Wanted to try an OC-Self-Insert myself, hopefully it won't crash and burn.

I do not own Katekyo Hitman Reborn

"I'm not Superman, so I can't say anything like "I'll protect everyone on earth!" . I'm not a modest guy who will say "It's enough if I can protect as many people as my two hands can handle." either. I want to protect... a mountain-load of people. -Ichigo Kurosaki, Bleach.

There's a well-known quote that says: 'When life gives you lemons, you make lemonade.' Many people follow this belief and end up achieving their life long dreams, it's amazing really.

I'm too lazy to even go up the stairs to sleep in my bed, so it was obvious that making lemonade was far down on my to-do list.

"Fujimoto! I know you're in there!" An insistent banging echoed through my house, and I lifted my head slightly to give the door a tired stare. "Don't make me break this door down!"

"So loud." I grumbled and burrowed under my nest of pillows and blankets. I never understood how she could be so energetic.

A beat of beautiful silence.

CRACK!

I jolted up in a heartbeat, my short hair sticking up a thousand different directions as I gave the door a wide-eyed look. The fist that had broken through my door slowly relaxed, showing perfectly manicured nails, like a deer in headlights I watched as the hand ventured downward until it reached a bronze door knob.

"You better have the draft done Fujimoto." Her voice was deadly calm, not a good sign.

Ah, that was the third door this month.

I cuddled myself in the nest of pillows as my editor scanned the newest chapter I had made, thankfully she had calmed down once I gave her what she wanted.

"This is…" I brought the blanket down to peek at her with half-lidded eyes. "Amazing!" She exclaimed with shining eyes.

I grunted and pulled the blanket back over my head.

She giggled and I knew she was doing her little happy dance. "The scenes you've drawn are so sexy!"

"They have to be," I drawled my voice slightly muffled. "My fans would make a ruckus if I didn't make the sex scenes appealing."

"Straight forward as usual," She commented and I heard her heeled shoes walk toward me. "On another note, have you even interacted with a human being besides myself this month?"

I shifted but didn't say anything.

She hummed thoughtfully. "What about the sun? When was the last time you opened your curtains?"

"I don't like bright things."

"You know the sun is good for your health, it wouldn't kill you to see it once in a while."

"I'm a vampire."

She gave a sarcastic laugh. "Yeah and I shop at Goodwill."

Ah, with that being a hundred percent untrue and impossible that meant I wasn't a vampire. And I was so sure too.

My editor and I had a very unique relationship. Kimiko was the only editor who had stayed with me so long; the other ones had eventually gotten annoyed at my lazy habits and sarcastic attitude and left. It was unheard of to even think that we got along, she was practically a model while I stuck to big clothes and making nests of pillows and blankets for beds. Logically we were completely different species, yet somehow she had lasted as my editor for three years.

Everyone was mystified, no one had thought it was impossible to motivate me and had asked what her secret was. She said all I needed was someone who understood me.

I'm pretty sure her super strength was the biggest factor in the equation.

I heard her start to rummage through something and I curiously peeked back over the blanket. She brought out her expensive looking phone from her leather purse and started to play with it, her nails clicking against the screen as she scanned whatever she was reading. She made a quiet 'ah' and sent me a blinding smile, I was instantly on guard.

"You have a book signing today at one."

I gave a loud groan and tried to become one with my pillows.

"I'm such a big fan of yours Fujimoto-Sensei!" The girl commented with an excited smile. "I just love everything about your manga."

I gave her a bored stare. "Good for you-"

A heeled shoe stepped on my foot.

"- Thank you for the compliment, I try my best to make my readers happy." I replied with a slightly pained smile.

The girl giggled and walked away with her newly signed book and I slumped in my chair. "How many millennia must I endure this Kimiko?" I sent my editor a tortured look. "All this activity is making me tired."

Kimiko tsked. "You've only been signing books Fujimoto."

"It's exhausting."

"Too bad."

After everyone had gotten their books signed and left I was finally left to go home, and let me tell you it's the best feeling in the world. I was free, no more talking or interacting with my fans, though I appreciate their support, I could go back and sleep in my nest.

I took two steps away from the table when I bumped into a person, I stumbled a bit but gained my balance before I could fall. "Sorry," I gave the man a half-lidded look as I spoke. "Didn't see you there."

The man twitched and backed up a few paces mumbling to himself. "Sorry, so sorry. Didn't see you there, so sorry."

I raised a brow at his odd behavior. "It's not like it was your fault anyway, so it's nothing to worry about." I didn't want to draw too much attention toward me, it would spend too much energy and I didn't like it when people stared.

Kimiko came to my side when the man continued to mumble to himself, she gave him a wary glance and grabbed my arm. "Come on Fujimoto, I want to bring you to a hairstylist before you hermitify again. Your hair is a mess." Was hermitify even a word?

I grumbled but allowed her to pull me.

"I'm so sorry!" The man yelled from further behind us and I turned my head to look at him, my eyes widening.

Shaky hands fumbled with the weapon and his face was drenched in sweat, I could see his eyes shifting nervously as people started to panic at the sight of the gun. Dread filled me when he finally aimed the gun and pointed toward my direction, not toward the people who were staying in one place and staring at him, but at me who was getting dragged by Kimiko who had yet to see the gun.

"Sorry, sorry, sorry." The guy ranted his eyes wild.

"Kimiko." I pulled at my still trapped arm, I wanted to get out of his line of sight as soon as possible.

"Don't think you can get out this Fujimoto, you're hair looks like you cut it yourself." Kimiko retorted, I could tell by her firm voice that I wasn't about to get out of this.

"Long hair is too much trouble." I replied before sending a nervous look toward the man. "But it looks like that guy would really like to shoot me so can we move to the side just a little bit?"

Kimiko stopped and turned her head to look at me. "What do you mean-?" Her eyes widened in realization and a gun shot went off.

At first it was silent, the loud bang of the gun echoed through the town and the buildings started to tilt sideways. Oh wait, no I was falling it wasn't the buildings.

Kimiko let out a shrill scream and scrambled to catch me, thankfully she was able to because I certainly couldn't move.

"Fujimoto! Someone call the police!"

People were screaming in the background but Kimiko's was the loudest, and if I could cover my ears I would have, because she was especially loud this close.

Her eyes were watery as she looked down at me, tears weren't something I was used to seeing in her eyes. They didn't suit her.

"Just hang on, okay? Don't give up."

I suppose dying is different for everyone because no one dies the same way, there were theories on what people say such as 'a bright light' or 'their whole life flashing before their eyes.' I could feel my body losing the will to live, the man had a surprisingly good shot for a crazy person, and I could only wait until I finally left the land of the living. As for what I saw, Kimiko was sobbing above me, but just behind her a pure blue sky stretched above us. I never liked daytime, the sun was hot, people tended to be out and about and there was the chance of being ambushed by a spider. Right now though, the sky was the most beautiful thing in the world to me.

Ah, the blood loss is getting to my brain, I'm starting to sound as crazy as the crazy guy.

"You still have the next chapter of your manga to work on." Kimiko seemed to think that reasoning with me would lessen the chance of my death. "Just think about how your fans will react."

A few tears from her eyes fell on my face and I forced myself to give her my usual half-lidded stare. "Probably make a big ruckus." I replied thinking about all the trouble they would cause. "I was about to draw a BDSM scene too..."

She gave a laugh that sounded like another language due to her sobbing. "Straight forward as usual Fujimoto."

My eyes were slowly getting harder and harder to open each time I blinked, and Kimiko instantly realized it.

"Where is the ambulance dammit?!" She yelled lifting her head up and looking around frantically.

I didn't die a hero, and in fact my death was far to dramatic for my liking. I wanted a peaceful death, but you can't always get what you want.

There are lots of different thoughts regarding where a person goes when they die. And truthfully any of them can be true, but none of the living would know the truth until they die themselves.

For me I was faced with a giant woman.

She cooed down at me with sparkling brown eyes. "Hello Tsu-kun."

I gave the strange woman a half-lidded stare and replied accordingly. "Daaaaaa." Huh, that didn't sound like 'who the hell are you?'

Whoever the woman was, she sure did like her sunlight, I reached my hand to pull the blanket over my head and saw small pudgy fingers. Did I shrink and gain weight? I guess Kimiko was right about how eating too much Pocky is bad for your body. I gave my hand a hard stare, rather fascinated, what in the world would make my hands shrink to such a small size?

The woman giggling caught my attention again and she sent me a radiant smile. "Tsu-kun is so cute! You're just as handsome as your father!"

She was rather energetic, like a certain editor I knew. Dear God I hoped so didn't have super strength too.

I took a moment to look around the room I was in, it was brightly painted and decorated with stuff animals and baby toys. I was in a blue crib with bars surrounding me on all four sides like a prision, was this where people went when they died? A babies room, dressed in babies clothes with a giant woman staring down at them?

Don't tell me I de-aged to a baby! I didn't want to go through puberty again, that was way to stressful and dramatic. But then again, didn't babies get to sleep all the time? Hmm...

What did she mean by handsome? I know I didn't have the biggest of boobs, but people can usually tell I'm a girl. Not that handsome has to be used for boys, it just wasn't really said when aimed toward a female.

"I can't wait until Iemitsu sees you! He's going to be so proud!"

I froze, I had heard that name before.

"Just as soon as he finishes his work in the Arabian Desert he's going to come see you, so you'll meet your Tou-san soon." The woman continued, her eyes were longing as she spoke and I felt slightly bad for her.

Iemitsu Sawada was that construction worker from Katekyo Hitman Reborn right? The drunk that fell asleep in his boxers and sent ridiculous postcards from ridiculous places, that Iemitsu?

I gave the woman a hard stare, long brown hair and wide brown eyes, a sparkling aura, that was most definitely Nana Sawada. How...tiresome. What in the world was I going to do? Katekyo Hitman Reborn was full of action, shooting, people throwing bombs, things I was very adverse to. Maybe I could just stay at the sidelines and sleep through the whole thing, that sounded like a good idea actually... build a nice pillow nest and cover myself with blankets... mmm.

"Tsu-kun? Are you sleepy little one?"

Wait, doesn't Nana have a son named Tsuna? Isn't Tsuna the main character of Katekyo Hitman Reborn?

...

SON OF A BISHOP!

In my younger days I was an avid reader of Katekyo Hitman Reborn, I liked the plot and adored Hibird, but once I grew older and became a manga artist myself I sort of stopped. (A Yaoi manga artist to be precise) I was going to have to run around in boxers and basically be a babies play toy, I was going to have to become a mafia boss! I squirmed and held back the tears of frustration threatening to spill out, I didn't want to run around yelling 'Reborn!' I would much rather hide in a dark room and be bothered by a preppy woman with super strength.

Being the good mother she was Nana saw my distress and instantly thought something was wrong. "Oh Tsu-kun come here." She picked me up gently and wrapped her arms around my body. It was slightly disorienting. "It's okay little one, Mommy is here."

I didn't even remember everything that happened in the manga, how in the world was I going to make sure everything ended out okay? Especially me being me, I was just content with burrowing in my nest and sleeping the day away. I wasn't mafia leader material, actually I bet the cannon Tsuna would be a better candidate then me. Which was sad really.

Ah, my life is over.

I uncharacteristically burst into tears. "Waaahhh!"

Nana made a startled noise and started to rock me soothingly. "Hush it's okay Tsu-kun, it's okay."

Slightly embarrassed by my outburst I quieted my loud crying, it wasn't like me to suddenly start bawling but I did just die and get reborn into a fictional universe. Well not so fictional anymore.

"What a big boy you are Tsu-kun." Nana praised a beaming smile on her face.

I stared.

...

...

...

..

.

I was a boy.

WHAT THE FROG?!

"Waaaahh!"

When life give you lemons you make lemonade, right?

So what do you make when life kills you, revives you, sticks you in a place that doesn't suit you at all and then just to mess with you more decides to turn you into a boy? What kind of drink do you make with that?!

So yeah... *rubs head*... review? Tell me what you think about it?

As for pairings, she was a yaoi manga artist so... But it's not going to be romance centered, I'm not a huge fan of lovey-dovey stuff, and they're a little young... but perhaps some later on...?

I hope you enjoyed!