If It Meant Keeping Them Safe
By. SadieAnnabethMellark

Summary: One night, when Harry is watch Ginny rock little baby James to sleep, he truly understands why his parents sacrificed themselves for him.

Disclaimer: Sadly, I am not J.K. Rowling. If I was I would own Harry Potter.

In just four hours I had to leave for a mission in Chad, but I didn't care. As I stood outside the nursery room door and looked in on my wife and colicky two month old son, I couldn't have cared any less. I just wish that I could send someone else in my place, but sadly my attendance to the mission was nonnegotiable.

I watched as Ginny tried to rock a cranky James to sleep looking like she was about to keel over and die herself of exhaustion. She was looking down on our son with love in her eyes, trying to be soothing, as she sang, what sounded like some old Irish drinking song (which, no doubt, one of her older brothers had taught her), quietly to him. She was still oblivious to my presence; to wrapped up in our son's memorizing eyes...the ones he inherited from her.

Though, she looked bone tired, I couldn't help but look at her and think if how beautiful she was. Her long fiery tendrils of hair were pulled up into a messy ponytail and her warm brown eyes still shone like they did when she was in her fifth year and I in my sixth, when we first started dating, even if they did have dark circles underneath them. And her smile, which I thought was on of the best features about her, was still that warm addictive one she had always had. The one where as soon as you saw it, you couldn't help but smile too. I could see that smile everyday, and never ever grow tired of it.

She was still singing softly to our baby as he fussed and cried out in pain. She was still trying to soothe him into going to sleep.
"Hey, love." I told her quietly as I entered the room. She looked up at me with concern.
"You're suppose to be in bed. You have to leave in just a few hours." she told me.
"I know. But, I think, I would rather spend those few hours with the two people I love the most instead of sleeping." I told her as I knelt next to the rocker peering down at James in her arms.
"Fine, its your head if your tired in the morning." she joked. I smiled to myself.
"Hey, buddy, does your tummy hurt?" I cooed to my little baby boy as I brushed a stray little piece of his unruly red hair off of his forehead. Even at two months old, James already had a full head of Potter hair, something that Gin was not to happy about. James continued to scream in response.

Ginny switched positions so he was held against her chest as she patted and rubbed his back; trying to be of assistance. She smiled sleepily once more at me.
"Really, love you should go to bed. It's two in the morning." she told me.
"I'll only be gone for a week tops." was my response. She closed her eyes for a few seconds and then opened them again.
"I really wish you didn't have to go."
"Me too, love, me too."

We were quiet for a few minutes, both of us listening to the cries of our son as he tried to get comfortable enough to go back to sleep. My son, the thought was still as amazing as it was when Ginny told me that we were going to have a baby. It was still hard to believe that he was actually here.

Ginny continued to rock back and forth.
"Shh, sweetheart. It's alright." She whispered to our son quietly. I smiled at both of them.

It was quite sometime before Ginny was able to get James to sleep. And when she finally did, it was four-thirty in the morning.

"Will you put him in his crib, love?" Gin whispered. I gently pulled my small son out of her arms and cradled him in my own. He was still so small and fragile. I remember how I thought he would break if I so much as held him the wrong way the first time he was placed in my arms. Funny how that fear never really seemed to fade.

I carefully carried him over to the crib and softly kissed his head good-night before I lowered him into it. When I covered him with a blanket that was covered with bright yellow snitches and he didn't even flinch. I felt arms wrap around my waist from behind as I looked down on my sweet little baby boy as he slept.

I pulled my wife to my side and held her close as together we looked down on our sleeping son. Just like his mother, he was beautiful. I was still dreading when I would have to get up in about an hour to leave for Chad. It was times like these when I hated my job. It was when I couldn't be home with Ginny and James, when I had to miss the Sunday Dinners at the Burrow, when I had to miss George and Angelina's wedding that I hated this job with a fiery passion. I hated missing these things, but I couldn't help it. Work called and I had to answer, no 'ifs', 'ands', or 'buts' about it.

But this was also the reason I loved my job. So that people could live in peace. So they could watch their friends and siblings and kids get married and have kids. So that people could go to family gatherings. So people didn't have to sneak around just to get to work without being killed. So parents could watch their kids grow up and not fear for their lives. Work called and I answered, because I anted to make sure people could live their lives, even if it meant that I had to fit out of the blue work trips to other countries and middle of the night raids into it.

Before James was born, I could never fully understand how much my parents loved me. Sure, I knew that's why they fought Voldemort and that's why they didn't step aside so he could have me, but I didn't fully get it until two months ago. My parents wouldn't step aside, because they loved me to much. They were willing to die themselves so that I could live. They loved me like I loved James. Like I loved Ginny.

If something were ever to happen, I wouldn't hesitate to fight off a dark wizard so Ginny could flee with our son. I wouldn't hesitate to step in front of a dark wizard with no wand to protect James. I would die to protect them both. And that's another reason why I stayed on with the auror department when James was born. I didn't want any of the people we hunted down to be near my family.
"Lets go to bed love. I don't know about you, but I'm beat." Gin whispered so she wouldn't wake James.
"Yeah." I gave her a slight squeeze and then I guided her out of the nursery and towards our room.

A/N: (Not quite how I planned to write this, but I think it turned out okay. What do you think? Well, Read. Review. Favorite. Follow. Check out my profile page. Thanks. S.A.M.)