Phantom Gentleman Caught!

Society Figure Arrested by Scotland Yard as Notorious Thief!

(the Daily Standard)

"Actually, we had to have the metal frame hauled out of the water," Jaune explained. "It would have been a hazard to navigation."

It was ferociously inappropriate for a young man, not a family member, to be in the bedroom of an unmarried girl, but given that Ruby wasn't exactly going to be coming down for tea anytime soon, and no one really wanted to face her wrath, tea had been served at her bedside and they'd all basically pretended it was the parlor. She didn't quite have the "blazing fury of the dragon" wrath Yang had spent too much time running around with, but more the "heartfelt eyes and piteous whimpering of the puppy" type that worked better on family members anyway. Even Miss Goodwitch wasn't completely immune, though wild horses couldn't have dragged the admission out of her.

Besides, it was Jaune. He'd known the Roses since he and Yang had been ten. He might as well be family.

"Forget the dirigible," Ruby said. She was sitting up in a nest of pillows, her head still swathed in bandages. The doctors still had her on a strict regimen of bed rest and minimal stimulation, but at least she was home. "I want to know what happened to Torchwick."

"He's securely locked up, along with a number of his henchmen. He should be bound over for trial at the next session of the Assizes."

"Will you be able to connect him to the Phantom Gentleman's crimes?" Miss Goodwitch asked. Perhaps remembering that the last time she'd let Yang act as chaperone for Jaune and Ruby it had ended with Ruby falling off a roof while fighting a criminal, she had insisted on being present. "There was the matter of fighting Yang and, more significantly, you and your police constables, but that would not stand up as evidence of actual theft."

"And that rotter's got plenty of money for a top-flight barrister, too," Yang groused.

Jaune's face fell. "Well, as far as that goes," he began, then broke into a wide smile, "it so happens that we found the Star of the Tsang in an oilskin pouch buttoned up in an inside pocket of his coat. That's about as conclusive proof as we're ever likely to get. Add that to my testimony and Sir Reginald's, and he won't be able to squirm out of this one."

"Woohoo! Ten years' hard labor at the very least, then," Yang crowed. "No wonder he hadn't tried to get out of his coat in the water. That ruby was his emergency fund, since his deal with the gemcutter would still be in place once he got out of the country."

"I'm kind of sorry that you found it, though," Ruby said. "I think the people at Seven Oaks would be better off if Sir Reginald just got rid of it, collected the insurance money, and tried to resume a normal life."

"Simply removing the object of an obsession is unlikely to change the facts, particularly when it is as strong as you describe." Apparently, Ruby had been telling Miss Goodwitch about what had happened at Seven Oaks.

Which is the advantage to having a tutor who's not just there to teach etiquette, decorum, and the ladylike arts. Ruby probably had filled her in as an after-action report, so Miss Goodwitch could evaluate Ruby's performance. That was also likely why she had run interference with the girls' father, since she was aware of the risks and dangers of being a huntress.

Thinking about these things, the starched-blouse blonde seemed like a lot more interesting person to Yang.

"On the contrary, I expect that not recovering the Star of the Tsang would send Sir Reginald into a steep decline. It requires character, will, luck, and generally the support of others to free a person from a dangerous addiction," Miss Goodwitch finished up.

"But that's so sad."

"Unfortunately, Miss Rose, many things in life are so."

"Well, the, we're just going to have to change them, aren't we? I mean, that's what we're all doing, right? Working hard so that we all can help make the world a better place?"

"Don't look at me; I just like to hit stuff and get paid for it," Yang lied shamelessly.

"Yang!"

She smiled widely, then winked at Jaune, whom she figured had all kinds of annoyingly complicated reasons for doing what he did like serving the nation and living up to his family history and expectations and other messy things that would just make him uncomfortable to talk about and make him feel bad for dancing around.

"So a better question is, what about you, Jaune? We saw the headlines: Notorious Thief Brought to Bay; Dirigible Chase Ends in Crash, Arrest. It sounds like you're doing pretty well for yourself. Well, except that editorial in the Star complaining about what would have happened if the airship had crashed into the city instead of the river, but that's just them being sour because they can't complain about police ineffectiveness any more."

"The point was well taken," Miss Goodwitch said primly. "If the detonation had caused a course change, there would be a very real risk of catastrophe. Even the rain was no guarantee against a fire going out of control under the right circumstances."

"But no one was hurt, so it doesn't matter, right?"

"Officially, no, it doesn't, Ruby," Jaune said. "Unofficially, I'm glad that I wasn't the one who brought it down. Fortunately for the Superintendant's temper, the press is focusing on the exciting finish of the villain's career rather than the methods of the police in stopping it."

"It's only natural that a dramatic character like Torchwick would have an equally dramatic finish to his story. I'd feel cheated if the police just stopped him on the street with an arrest warrant and he went quietly."

"That's weird, Ruby."

"No way, Jaune, I totally get where she's coming from. Think how disappointed all the readers of the papers would be if they hadn't had a thrilling end to hear about."

"So you blew up an airship in the skies over London to give the people a better story?"

Yang rubbed the back of her head.

"Well, no, but that doesn't change the point."

"In fact, Inspector, Miss Rose's words are well-taken in this sense: it actually is very likely that the expectations people have for how narratives are supposed to play out is the primary reason why the press has for the most part been supportive of Scotland Yard's and Miss Xiao Long's actions in capturing Roman Torchwick. Had the same incidents surrounded the arrest of a relatively unknown criminal, they would have been viewed as unusual and dangerous, most likely out of place. But since Mr. Torchwick had already redefined "normal" in connection with his activities, his capture is not at odds with the expectations of the public, and indeed your superiors."

They all stared in amazement at Miss Goodwitch, who looked back at all three of them coolly.

"Did you expect me to overlook such an obvious teaching moment?" she said, and one eyebrow quirked up for just an instant, making them all laugh, though Ruby stopped almost immediately and clutched her head.

"Oww…Don't make me laugh."

"That's what you get for laughing at your teacher, sis."

"Yang! You laughed louder than I did."

"But she's not my teacher, so that's okay."

"…That almost made sense. It must be the head injury."

"Yeah, speaking of which, we've kind of got another problem."

"Yang, losing a foot off your hair after you have it cut to fix the damage really isn't a crisis," Ruby shamefully took advantage of her position as the beloved younger sister.

"Not that. I mean, how are we going to explain all this to Dad? He'll be back from the country in another four days, and I don't think one daughter with a severe injury and the other in a newspaper photograph with Jaune while we bring in a notorious thief is really what he expected in his absence."

"I think the fact that you look like a walking bruise and you rode a rope trailing off an airship while you had, as it turned out, two broken ribs is going to interest him more than the photograph, Yang. Just because you're older doesn't mean Dad wants to see you get hurt doing crazy stuff any more than he does me."

"How about we pretend they're only bruised, and I won't mention that you got onto the roof Torchwick pitched you off by launching yourself through the air with an untested Dust cartridge?"

"Done."

"Sisterly love at its finest," Jaune noted in an aside to Miss Goodwitch, who just sighed.

"And the recovery time means that I won't be getting into any more trouble," Ruby added. "I can't damage my reputation from a sickbed."

"Well, if anyone ever wondered if you were really sisters, hearing that logic ought to convince them," Jaune tried another quip. This time he managed to catch Yang's attention: she hit him with the tea cosy. For her part, Ruby went on as if she hadn't noticed the interruption.

"And honestly, I need the time off to work on weapon design. I'm going to have to rework Steel Thorn's barrel to stand the stress of firing Dust shells, and if I do that then I might as well turn it into a proper rifle, like one of those elephant guns they use in India."

"Ruby, if you fired a gun that size the recoil would knock you over. You'd never hit anything."

"Not if I braced it before firing. I could build in a fold-out bipod or weapon rest! Or no, that would kind of get in the way of the blade and throw the balance off. Wait, no—what if the blade itself served as the gun stand? And the extra weight at that end could help hold the barrel down when firing, too! Miss Goodwitch, do you know if there are any teachers who could help me adopt my fighting style for a scythe?"