Welcome, welcome to the sequel of Everybody's Darling. Oh, I just love that!

Also, happy birthday to Twihard475! *throws confetti*

)o(

I stare up at the ceiling from under the water, small bubbles floating up towards the surface. My chest is beginning to ache with the lack of air and the water is much too cold by now, but I'm not ready to get out of the bathtub. It's such an odd luxury, a bathtub. I've come to depend on it to an almost ridiculous amount over the last few months.

I like the comfort of it, the fact that if I fill it completely I can actually swim in it, that it's something that doesn't remind me of anything in the Games.

And I love that the water can be so hot it hurts my skin, that I can scream with my face submerged and no one will hear, that I could easily drown myself and be done with the guilt and the nightmares and the pain.

But, as I do now, I always end up breaking through the surface, choking and gasping and drawing in air desperately.

I don't know if it's because I owe my life to the friends I've lost and can't stand the idea of throwing that gift away or because I'd break Mum and Katniss by dying or if it's just a selfish, primitive need to live. I like to think it's not the latter.

I climb out of the water and wrap myself in a huge, fluffy robe, wandering about the giant house I still haven't gotten quite used to.

Katniss is at school, just like Rory, Livia and Estelle. Mum's seeing patients and I wasn't allowed to come today, because she's not sure how long it'll take and I have to wait around for my team. And with Effie being on the train with everyone else, I don't even have our almost daily phonecalls to distract me today.

Even Buttercup deserted me in favour of going off to hunt somewhere.

I get dressed, grab some food and march over to Haymitch's house. It was a total dump when I first set foot into this place. I talked him into hiring Livia's mum as housekeeper, so now my mentor doesn't live in a dump any longer and my friend doesn't have to take out more tesserae. Hazelle comes by twice a week, too, to cook and collect the laundry.

I myself drop by almost every day, to make sure he eats and doesn't drink himself into a stupor. He never stays sober, but atleast he mostly remains responsive for my sake.

Atleast twice a month Katniss will run to his house in the middle of the night and drag him out of bed because we still haven't figured out a better way to deal with my nightmares. Haymitch, somehow, helps by just being there.

I'd been home for not even a week the first time it happened.

Clove has me pinned to the ground but instead of her knives, her hands are filled with berries. She shoves them into my mouth until I'm choking, her smile growing wider and wider, nightlock juice dripping from her mouth onto my face, her teeth stained red."You don't deserve to be alive. Anyone else but you should have won. Cato should've gone home. We both should've. You couldn't even save Rue."

The nightlock stains turn into blood and her eyes are dead, unseeing. She pulls me against her, half a hug, half a stranglehold. Her voice changes and suddenly it's no longer Clove.

"I died for you,"Amber hums into my ear, her blood soaking us both. Her hold tightens and tightens, pressing the air out of me, crushing my bones.

"Prim! Prim! Wake up, Prim, wake up!"

My eyes snap open and I realise I must have been dreaming but there's still arms wrapped to tight around me and the hair resting on the shoulder I'm pressed against is brown. I scream as loud as I can, scratching, biting, fighting with all my might.

"Mum!"Clove screams."Mum! Help! Please, Prim, stop. Mum!"

And suddenly reality catches up to my panic-addled brain."Katniss?"

"Yes, little duck,"she whispers, her arms loosening around me."It's me."

I take one look at the bloody tracks I left on her face and arms, then I wriggle away from her, shaking violently, and crawl under my bed. I can't hurt her more here.

Katniss and Mum beg and plead for me to come out until Katniss gives up and goes to collect Haymitch.

He lays down on the floor next to my bed on his side and looks at me with a sad smile on his face."Sucks, huh?"

"It really sucks,"I whisper back and we stay like that for a while, quietly lying on the floor. Then he holds a hand out to me, one eyebrow raised in a silent question. I nod and scramble over to him.

Mostly I can deal with my nightmares by myself or by sleeping in Mum's or Katniss's room but sometimes I can't pull myself out of it all; then they get Haymitch for me.

Sometimes we'll talk, sometimes we'll just sit there. It helps.

Haymitch is still asleep when I let myself into his house, sprawled out on the couch."Haymitch?"

He doesn't react, so I nudge him in the ribs with my foot. I've learned that it's better to keep your distance when waking a victor, not just from Haymitch reactions but my own. And he, unlike me, usually sleeps with a knife in his grasp.

No reaction.

"Get up!"I yell and when he still doesn't react, I kick him, harder this time, before jumping back quickly.

He shoots up, knife in hand, his eyes wild. Then he realises it's me and lower his weapon."Oh. Hi, kiddo."

"Hey, old man,"I reply."I brought food. And then you should probably shower. Everyone'll be here soon and you look disgraceful."

"Disgraceful?"he echoes with a chuckle, accepting a bread roll from me and plopping down at the table."What, did Effie tell you to make sure I look okay?"

"Shut up and eat,"I say - maybe I should atleast not used Effie's exact words - and we share a quick grin. I tear my own roll up and slowly pop piece after piece into my mouth. I hate going by the bakery, but the bread is truely heavenly. Luckily, Katniss goes for me more often than not. She'll only go if Rye or Taftan are on duty, though. Meeting Mr Mellark is just too painful, for both of us. Katniss blames herself for Peeta's death as much as I do. I used to hear her some nights back in the Seam, waking up shouting for Daddy to run. Now, she'll snap out of a nightmare with Peeta's name on her lips every now and again.

Shaking off that thought, I force myself to focus on eating. We finish our meal mostly in companionable silence, with the odd comment about this or that and then I go back home.

Mum greets me at the door with a smile that is just a little bit too wide and a voice a little bit too cheery."You've got a visitor."

"What, they're early?"I pretend not to notice that anything is wrong. Past her, I see a man who's clearly from the Capitol but somehow I know that's not the visitor she's talking about."I thought they'd be here at noon."

"Oh, no, it's-"my mother begins only to be cut of.
"This way, please, Miss Everdeen," says the man. He gestures down the hallway. It's weird to be ushered around your own home, but I know better than to comment on it. I give Mum's hand a quick squeeze as I walk past her, my heart pounding in my throat. Surprises are never good.

As I walk toward the door of the study, a door I have never even seen closed until this moment, I can feel my mind begin to race. Who is here? What do they want? Why now?
"Go right in," says the Capitol man, who has followed me down the hallway.
I twist the polished brass knob and open the door a crack. My nose registers the conflicting scents of roses and blood.

Before I even enter the room, I suddenly know who I'll find. I force a smile onto my face."President Snow! What a pleasant surprise!"