Originally this was going to be a sad-ending story but I decided it's going to be tragic and horrifying but it won't end that way.

This story was inspired by a dream/nightmare. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I do not own Fairy Tail.

Chapter One, Life is a world of pain.

Lucy's Pov..

I sat at a table alone staring at the ceiling wondering what I did to have Kami hate me so much. What did I do wrong? The very question circled my mind every minute of the day and I never get a good answer. Seven months! Seven months have passed in my life. Of that time my life has been wasted down the drain. Apparently no one sees me or hears me, well I know they do but they don't acknowledge it. Sigh, life's a bitch sometimes.

I was shaken out of my thoughts when I felt someone's hand shake my shoulder. I looked over my shoulder seeing my team, well barely. When Lisianna returned I was thrown out of existence in Fairy Tail. Though I don't think Lisanna meant to cause it, however it hurt like a dagger in the back and another to the heart. Maybe I had like Natsu a lot, but that changed as soon as I realized he's clearly into Lisianna. They're a good match after all, so why should I interfere?

Besides for the past six months they've been a team, and of course leaving me behind during missions. I guess now their ready to finally remove me from the team.

I zoomed back to reality as Natsu began to speak. "So Lucy, Lisianna's been on our team for a while now and since you weren't with us, we thought we might as well remove you... you know from the team."

Yes I haven't been accompanying you cause you've left behind. Finally I gave up in hanging around you guys, especially considering I clearly noticed you're obvious glares toward me whenever I approached you guys. In fact I was painfully waiting through these painfully long past months for you to finally kick me off!

So I bore my dull eyes into his, enjoying as he flinches and takes a step back away from me. Mentally I sigh before standing. "Listen I know, I already removed myself from the team when you guys went off without me, so after a month I took my leave. Now I'm just a solo mage, so I saved you the trouble. There was no point to 'waste' you're time telling me something I've known for six months." I would've yelled, but I lost the spirit in making a scene.

Team Natsu was in utter and complete silence, that is until Gray recovered first. "Oh, ok. Thank you for understanding, Lucy." He said before turning and walking off as the others just nodded, now recovered also, and went back to their "normal" routines.

Over the months I've grown stronger, though everyone still views me as that "weak, cheerleading, Lucy". I am practically life-less now, abandoned once again but this is worse than my father. They actually acted like family only to end up throwing that friendship away, uncaringly so too. I clench my fists in anger at the very thought. To remember the feeling of being unwanted and unheard is unimaginably painful. I suppose I am just a lost mage now, my spirits have tried to talk to me but I don't let them pass through. Leo has been the most persistent, however not even he can help me now.

I sigh aloud this time and get a good look around the guild. Mira is happily ordering drinks, like always. Elfman is scoffing on manliness, Natsu and Grey are fighting while insulting each other, before throwing arms around each other acting like best friends when Erza is glares at them from being interrupted from eating her strawberry cake. Gajeel is with Levi while she reads and deciphers riddles and master like always, is nowhere to be seen.

I watch as the guild doors open and Lisianna is greeted like a goddess before Natsu runs over to her, wrapping his arms around Lisianna's shoulders, and kisses her deeply. Mira squeals behind the counter and instantly grabs a camera and gets a photo of them for the Fairy Tail scrapbook.

Watching Natsu make-out with her caused me to feel yet another knife in my heart. The feeling I grew used to, however this had become too much. I knew they have been a couple but they never kissed in front of the entire guild like this. To make it more official, right as they kissed they got multiple woots and aws from the guild members causing my eyes to drift away in another direction, away from it all.

I felt tears well up in my eyes but quickly shaded my eyes with my bangs. Even though the roaring noise of the guild was loud, I could still hear the angry storm of thunder outside.

I casually walked through the guild doors evading tables and mugs, along with the occasional persons, and make it to the guild doors. I quietly muttered "Stupid god," to myself before opening the guild doors and leaving.

Half way to my apartment I was walking casually along the river bank with my hands in my jacket pockets, as I pull my hood up and looked up at the raining clouds. These dark purple storm clouds darkening magnolia has somehow helped in calming myself.

Once I reached the end of the bank, I kneeled at the edge of the river and finally let out the tears that I had been holding back for seven months. I cried silently while my tears were covered up by the rain -which was the point- and finally let those hateful thoughts cascade my mind.

You're nothing to them.

You're weak.

They probably just used you..

They've replaced you!

You're nothing but a weakling to them..

A loser of the famous Fairy Tail!

They never loved you!

They loved her..

They lied..

You're nothing!

Just like you're father said,

Useless..

I'm unheard..

I'm unseen.

I'm nothing to them!

Maybe that's how it always was.

Was it all an act?

It was, wasn't it?

I don't exist through their eyes anymore!

I am invisible..

Why do I even live when I'm this far gone?

So that's what I am again huh?

I'm lost.

Yea lost and alone, no surprise there..

Maybe I should just disappear forever...

My head snaps up hearing a low growl, and I see a shadowy figure of what looks like a wolf.

But it looks different somehow. It's on the others side of the river just watching me, not moving. It's left eye is bright green and the other is blood red. I hear a voice surrounding me causing me to jump up and look around but found no one. I turn back around to the river where the wolf was but it was now gone. Suddenly I felt something pressing into my mind before I literally felt thoughts fill up my mind..

Sadness, anger, sorrow, despair, hurt, rage, and a few other emotions filled my mind, I felt like I was losing it. I brought my hands over my chest where my heart beat below, all while feeling this murderous pain. I couldn't move, it hurt so bad. It wasn't even in physical pain, only mental pain. It felt real enough though and soon I began to see black spots in my visions as I was being pulled into the void. I had one thought before I lost consciousness,

Turn it off, turn it all off and make it disappear!

One Month later..

I woke up on the hard ground, looking up my eyes were met with the clear midnight sky meaning it was night. Sitting up I found a dull and aching pain against my stomach and arm. I slowly got to my feet, biting my cheek as the pain rose against the movement before fading into nothing as though nothing was wrong with my body. Looking at my arm though I knew that was a lie. Blood covered my right arm from just below my shoulder to the very tips of my fingers, though now dried.

It was a strange event, I don't remember falling asleep or even getting hurt. I gently touched the wound causing dried blood to slide away from my arm revealing a hideous bite wound. Surprisingly, I felt no pain from the movement of touching the wound. That was even stranger considering just moments ago it hurt.

I looked down at my stomach and found my jacket had been torn open revealing my blood-soaked t-shirt beneath it. It looked like it hurt but once again as I brought my hand to the wound, it didn't even hurt the slightest. I couldn't tell what the wound looked like however, only that it must've bled a lot from the amount of dried blood covering my stomach and abdomen.

I figured I should probably get back to my apartment to clean up but that meant I would be walking through town, appearing like a bloody mess. Which I kind of was at the moment. This is a forest though, and I have no clue where I am but I can at least figure there is a source of water around here.

Even as I walked aimlessly through the forest, it hadn't been too long until I found a small river stream. I slowly removed my jacket first not wanting it to accidently cause my wound to open, and tossed it into the river. Fortunately the stream was soft so my jacket wasn't about to get washed away by the stream but was instead sunken slightly beneath the surface of the water. I watched the dried blood slowly remove itself from my jacket before washing away down stream, though the water was now slightly pink in some areas from said blood. After another minute or so I reached in and pulled my jacket from the water and began to wring the rest of the water and blood out of it. After another few cycles of washing my jacket it was clear of blood, though the huge hole in the front of it meant it was unusable. Even so, I could feel the breeze of the wind and any warmth was better than none.

Slinging my jacket up on a branch to dry, I took off my shirt before walking back to the stream to work on washing the blood out of it. Three cycles later, I knew the shirt would serve me of no use so instead I shredded it into strips to serve as bandages to wrap around my wounds later. I gently added them to the branch as to prevent from further tear and headed back to the river once again.

Looking down at my reflection I was met with my near bare torso if not for my black push-up bra, and the remaining of the black blood on the top half of my body. I focused my eyes on my face and was surprised to see my hair had grown in length as though at least a few weeks had passed, but that couldn't be right.. It's only been a day hasn't it?

I think back to where I last was, which should have been just half a day before at the most.. Let's see, I left the guild during Lisanna and Natsu's make-out session in front of the guild. Thankfully it no longer hurts just thinking about it. After that I was walking home when I stopped at the edge of the river near my house, and then.. what?

I thought hard on it and looked at my reflection one more time and suddenly found the eyes of my reflection were no longer it's usual dark brown. Now they appeared two different colors..

My left eye was a brilliant green while my right was a crimson red. That couldn't be right though.. It must be something in the water or something else, there is no way my eyes could just change color all of a sudden, right?

Then I remembered seeing these eyes on someone else, no, something else.

The wolf.

I remember it being on the other side of the river, and then came the pain right? After that, I felt myself lose conscious and then..

I woke up in the forest similar to where I am now, I stood up and looked around to find a clue as to wear I was. Then I heard a growl, turning around I was met with the same wolf I had seen at the wolf. It had brought me here then, hadn't it, but how? I froze when it bared it's fangs at me and I suddenly felt the overwhelming urge to run as far away as I could from this beast.

So I ran, but the beast was to fast. It came at me from the side and lashed it's claws out against my side, getting me from the left side of my abdomen and down to the right side of my stomach. I remember feeling the pain, no, it was agony. I remember falling to the ground on my back, looking up I was met with the wolf standing over me. It leaned over closer, digging it's left claw further into my stomach for a better grip before opening it's mouth revealing the sharpest teeth I have ever seen in my life. I tried to moved but that only caused it's claw to sink further into my stomach. I was doomed, I remember feeling that utter fear build up inside of me. The wolf's red and green eyes met my own, and I could swear it was smiling at me. Those thoughts ceased however when it's eyes turned to my shoulder and it sank it's daggers for fangs into my arm.

I screamed in pain, I screamed in fear, and I screamed when I felt a blurry image cross my mind of what could have been.. a dragon? I could hear my flesh tearing as it dug it's fangs so deep in my arm, I wouldn't be surprised if they went through my arm. However the wolf soon let go, before backing away from me. I put my left hand over the wound on my right shoulder from where it bit before looking back at it.

It's eyes flashed black before fading away like a ghost into the wind. I let out a final agonizing scream as my body burned in pain before it became too much and my conscious slipped out from beneath me..

Ah, so that's what happened. That means a day has passed though, it couldn't be any more than that. I sigh, and think whatever. I'll figure it all out later, when I'm clean from dried blood and dressed in clean clothes to be precise.

I look down at my black jeans and was relieved that it didn't have even a speck of blood on it. Good, that saves me money from buying a new pair of jeans. I still need to get the rest of this blood of me though. It will be pretty hard to get the blood off my right shoulder though without falling in. Then again, maybe falling in the stream is the best way to clean off the rest of the blood anyways.

Decision made, I shimmy off my jeans so I was just left in my undergarments before slinging my jeans over the same branch with the rest of my drying clothing so I wouldn't forget where I placed it, before walking back to the stream and slowly lowering myself in the water.

I exhale a breath as the cool water brushes against my skin as I lower myself into the stream until I was as deep as I could go in the stream, which was up to my breasts.

Softly brushing my hands against my wounds, I find it much easier to get off the remaining excess blood. Once the blood was all washed from my body and down the stream, I could get a good look on my wounds.

Somehow, in some miracle of a way, my wounds were all healed up to the point were only a pink-shape scar of the wound was all that was left. Maybe more than one day had really passed for this to be possible..

I grab a strand of my hair and find that even my hair has some dried blood in it, and since the ends are wet anyways, why not just wash it as well?

What I can only assume half-an-hour later, I pulled myself from the water before redressing myself in my jeans and grab the strips of what was once my shirt and begin to wrap them around my right shoulder first. Using one hand though is hard, it took me probably a good ten minutes to get the bandage secured around the wound, even if it was a scar I believe it should still be wrapped just in case it opens up again. I grab the remaining strips of my shirt and wrap it around my abdomen and stomach, and by Kami, thankfully there was just enough left for it.

I pulled my navy wind-breaker jacket from the branch and wrap it around myself securely, ignoring the slight breeze against my stomach from where the hole is, and begin walking myself aimlessly but hopefully out of the forest.

By the time I had found myself finally out of the forest, I could tell it was mid-afternoon by the height of the sun in the sky and the heat. Unfortunately as I walked through the town I got odd looks by the people, but managed to ignore them all before finding myself in front of a clothing store.

From what I can assume the owner, gave me a strange look on how I was dressed and clearly noticed the t-shirt strip bandages through the hole, along with the holes of teeth from where the wolf had bit me. I met his eyes and shrugged at the awkward situation. "I just came from finishing a job." I lied, but it was believable enough. I noticed his eyes trail to my hand where my pink Fairy Tail guild symbol lay. I watched him nod his head slowly while he was clearly thinking on something. "Fairy Tail, eh? I recon you need new clothes rather than those rags huh?" He asks me, eyeing my clothing. "Yes, sir." I tell him, couldn't help to be polite anyways.

"Tell you what, knowing how honorable your guild is, how about you pick out an outfit from here, whatever you want, and whenever your back here in Hargeon, you can pay me back. Now off you go, get something better than those rags!" The owner told me happily, surprising me slightly. I guess Fairy Tail comes into some use, after all. Though I'm also surprised he's not angry at Fairy Tail from last year when Natsu caused all that damage. Oh well, whatever.

After looking around his shop for a good fifteen minutes I realize this man has got style. I grab pants, a pair of shoes, a belt, a shirt, and a cloak before going into a dressing room. I quickly strip off my clothing except for my undergarments and then slip on the clothing. I left on the bandages but as for the jacket I tossed that into the garbage bin. The black jeans, those I merely tossed over my shoulder before walking out and going to the front desk where the seriously considerate owner was.

He looked over what I was wearing before grabbing a slip of paper, scribbled something on it, before handing it to me with a smile. "Nice blend, no one really comes here for clothing because it so "unusual" but you, you got style." He told me, and I grinned back at him and accepted the paper.

It read:

Hargeon, Unique Styles

Amount Owned: 45,000 Jewels

Since I'm in Hargeon it'll probably take me a few hours to get to Magnolia. If I get going now, I should be able to be there before six. "Thank you, sir. I'll be back when I can!" I told him, waving as I walked out, hearing him say, "I count on it," making me smile.

Now, time to return to Fairy Tail and get it over with before going home and sleep. It's been a long day..

Normal Pov, at the Fairy Tail guild..

It was just about another normal day in Fairy Tail with the exception of their missing member, Lucy Heartifilia. Not that it really made a difference, it wasn't even known until someone asked of her from the weekly magazine and they had no idea where she was.

Not that they even cared in the first place..

Such proven as they carry themselves around the guild like they always had. Drinking, eating, fighting, their usual brawling selves. The guild make such a loud ruckus, one would think that Magnolia would complain.

However the sound of the front doors slamming open caught all of the guild's attention causing them to quiet more than usual. At first they didn't quite see the figure who opened the doors, but as the person stepped forward everyone just about dropped what they were holding when they saw who was there.

Lucy, of course.

But it was more of what she was wearing that caught their attention. Even though she had changed her style from tight skirts and sleeve-less shirts long ago the guild lacked in their attention span to even notice it. Now however, she had their attention real good with her current outfit. The one she got from Unique Styles in Hargeon.

She was wearing Tripp NYC (New Dungeon Dweller) Bondage Pants, a red tank top seen just barely under a black and red hoodie, and to finish the outfit off she wore white skull Ed Hardy High-rise. Red and white headphones wrapped around her neck as well, a new brand that not even Laxus was aware of.

Her blonde hair was now waist long and the right side bangs covered her right eye. Somehow, she appeared stronger despite the clothing and even appeared as though she weighed less. Strange thing to the guild was the music she was playing, or rather blasting since everyone in the entire guild could hear what she was playing which sounded like Alternative Metal. It was as though she was trying to block out everyone's voices around her, and somehow no one doubted it.

No one moved as she stood there, both sides analyzing each other until it was broken suddenly. Natsu seemed to be the only one unaware of the vibe Lucy was giving off, or maybe didn't care as he approached her. However the moment he stopped to open his mouth Lucy grabbed his shoulder before literally flipping over him. She did it so quick and silently some of the guild members were questioning her eyes, including Natsu.

Lucy was completely unfazed by her little stunt and headed to the bar ignoring the silence the guild has given around her. If anything she took it for granted, enjoying the silence the guild has only showed once before and that was when Mystogan had put almost all of them to sleep when he came in for a mission.

When Lucy reached the bar, Mira couldn't stop looking at her, in what Lucy knew was disbelief or maybe shock.. probably both. Lucy, on her part though didn't seem to care. Knowing she had their attention (for once) she uses it to advantage and talks for the first time on her own accord in a long time since her previous team. "Mira, is the Master here?" Lucy asked her, her voice a void of any emotion but seemingly was noticed (for once again) by Mira along with everyone else in the guild, who could only gape at her.

Mira looked really nervous wondering what she wanted to talk about and could only speak on what Lucy could assume was auto-pilot. "Y-yeah, he's in his office now." Lucy nodded and slid away from the bar before walking up the stairs to the S-class floor where Master Makarov's room is. She knocked on his door twice before disappearing inside a moment later, shutting the door silently behind her, leaving the rest to all wonder the same thing in question.

"Was that really Lucy?"

In the Master's Office..

Makarov looked up from his sixth stack of endless papers to see Lucy, and boy was he startled to see how much she had changed. He was curious to how it happened but figured he would figure out in time, that's just how things went in Fairy Tail.

Lucy was only three steps inside Makarov's small office but seemed perfectly fine with her position.

"Good afternoon Lucy, what do you need? Did Natsu destroy the guild walls again?" He asked her, frowning slightly at having more paperwork to do if that were the case.

"No Master, actually I was wondering if I could change my guild mark position and color?" She asked her, catching him off guard slightly. He didn't show it though and instead nodded and motioned her closer with his hand.

"Sure, sure, just come closer so I can remove the mark before placing on another." He told her, gently grabbing her hand when she was close enough.

A golden magic circle appeared from the palm of his hand before slowly moving towards the top of Lucy's hand where her pink guild mark lay. Her guild mark glowed pink for a moment before disappearing along with the golden magic circle.

"You're the second person to have your guild mark removed Lucy. In any case were would you like the new guild mark?" He asked her, rummaging through the drawlers of his desk before finding the guild stamper.

Lucy rolled up the left sleeve of her hoodie up to her shoulder, before pointing to the area right below the fabric of her hoodie sleeve where it was rolled up. "Right here, in black, Master." She told him simply, watching as he pressed the cool ink into her skin before removing it three seconds later revealing the new black Fairy Tail insignia.

"Alright, there you go Lucy. Anything else?" He asked her kindly, putting away the guild stamper back in it's drawler.

Lucy rolled down her sleeve and shook her head slightly. "No, that is all Master. Thank you." She told him, before opening the door and silently walking out, leaving Master Makarov sighing at the seemingly larger pile in front of her knowing he had to have it done by the end of the day.

"Annoying Magic Council." He grumbled to himself, pulling out his feathered pen before continuing his work in misery.

Lucy's Pov..

I noticed my guild silently watching me, I expected them to have gotten over it by now. Then again, maybe I have finally snapped that image they hold over me of who I had once been. Annoyed by the silence I turned my music up higher before placing them over my ears instead of having them over my shoulders and eyed the stairs. It's been a long day and I really just want to go home to my nice comfortable bed, and go to sleep. I have a lot of things to figure out.

Because of that, I decide to take a short cut from the taking the stairs down and instead just leap over the railing. I land on the wood almost silently but it was still heard since the guild has gone unusually quiet with their eyes on me.

Funny, for seven months I've wanted them to finally take notice of me, but now that's happened, I don't even care anymore. They're no family of mine, if anything I feel like a stranger in this place.

I'm just going to head home, hopefully tomorrow they'll be back to their ignoring and loud ways.

However half-way to the front doors, Team Natsu decides to approach me.

So I stop and turn to them, crossing my arms and looking at them expectantly for interrupting my journey to my comfy bed.

"What might Team Natsu need from me of this lovely hour of the day?" I asked them with sarcasm dripping into my tone.

Erza was the first to speak. "Where were you? You disappeared for a month and you just come back like nothing happened."

"And what's up with your eyes? Are you cosplaying again." asked Grey.

Natsu asked the strangest yet simplest question. "Are you really Lucy?"

I grinned inwardly and decided to play with them, since their the ones that started this whole thing and I'm tired.

So I acted like I didn't hear them and then turned back around to see them waiting for my answer. I lowered my head phones and looked up at them and said "Wha?"

Everyone sweat-dropped. I watched as they re-asked their questions and waited for me to answer, man this is fun. When someone has ignored you for almost an entire year, one of the best ways to get back at them is to mess with them. Ah, and is it price-less.

"Lucy?" I heard Natsu asked, woops, I didn't even hear what he said. Ignoring people really is pretty easy.

"Oh, sorry. I was spacing out." I told him, turning off my music and lowering my headphones back on my shoulders to hear them better, because whatever their going to say to me is going to be so good.

"Please tell me you at least heard what we said," said Gray.

I turned to him and raised an eyebrow in question before speaking. "Hmm? Oh yes you're questions."

Should I even answer them? They've left me behind like a toad for so long, why don't I do it to them? No! I'm nothing like them.

"Such boring questions, such boring memories." I tell them smirking, before sighing again, as though in defeat. "Come back later I'm too lazy to remember."

They looked at me shocked, but as they were just turning around to leave, I did a cliché thing and lifted my finger in the air.

"Oh, wait now I remember." The team turned back and looked at her not so patiently, but tried to hide it, and failed miserably. Fairy Tail isn't very good at hiding things.

"Gray to answer your question, no, but would you believe me anyways? Probably not." I told him, and before he could reply with even a single word, I'm already facing Natsu.

"Strange, one would thing that as someone who was once your partner would recognize them, guess your not as loyal as I thought. So yeah, I'm Lucy. Just not the same one you remember." I told him before swiftly turning on my heel towards the guild doors.

This time I actually made it past the guild doors, but before I could actually walk outside, a hand grabbed my shoulder and kept me from moving further with little effort.

I hiss a curse under my breath before turning around only to see Erza, former teammate, staring at me with her calculating eyes on me. Wonderful.

"What do you want now, Scarlet?" I asked her, visibly annoyed now.

"You didn't answer my question." She told me strictly, as though I was to report everything I do to her. I barely hold back a twitch from the irony of the situation.

"And what was your question then?" I ask, because I really did forget what she asked. I didn't even care either, I just want to leave this place, yet ironically for once they're stopping me from doing so.

"Lucy, I asked you where you were and why you were missing for a month." She told me, sternly with disappointment in her eyes that made my eyes twitch.

I breath in a bite remark and exhale slowly. No need to get angry over something that doesn't matter, that never seemed to matter in the beginning, especially to them.

"Erza, why do you even care? Just a month ago you told me you wanted me off your team. For seven months you haven't even held a conversation with me, and now you talk to me like you care? Well guess what Erza, you don't care. Just like how I don't care about you, that feeling, no, that trust was destroyed the moment you proved to me that Fairy Tail isn't a family. It's a curse. To answer your question though, I'll tell you this; Where I go and why will never be your business! Not for me, and if you ever try to make your own, I'll make you regret you ever met me. Good bye Erza, I hope you learned what it's like to lose a family member, because this person," Lucy says pointing while pointing a finger at her heart, "will never be a sister of this guild if they treat they're members like they don't even exist." I give her a mean smile, something I could only describes cruelty, but she needs to see it and remember it. I scoff when I remember what I once felt about her. "I can't believe I once saw you as my role model, as my sister, when your not any of those things. Honestly, you don't even deserve the title "Titania" from what I've learned of you. When I look at you, the only thing I see is someone who would desert and abandon those who put their trust into you. And I promise you that I will never look up to you again, considering I can barely even look at you now. Go back inside where all the fun and joy is now, it's where you belong, with the rest of your kind." I growl the last sentence at her before pushing her towards the doors, before leaving. Happy to be rid of this place.

By the time I'm inside my apartment, I feel my exhaustion finally catch up with me. Taking off my headphones and placing them on my desk, I chuck off my hoodie, and then my shoes before slumping into my chair behind my desk. I sigh and stare at the book in front of me that I had been working on before the seven months of abandonment.

Now though, I can't bring myself to touch it, to continue it, or even throw it away. I pick it up, and flip through the pages randomly before closing it. It's time to begin a new journey. A journey where my trust belongs to me and only me.

I open up the bottom drawler of my desk, the one filled with my letter's to my mother that I haven't written to in a long time actually, and place the book in with the letters before closing it. I look over at the sheet of blank writing paper before grabbing it almost hesitantly and put it in front of me.

I pick up my calligraphy pen then press it to the top left side of the paper. I let out a slow breath before I began writing:

Dear mother,

I'm sorry I haven't written to you in while. I've been thinking over some things and I've decided that I'm going to carry myself on my own. You have always been strong before me, before your.. death. Even now I feel like you're watching over my shoulder. That's why I hope you can understand my reasons from here on out. The guild I've told you so many nice and wonderful things about, are not as great as they seem.

I am sorry that this is how it is, but that is just how things will be. Mother, will you understand if I betray the light? Everything has become so hard, and I don't think I can carry myself as you had always been. I don't know how you were able to live through such hardships, but one thing I know for sure, is that I don't have your strength.

Instead of being strong in the heart like you had taught me to be, I will darken my heart and be strong in everywhere except my heart. Honestly, my heart cannot take anymore abandonment or pain. And you no what the strange thing is mother? I don't even feel pain anymore. Not physically or mentally. My sadness was killed six months ago, my fear was killed one month ago, and all that's left in me is the anger..

Mother? Are you disappointed in me? For this decision I've made. I'm sorry if that is so, but this is the way things will just have to be. Maybe I could be happy again without having to pretend, but Mother, I just can't fake it anymore. Especially since there is no one left to love anymore. You're gone, Father never loved me for anything more than money, and my guild has proven to me that I was never apart of their family.

I will no longer falter on my path anymore, the only option I have left is to be on my own and care only for myself. That way, I shall never have my heart be broken again. Twice is enough isn't it? It is for me. I'm sorry mother for disappointing you, but this is the last time I shall walk in your shadow.

This might be the last time in a long time I will write to you. Once again I'm sorry, but not for what I'm about to do.

Miss you dearly.

Love,

Lucy.

This is what I imagine what Lucy's appearance looks like:

Same height

Hair reaches her waist, still blonde, one bang over her right eye similar to Lucy in Elfen Lied.

Left eye is a brilliant green while her right is crimson red

Long three-lined scar going from the left side of her abdomen to the end of the right side of her stomach.

Another three-lined scar going from the middle of the other scar down to her belly button.

A large bite-shaped pink scar on her the top of her right shoulder.

New black guild mark on the top of her left shoulder.

She's lost weight from not eating in a month without realizing it, making her skinnier than before.

She is slightly tanner from laying unconscious in a forest for a month.

This is the change in her abilities:

New magic

The ability to sense things a dragon slayer can

She will not be overpowered however.

Find out more in the story..

Edited on 2/14/2015