The Middle Prince

A/N: This story was actually inspired by my sweet boyfriend, who is the middle child of three boys. I thought some of the traits that I adore about him, his quiet nature and natural ability to place peacemaker are traits that I envision Fili to have. So I thought, what if Fili and Kili once had an older brother, and the title of heir to Erebor was one which Fili was forced into, rather than born into. This is a little different, so please, tell me what you think. I actually cried a bit writing this.

For purposes of this story, Fili is 15 (7/8 in human years). Little Kili is 10 (5 in human years), and big bother Doli is 22 (12/13 in human years)

If you had met the brothers later in life, such as when Bilbo did, you probably would never have guessed it. For it was easy as an outsider to see the fierce protectiveness that Fili had towards Kili, and characterize that trait as one only an oldest brother could have towards his younger sibling.

And so, if you met the boys once they reached maturity, you would never guess that Fili was not always the oldest brother.

If you knew the brothers well and you stopped to actually think about it, you would then realize that even to this day, Fili had the character traits of a middle child. He tended to keep to himself, he didn't like to be the center of attention, and was content to watch his rambunctious little brother cause the majority of the mischief. He was a negotiator, a peace maker, and always in tune to the feelings of other people around him. Fili was not by his truest nature the leader which oldest children tended to be.

However, Fili did fill the role admirably and well enough to fool almost all who didn't know the heirs of Durin when they were younger.

See, Fili was not always the protector. He was not always the first born heir to Erebor.

Fili was not always the eldest brother.

In heart, Fili would always be a middle child. The second son of Dis and Kuvin. Kili and Fili have… nay… had an older brother.

Doli had been their everything. Older than Fili by 7 summers, he was lost to them when Fili was only 15, Kili only 10.

Fili remembers what it was like to have someone look out for him. The three brothers were an unstoppable force. They were always causing some mischief, usually with a small Kili atop Doli's shoulders. Fili had a distinct memory of Kili riding on Doli's back, treating their eldest brother as a pony. In this particular memory, Doli laughed good naturedly, and would take Kili from his back and hold him upside down by the ankles Kili would shriek and giggle and begged to be put down.

Fili often could be found trailing behind, as middle children often do. Sometimes he would feel left out for a moment or two, as Doli seemed to dote on little Kili just a wee bit more. But that moment would quickly pass as Doli would turn towards Fili, and hold out a hand for him. "Come brother, you can't expect me to look out for the little one by myself." Doli would say, gesturing towards Kili, wherever the youngest dwarfling happened to be.

Looking back, it was almost as if Doli knew Fili would one day be in charge of their free spirited little brother. Sometimes it was as if his wonderful older brother knew that his time on middle earth was limited, and he had to train Fili to fill his shoes.

Doli had very light brown hair, Fili remembered that very clearly. He did not have quite the golden hair of Fili, but it was closer to Fili's color than the raven locks of Kili and Thorin. In the summer, the sunlight would lighten Doli's hair so much so that it would become very close to Fili's. He remembered that last particular summer; Doli's hair had turned almost the same gold as Fili's. Oh how they teased baby Kili that summer. Kili would sit on Doli's bed, nearest the window, hanging his tresses over the ledge and praying that the sun would lighten his hair as well.

"Don't worry, raven." Doli said, swooping his baby brother into his arms and tickling his stomach. "One day, we will find you a wizard who can turn your hair into gold as well if you want. But I quite like you as a brunette. It makes you easier to spot, and how else am I going to find you up in a tree and keep you out of trouble." Kili would giggle then and hug his older brother; small clumsy fingers running through Doli's lighter hair.

The story referenced had happened earlier that week. Doli had recently started training in weaponry. Fili and Kili, both still too young, had been watching their older brother in practice. Fili was entranced watching his brother and Dwalin spar. It was like watching a coordinated dance. Fili was practically hypnotized by the movements. So entranced was he, that he failed to realize little Kili had strayed from his side.

When the warrior and his elder brother stopped for break, Doli's instinctual reaction had been to glance over and check on his two baby brothers. Fili remembers the grin on his brother's face, so bright it could have lit up the sky. After just a moment, the grin fell. A worried mask taking over his brothers features as Doli ran over towards him.

"Fili! Where is Kee?" Doli asked, panic now in his voice as his eyes scanned the woods nearby. Fili remembers his panic quickly settling in as well as older and middle began to search for the third of their trio.

"There he is!" Doli said, voice sharp and scared. He had spotted Kili's raven locks up in a nearby oak tree.

"Do! Fee! You can see everything from up here!" Kili's little voice yelped excitedly as he waved down at his older brothers.

"You need to come down before you hurt yourself!" Doli replied, trying to stay calm. Dwalin was watching the scene unfold nervously. If Kili made it down safe and sound, this would be nothing more than a normal afternoon for Thorin's golden trio. If he didn't… well. Dwalin didn't want to even try and comprehend the alternative.

"Come up and play with me!" Kili said, still giggling.

"I am going to come up, but not to play, Kee. It's dangerous. I am going to come up so that I can help bring you back down." Doli said before he began climbing up the tree, making his way towards the smallest Durin brother.

It took Fili a moment to realize he was now the only brother on the ground. Without even thinking of plan or purpose, he reached out towards the tree only to be snatched back by Dwalin. "Oh no you don't laddie. Let Doli get Kili, you are staying right on the ground where you belong."

Fili struggled uselessly against Dwalin's strong arms. The panic he felt at being left behind was crippling. His childlike mind could not truly grasp the fear at the thought of losing either of his brothers. All Fili could really understand was that he needed to be with them. If they were to leave this earth, he would have to follow.

The 'rescue' went simply as certainly little Kili did not feel as though he needed to be rescued. At his eldest brother's request, Kili simply threw his arms over Doli's shoulders and allowed his brother to climb back down the tree with Kili on his back.

As Doli hopped down to the bottom with Kili on his back, in that one moment, Fili remembered thinking his big brother was so brave, so invincible, so big.

In actuality, he was a mere child who had just turned 22. That was the age he would be when he passed. Doli was only a dwarfling when he was lost to them.

That winter, a plague hit Erid Luin hard, taking many souls with it. One of those souls was Fili's beautiful, loving, caring, older brother.

Fili remembered when Doli first started feeling ill. Dis had barricaded him to his room and refused to let Fili see him, for fear that Fili and Kili would contract the illness as well. At the time, Doli and Fili shared a room. Kili was still in the 'nursery' although he had out grown it and it had been turned into a toddler's room. Dis had planned on allowing Doli to move into the nursery, changing it into a room fitting for a young dwarf and allowing her eldest to have his own space. Kili would move in with Fili, of course.

However, Doli was in no rush to give up the room he shared with Fili. The two would often share a bed, Fili curled up against his older brother with Doli's arm protectively encasing him. Now that Kili was old enough to escape his "baby" room, Kili would join too, often on Doli's other side as the eldest brother would wrap his little brothers up in his arms and tell them bed time stories every night. More often that not, the brothers would asleep like that and Dis would find her three boys tangled up together in the morning hours.

When his brother first got sick, Fili would sit on a chair across from the door to the room they shared. Often ten year old Kili would sit on his lap. The two would watch the door sadly, banned from entering, as their brother failed to emerge day after day.

After a few days passed and Doli didn't show any sign of improvement, he was moved from their home to the house of healing. Fili was able to see him briefly as some of the stronger dwarf men helped him onto a stretcher and took him out of the house. He was pale, his hair dampened with sweat and stuck to the side of his face. He had not yet grown a beard.

As they moved him by Doli made eye contact with Fili.

"Don't worry, brother…." Doli said weakly as he let out small cough. "It will take more than illness to leave you as the head dwarf of the house." A series of coughs followed. Fili felt his heart tense.

He wasn't getting better, nay he was worsening. Banned from seeing his brother, Fili had taken to listening in the shadows to finding out his brother's status. Each day passed and phrases as blunt as "not going to make it" and "almost everyone who has contracted, man and dwarf alike has passed" were spoken from the healers to their uncle and mother. Dis and Thorin would be gone for hours at a time to stay with Doli. Fili knew that they probably would not be home at all if they didn't have to care for Fili and Kili.

It was when Fili heard Oin tell Dis to "make preparations" and his mother collapsed into a fit of tears, that the young dwarfling could not take it anymore. He bundled up as best he could and fled from the house in the direction of the house of healing.

He knew the place had been quarantined, but Fili was small and clever. He knew how to be unseen if he so chose. He scaled the side of the building, and snuck in through a window and into an empty washroom.

The dwarfling began creeping from room to room in search of Doli. He would duck out of sight when healers and midwives and all volunteers simply caring for the sick would come near. The building was crowded and chaotic, which allowed for Fili to also be overlooked and unseen. Only dwarves were kept in this particular house of healing, but it became evident to Fili the sheer number of victims the plague had taken. For what wouldn't be the first time, he was glad he didn't take Kili with him. He didn't want to expose his younger brother to his own recklessness.

After what felt like ages, Fili finally found his brother. He was being kept in what was once a private room, but could remain so no longer because of the number of the sick. The room was being used for a few sickly dwarves around the same age as Doli. Children were in this room. The few parents in the room, too distraught over their young ones, did not notice the small dwarfling sneak towards his brother's bed.

Fili crept to his brother's side, sitting in an empty chair which had probably been previously occupied by Dis or their Uncle Thorin.

For the first time in a week, Fili looked upon his brother. The dwarf whom to Fili always looked larger than life, suddenly seemed small and frail. Doli suddenly seemed to Fili to look like the child he was. His body was drenched in sweat, skin unbelievably pale. He looked no bigger than Fili was himself, wrapped up in as many blankets as the healing house had to spare.

Fili reached out and took his brothers hand in his. The heat radiating from his older brother's body was unbelievable.

"Mum?" Doli stirred and spoke at the touch. "Told you, go home. Get rest. My brothers…" Doli's voice was weak and raspy and it was only then that he opened his eyes and realized the hand holding his did not belong to Dis.

"Fee?" Doli said, eyes opening even wider and he struggled to sit up. "You shouldn't be here." There was panic in his voice such that Fili had never heard from his older brother before. Fili's heart was sent racing by the tone.

The struggle to sit up was too much for Doli, and he collapsed back down, squeezing his eyes shut. Fili didn't know what else to do, so he held his brother's hand. He didn't trust his voice to speak.

"You could catch it." Doli said weakly. "Please, Fee…"

"I had to see you." Fili said, breaking his silence for the first time. "I had too. You would do the same." He held his brother's hand tighter.

Doli let out a weak laugh, but a smile graced his face for the first time in weeks. "True. But I am older, nadadith, it is my job to watch you." Doli's smile turned sad. "You must watch out for Kili now. The little one is more trouble than he understands."

"No." Fili said, knowing immediately where this conversation was going. "I mean, of course, I always look out for Kili, but you will be fine. You have to be. You cannot leave us." Tears welled up in Fili's eyes.

"I will be watching out for you two from the halls of our fathers. With Da." Doli said eyes shutting once more. His breathing was labored.

"No, please brother." Fili begged.

"I love you, Fee. You and Kili are the world. Stay strong, for him. Tell him I love him too." Suddenly tears rolled down Doli's face. "Don't let him forget me. Please. Or you. You are both so young." The tears came faster. For passing did not scare Doli, but the thought that his two younger brothers who meant the world to him might someday forget his name, well that thought terrified the poor dying dwarfling.

"Never. Never." Fili promised, tears now pouring down his own face as well.

Without ever losing contact with Doli , Fili slipped into the bed with his older brother. Fili lay, curled up against his brother as Doli breathed his last and slipped away to where Fili could not follow.

He wanted to follow, truly he did. But he could not. Kili needed him. It would just be the two of them now, and Kili needed someone to look after him.

"Until will meet again, brother, you will always be our protector." Fili whispered, kissing his brother forehead. He lay curled up against Doli's body, until the tears and exhaustion took him, until Dis and Thorin found them.

A/N: wow. that took a lot out of me. It had been in my head and it had to turn to paper. Please tell me what you think. I'd be happy to continue the story (Kili's reaction.. or maybe Fili and Kili in the aftermath of losing their brother, as Fili learns to be the oldest and their heir)…. But I need to know there is interest since generally speaking, I'm not a huge OC fan.

Also shameless plug: check out my latest Hobbit fic, Into the Wild.