Over joyed the birth of our son, I didn't seen the pain of our daughter. I didn't notice how unhappy she was. For in my eyes one could never be unhappy to have such a beautiful and loving family as I felt we had. Then our world was rocked when our son died. I never imagined that things could get worse.

I was worried about half-pint since the baby's death as she seemed to take it the worst. But I never imagined what could possibly be going on in her mind. It never occured to me that she might feel guilty or responsible for his death.

My worry lifted when she one Sunday after church showed since of being her old self again. Running around and playing with her sisters and even me. Laughing and having a good time, just like she had so many other times before.

The next morning was the second worst morning to date at that point. Laura was gone. She left a note saying she had, had bad thoughts. I couldn't fantom what they could be. She was a sweet and innocent little girl. Mary said that Laura had a hard time saying an extra for the baby cause she thought all I cared about was him.

This put instant blame in my mind for whatever Laura had done and the fact that she was now missing.

I went to her favorite places with no sign of her at her. I had told Mary to stay home from school with her ma, in hopes that she could help Caroline not worry so. I went out to where my best Isaiah Edwards was working and inquried of him for him. He and Laura had always been close so I knew that he'd be more than willing to go with me on the search.

Even though he told me not to blame myself when I expressed how I'd been blind to how Laura had been feeling, I still couldn't help it. She was gone to heaven knows where and it had something to do with something I had done or said.

Night time fell and still no sign of Laura. Where could she be? This was the second night she was gone. And it was cold. I wondered how she would bare the night, or even if she would. When and if I found her would she even still be alive?

The next day we stopped to water the horses, it was then that I allowed to let someone see how I was feeling. I had tried to so hard to be strong. Not to show my fear that Laura could be gone forever. How could I ever deal with losing another child? Especially so close to already losing one?

I stood by my horse and bent my head down and began to cry. I felt Isaiah start to motion towards me and I didn't want to hear anything he might say, cause if he said that it would be okay or that she was going to be fine, I didn't want to admit out loud my fear it wouldn't be.

I walked to the other side of the creek and began to fill up the cantine. I looked up to the sky and just prayed that Laura was alright. That somehow God was taking care of her. And I told myself that if I found her and she was alive that I'd never be blind to her needs or any other of my children't need and feelings ever again. Just let her be alive. Let me find her.

Then like a sign from heaven of an answered prayer, a small wooden cross floated drown the stream and bumped into my hand. I lifted it out of the water and there I saw it it. Craved ontot the cross was the name Laura. It had to be hers, it just had to be. And wherever she was, or whoever she was with had made it and somehow got it to the stream prehaps in hopes of someone finding it.

Edwards and I who had been travling down stream quickly turned around and headed upstream in the direction the cross came from. It wasn't too long that Edwards pointed out on a not too distant mountain side smoke that looked like it might be coming from a fire pit. We took off as fast as our horses would take us in that direction.

It seemed to take forever to get up the mountain side as hope grew inside me that if I could just reach the top I'd find my daughter.

As I took the last step to the top I looked up and there standing in her worn and torn dress with ratted her was Laura. She was alive! I froze with my heart in my throat. My daughter was alive! I then started to move towards slowly hoping she wouldn't try run the other way. Much to my delight she ran right to me and I fell to my knees grasping her as tight as I could hold her.

"Why? Why did you do it?"

"I thought you needed Charles more than me?"

"Why would you think that?"

"I just did."

At that moment I didn't care why. She was alive, okay and in my arms. She told her about a man named Jonathan who took care of her, but we never found him. But I never doubt for a second he had been there and was real. He was her guardian angel I was sure of it. An answer to all our prayers.

I then looked at Laura and picked her up and holding her oh so tightly I carried her down the mountain. I told her over and over again how thankful I was that she was okay, and that I loved her more than she could possibly know.

Caroline, Mary and Carrie came out of the house as they heard our horses return. Laura jumped down from my horse I had held her on and ran towards her ma and sisters. Streams of tears fell from every eye there.

Laura would never truly tell us why she did what she did. She said it was just between her and God. And we never pushed it.

And I kept my promise I'd make by the creek, never again did I fall short on trying to see the needs and feelings of my family.

End