. "One day," he hissed "you'll sl-sl-slip. And I'll be there when you do." The camera panned out to show that he was in actuality talking to the mirror, thus himself, and he face-planted the table.

Little Cloud's voice could be heard. "Uncle Cloud, why are you recording this?" The footage stopped then.

Each and every man in the room was shuddering, running their palms along their faces. All except Kunsel, who pumped his fists in the air in appreciation of no blackmail, as he was unconscious in the footage. Zack took the opportunity to run up and smash the computer, bits of plastic and metal whizzing through the air. Cloud was still smirking, not at all surprised, still leaning against the podium. Sephiroth found it oddly attractive.

"There are eight other copies of this, and the master copy," Cloud smiled, sweet as honey.

Angeal swallowed. "So then… those pictures…"

Cloud simply nodded. The generals took off, stumbling over each other in a mad attempt to find the copies before they could be found by a passerby.

Sephiroth looked at his pictures. One was a random hallway in the ShinRa building; it could be any room, except it showed a potted plant in the corner. That narrowed it down slightly, and the room number was blurry but started with a "4". That meant floor four, that narrowed it a little more.

The second was a picture of the room he was currently in, the conference room.

Lucky him.

It was a picture of the podium, but Cloud was still leaning against it.

Damn.

He approached the stairs slowly, Cloud eyeing him. He hadn't moved from his current position, even though the room had already flooded out of the people there. Zack had dragged Kunsel along with him, demanding for help, and Genesis practically dragged Little Cloud away claiming he needed a nimble child to climb up the ShinRa building. So they were alone. That didn't make Sephiroth feel any more constricted, no, not at all.

The first looked ghostly, as the only light was the blue light from the projection screen. It made his blue eyes seem less illuminated, but it made the rest of him almost look translucent.

"Cloud," he stated, hoping he didn't sound swayed "move aside."

The first shook his head.

"Why are you doing this?" Cloud cocked his head, a small smile still on his features. Sephiroth wanted to get angry at him for playing games, but the entire thing was actually kind of funny, if Cloud wasn't dressed so oddly.

Wait a minute…

"You're dressed like a turk," the silver haired general stated. Cloud nodded, still smiling with mirth, as though waiting for him to catch on to some joke. "Reno put you up to this, didn't he?" The other first tapped his lips with a single finger, as though saying to be quiet. Sephiroth was quiet, instantly, as the other first placed an alabaster hand near the General's cheek. With the flick of his wrist, Cloud produced the disk with the footage from seemingly behind his hair.

"Here," he stated in his usual cool voice. Sephiroth felt warmth rush into his cheeks at the sound of his customary tone – why did that have a romantic effect on him? – and accepted the disk. "It's not just Reno," Cloud elaborated, his face the usual flat expression. He rubbed his jaw. "I haven't had to smile like that in a while," he mumbled, massaging his face.

Sephiroth was starting to catch on. And he had to get that other copy of the footage before some poor secretary did. But, before he would leave…

As Cloud turned to shoo Sephiroth away after his performance, he was startled by the yank on his shoulder and cool sensation on his cheek. He turned to say something in a half-flustered half-angry way, but the silver General was almost to the door.

Sephiroth turned toward Cloud for a moment, stating "You should dress in casuals more," before he bolted out the door.

Cloud's jaw clenched as he mumbled unhappily under his breath, a furious blush fluctuating under his cheeks. He rubbed his face, hoping he could rub the kiss off, but the tingling sensation didn't leave.

OOOOO

"Just try!" Zack screamed as the wind beat against his face. Kunsel was currently hanging of the edge of a window, reaching for a slim disk wedged in between two bricks in the ShinRa foundation.

"Thing things I do," Kunsel muttered, before he reached out desperately toward the disk.

OOOOO

"Why are you in my office?" Tseng asked with his fingers interwoven, watching the scarlet warrior with a critical eye. Genesis laughed nervously, until, without his eye on him, Little Cloud nodded toward Tseng.

The turk produced the disk, much to the Genesis' delight.

"The other one won't be so easy," Tseng mused, leaning back in his wheeled chair. He held the speaker that was always attached to his ear. "Safe?" He asked aloud, hand cupping is ear. He nodded, before eyeing little Cloud with an impish smile.

OOOOO

Angeal rubbed the back of his head nervously as the secretary handed the disk to him, giving him a flirtatious smirk and blowing him a kiss as he walked away.

He had to get to the other one soon, before another one from his fanclub caught wind of it.

OOOOO

Sephiroth scanned each of the doors. This was the place alright, but none of the doors had the disk on it. Perhaps the ceiling? Looking up, he saw no distinguishing features, when a though hit him.

Rustling around the plant, he lifted the pale plastic pot up and spotted the ethereal surface of the disk. He slipped it out from under the plant and easily snapped it into six pieces, and he crumbled it to bits when he reached the trash can.

Now where was Angeal? The man would certainly need some help, as he was alone in the buddy-system.

OOOOO

Cloud nodded, the slim black speakerphone hidden by his hair. "Yes, the Master copy is relatively safe. Mini-Chocobo has it tucked under his shirt, in a smaller memory disk." He clipped the audio off, sighing. When Tseng asked him about the fallen soldiers on his couch, he wasn't expecting the ringleader to produce an entire gag and testing system wrapped around the Soldiers under the pretense of a "relaxation exercise". Next time, he would just keep his mouth shut when it came to matters like this.

He leaned up against the podium once more, sighing, ducking his chin into his collar. It was going to be a long day, wasn't it?

OOOOO

Zack cheered as pulled the other disk out from a crevice in the ceiling, crushing it in his hand easily. Kunsel clapped off from the corner, the disk he retrieved already shattered dust.

OOOOO

Angeal rubbed his head as he stood outside the ladies' restroom.

This was going to be utterly incredible.

OOOOO

Genesis groaned as he exited another elevator, no disk on the ceiling anywhere. It could have been likely that someone took it, but it was still frustrating.

Little Cloud stood next to him uneasily as they entered the next elevator.

OOOOO

OOOOO

They piled into the room, Cloud once again smiling sweetly and Sephiroth hiding mild satisfaction at the expression.

"We've taken out all the disks except for the master copy," Zack stated fiercely "so where is it?"

Cloud smiled again, this time stepping back from the wooden podium with his arms out. "I have it." A rippled of gulps and whispers went through the men. "Come and get it," he continued with a bowstring smile.

None of the men moved. He had his sword only feet from him, and the fact that he looked so relaxed made them all tense. His lazy movements reminded them of a cobra; with him, it felt like you had an eternity to move as he approached, but you never did.

Sephiroth stepped forward, and he saw Cloud visibly tense. Now, Cloud didn't like physical contact, except for that one time in the café and the general pushed that out of his mind instantly, so why hide the disk on him? Unless…

He turned on his heel and pulled little Cloud toward him. The child was quick though, and was soon out of his grasp and hiding behind his uncle with a determined expression.

They were all prepared to gather their forces and lead a strike against the Strife's, but the older Cloud held the side of his head like the Turk's did, obviously receiving information. "Yessir," he responded loudly, and he waved his hand toward his smaller counterpart.

Little Cloud pulled the disk out from his shirt, and tossed it toward the crowd of men. Angeal caught it one handed and crushed it, much to the men's relief.

"What's up with this?" Zack asked, finally fed up.

"They've wanted to test all your investigative abilities for a while now," Cloud replied, tugging the thin wire and speaker out from under his hair. "You had motive and you were all afflicted by hangover, except Kunsel who they figured out was A-class intelligent by now." Kunsel grinned from under his helmet, crossing his arms. "So it made sense, considering he wasn't doing anything while drunk, so he wouldn't have to participate."

"But what about our reputations?" Zack wailed as he held his hands up.

"There was never any footage on those disks," Cloud sighed, finally tugging the last of the tape free from his skin. He snapped the ear-piece in half and threw it in the trash bin. "They just needed you to have motive."

They all groaned, save Kunsel who, unsurprisingly, suspected it all along.

"-And you've all done very well," replied Tseng from the doorway. He flicked the lights on, so the room was no longer being illuminated by the projector. "Except you, Zack. Kunsel lead you around half the time." Zack grumbled angrily a moment later, arms crossed.

Tseng told them to go home, or to their quarters, for a break. They all had severe hang-overs still, except for Kunsel, Cloud, and his small counterpart.

"Heeey," Zack drawled "What do you get out of this, Cloud?"

Tseng handed him three spiced chocolate bars.

"Holy crap," the first blurted "you really will do anything for that stuff."

Cloud rolled his shoulders anxiously. "It reminds me of home," was his quiet and gentle reply. The team scattered after that, not wanting to bring up any more of Cloud's painful past or the question of how good his mother made chocolate considering he affiliates it with hot spices.

Cloud himself sat in his room, munching on one of the bars, content. The flavor was a little off, and he may have been the only consumer for things like this, but it still reminded him of his mother's horrible luck when it came to cooking sweets. Suddenly, there was a knock at his door, and he peeked out to see another of his favorite candy – which was now becoming a small stockpile next to his bed – and he picked it up. Tied to it was a note written swiftly, almost clumsily.

It stated "Care for round 2? –S"

To any passerby, they would have seen the first stomp back into his room, a flustered look on his face.

Sephiroth, around the corner, smiled inwardly to himself and walked away to conquer the paperwork that was no doubt looming at him.

OOOOO

Zack slammed his palms against the table, eyes glinting. "Cloud showed me how to make it."

"That is a horrible idea," Kunsel stated. Zack didn't reply as he grinned, pulling out several bottles.

Each reeked of a different alcohol.