"I can still do it. One last kill." Cato spit out, blood dribbling down his chin with a wicked grin. He held Peeta in a vice-grip headlock. I released my arrow into Cato's heart but the sound of the canon told me it was too late. As Cato toppled over the edge of the Cornucopia towards his death, Peeta lay motionless. With a final fearful expression etched onto his face and the odd angle of his head, the baker's son slipped into death as the light left his eyes, extinguishing District 12's hope with it. Everything became a blur. I broke down, sobbing and clinging onto my once ally and friend, wavering on the brink of insanity. I felt rough hands trying to drag me away but I protested with a few well-placed kicks. My body racked with pain and exhaustion, I was vaguely aware of a slight pinch in my arm. As the anesthetic coursed through my veins, the world soon faded to black. I prayed to never wake up.

"Katniss." A voice broke the silence. "Come on sweetheart, please open your eyes."

I begrudgingly acknowledged the voice and stared blankly at my shattered mentor. We were riding back to District 12 in the Capitol hovercraft. Haymitch was looking worriedly at me, the girl on fire. What a joke. My flame had finally gone out. His brows were furrowed with concern, pain and empathy. His unwavering gaze made me shift uncomfortably as I looked away from the same seam-grey eyes we shared. Haymitch audibly sighed.

"It's not your fault," Haymitch said.

Lies. That's all he ever told me. He deceived both me and Peeta, promising that everything would be okay. He was wrong. I felt stupid for putting my faith in a selfish, manipulative drunk. Haymitch was a lying bastard. He promised to save us both, he failed, and I hated him for it.

"You did the best you could. Peeta always put you first, he would be happy-" Haymitch began.

"Don't you dare use his name." I spit out, seething with fury. "Don't act like you know what he wanted or what I need. You promised to save us. You failed as our mentor. You're nothing but a useless drunk!" I couldn't stop the insults, spouting out profanity and tearing Haymitch apart.

He looked taken aback at first, showing signs of pain that soon darkened into anger.

"Fine! Waste away in self-pity. See if I care. Blame me for things that can't be changed and push away one of the few people you have." Haymitch yelled back. He stormed out of the hospital room.

My anger and pain began to fade into numbness. So this is what being a winner feels like, I thought to myself bitterly. All alone. The odds were against me from the start.

There was no ceremony for me when I arrived; perhaps everyone blamed me for Peeta's death. I was too upset to care. Looking around for my family and Gale, everyone was avoiding my gaze. Did they all hate me now? At the center of town, I noticed the new whipping post installed in the center of town and the increase in Peacekeepers, my heart sped up. What happened during the Games? I was escorted by two large peacekeepers to my new house in the Victor's Village. The other 8 houses remained unoccupied, while Haymitch was directly across from me. As I stepped into my new prison I was overwhelmed by the sickly sweet smell of white roses. President Snow. My heart sank, something was terribly wrong.

I was led into a large office. When the doors shut behind me I turned to face the murderous man himself. But then again, I guess I was now a murderer too. When he began to speak, his wicked grin grew larger as he explained District 12's attempt at a rebellion during the games. He explained that the feeble effort had been squashed and that a few select people served as a warning to everyone else. I suddenly realized why no one would make eye contact, why my family wasn't waiting for me when I arrived home.

President Snow's wicked eyes gleamed as he saw me make the connections in my head.

"No," I whispered, almost inaudible. "Gale? Prim?"

My suspicions were confirmed by his malicious expression and I fell to the floor. The final bit of my resolve shattered. President Snow had finally broken the girl on fire. I crumpled to the ground in a pathetic heap as I was left alone and sobbed for hours until my throat and chest protested in pain. Peeta had died in the Games, my family and Gale were killed and I had pushed away the final person I had, Haymitch. Worn out and waiting for my suffering to grant me death, I was vaguely aware of the sound of my front door opening and slamming shut.

My heart sped up. Perhaps Snow had come to help end my misery. I made no attempt to move.

"Katniss?" a worried and hoarse voice called out. Haymitch? What was he doing here? I heard his footsteps come closer, the door to the office open as he breathed a sigh of relief at the sight of me.

"Thank God." He said. He scooped me up from the floor. "I'm so sorry, sweetheart. I'm so sorry." He repeated. For once, I think he meant it. But I was too broken to care anymore. His strong, safe arms wrapped around me as he carried me to my room. He carefully laid me down on my bed, made sure I was settled and began to leave. An involuntary whimper escaped me as he looked back concerned. Perhaps I was afraid that if he left, he wouldn't return either.

"Please, don't leave. I can't lose you too." I should've been embarrassed by my childish behavior, but the last thing I wanted right now was to be alone.

"I know. I'm not leaving, just grabbing a spare blanket and pillow." Haymitch replied gently.

He returned and began to get comfortable in a wooden rocking chair next to my bed. My brow furrowed in concern.

"You can't sleep there. You'll barely be able to move in the morning." I pointed out.

Haymitch waved away my concern, "I'll be fine. You need some sleep." I started to protest, but Haymitch cut me off. "Enough Katniss, I'll survive. Now close your eyes and go to sleep." I struggled to stay awake, making sure he wasn't going to leave. He calmly held my gaze while my eyelids grew heavy and I slipped off into a fitful sleep.

As Katniss fell asleep, Haymitch paused, contemplating on what he should do, before he left to return back to his own prison. He wasn't ready to do this, Katniss needed someone better than him. Peeta was who she needed. Haymitch needed a drink. Ignoring feelings of guilt he went to drown his freshly horrific memories into his reliable booze.