A/N: *cough* *cough*. So, uhm, apparently this took one and a half year...? Like, what? I never intended for it to take so long... Strange how such a long time can go by without me noticing it. And now, for the people who get a notification, I bet most will go like: "Huh? What kind of fic is/was this again...?" And then I think most will be like: "Wow, it took her so long to update! I thought she'd dropped it already!". Ah, once more, I will never, ever drop my fics. Though it might take years for an update (like, seriously, it just might...), I will get back to writing it. Some day, that is... It's just that my life is crazily filled up with everything. 4 Days of school, 3 days of work, 0 free days to do fun things (haha, no, it's not really that bad, but I really don't have a lot of time for my hobbies anymore). Basically. So, writing is put on the backburner. Though I suddenly felt like writing today, so that's what I did ^^. Anyway, I hope you will like this chapter, too!

Reminiscence

When I was nearly nine years old, I got myself something precious. To most, it would seem like a trivial thing, just another toy for another child. But to me, it was everything I ever wanted. Having never had a toy or any such thing besides the toy soldiers, it was a novelty for me that such an opportunity presented itself to me. I can still remember the day it happened. Of course it had been Dudley's birthday. The Dursleys had been preparing for it for an entire week. After all, everything had to be perfect for their perfect little son's birthday. Not to mention the guests, too. All the presents had been bought and wrapped, stowed away in the basement down below. Of course there had been so many that I lost count. I had helped with the preparations for the birthday, as always. After that, I was herded back to my cupboard again, where I was supposed to stay for the entirety of the day.

At least, that was what was supposed to happen. I don't know if it was the curiosity, or just the longing of a little boy who had nothing, but I sneaked out when everybody was seated inside. The door was left open, if only a crack, and I was able to watch Dudley unwrap his presents. Most of the presents weren't even worth a second glance to my cousin. A few of them actually attracted a look of vague appreciation on Dudley's face. But his excitement clearly showed when he took the wrapping paper off of the cardboard box of the G.I. Joe. I've heard Dudley whine and whine, day in and out, about this toy. However, his excitement quickly turned to indignation and anger. His face quickly turned red in the impressive time-span of three seconds. The figure was lifted out of the box, but immediately it became obvious that it was far from a "Space Crusader". In fact, if you didn't know better, you could almost say that the doll Dudley held was a beautiful female puppet. The toy was quickly rejected and thrown away to the ground. My heart began to race. Would Dudley forget about throwing the toy to the ground? A childish, futile hope grew within me. But I stomped it down as quickly as it came up. Most of the toys Dudley didn't want were thrashed around. Who was to say he wouldn't stomp on it and throw it away?

I quickly realised the Dursleys were not going to be around much longer, what with Dudley's face ready to explode. So I quickly hid in my cupboard, hoping, but not daring, to believe the toy would be all right. I didn't feel the sense of loss and hopelessness that I normally felt when it was Dudley's birthday. There was no melancholy, and barely any bitter feelings. My only thoughts went out to the pretty doll, lying so broken and rejected on the ground.

After a while there was a lot of commotion, and the laughing voices of people leaving. When it quieted down, there were several brisk knocks on my door. "Be sure to clean everything up. We'll be back soon, so don't you dare try anything." And so even the Dursleys went away.

Opening my door a crack, I looked around to make sure there was no-one left behind. After I had ascertained that no-one was there, I opened the door to the living room, where my gaze was immediately drawn to the spot where the toy had been. However, it wasn't there. But I couldn't lift my hopes up yet. With dread, I walked to the back door and opened it, stepping through. The container was where it had always stood, though the distance felt a lot larger than usual. As I lifted my hand to lift the lid, I took a deep breath, before I pulled. Immediately I saw the delicate porcelain face staring up at me, with dirt all around and on it. But I felt relieved anyway, because it didn't look as if it had been broken in any kind of way.

I gently picked it up, patting away the dirt and grime, and peered at the porcelain face which was so close to mine. Looking left and right, I wondered if the Dursleys would be back soon. It was fun, talking to a doll. Something man-made could hardly make any crude remarks about me. I hurried back inside, fervently hoping they would never know I practically stole something of Dudley's, even though he threw it out himself. The Dursleys wouldn't even grant me a broken toy, let alone a doll which was in excellent state. As I neared my cupboard, I realised how hopeless the situation was. Aunt Petunia usually looked into my cupboard. But quickly my panic abated. I opened the door, and noticed the thing I was looking for. The only other thing I had ever been granted. In fact, the toy soldiers were only stored into the cupboard by Dudley. He had completely forgotten them. I think he wanted to frame me, by blaming me that I had stolen his soldiers. But I was grateful for them, and they could actually be put to good use. I placed the doll behind the toy soldiers, and quickly closed the cupboard.

Walking to the kitchen, an involuntary moan escaped my throat. This was going to be tough. The pile of dishes on the counter seemed to rise and rise before me…

Halfway through the cleaning, the Dursleys returned again. Dudley seemed ecstatic, and I knew he had finally received what he wanted for so long.

The "aren't you finished yet" was expected when they saw me still doing the dishes. I lowered my head and muttered a quick sorry. Always admit and submit. Those were the rules to living in this house if your name was Harry Potter, the unwanted child left behind by Lily and James Potter. The poor orphan, all by himself. It was something akin to a miracle the Dursleys even agreed to taking me in after my parents died. Soon even the dishes were done and vacuum cleaning was next. Excitement was already building in my body, and I struggled to keep the smile off of my face. The Dursleys were always suspicious of smiles.

I hurried to my cupboard when all of my chores were done, and I realised it was already late in the evening, as the sun had already set. I hardly dared to breathe as I pulled the cord to turn on the light bulb. But there he was, pale as the moonlight, sitting behind the toy soldiers, in a darkened corner. I brushed the soldiers aside, and gently scooped him up, before I nearly crushed him against my chest, the realisation sinking in that I had finally acquired something of my own. I murmured words I barely heard myself, before I held him before me at a distance, inspecting him thoroughly for the first time.

His face was of perfect porcelain, though there was a small hint of colour on the cheekbones. The lips were dark-pink, and nearly feminine. The eyes were grey, and they seemed to nearly glint in the scarce light, though they were more narrow than most doll eyes seemed to be. I could barely look at the face so different from my own. The nose, the lashes, the eyebrows… they were all perfectly shaped. Though I reckoned they had to be, since it was a doll, and dolls were perfect. Besides these features, he had blond hair, on the edge of white. The hands were small and delicate, though long-fingered.

I removed his clothes, to make sure all the dirt was properly shaken off, and nothing was left behind. The cloth body was pure white, untouched by the dirt. The arms and legs, made from the same material as the head, were unblemished, too. Both the feet and hands were extremely detailed, being no less than the head.

Grabbing a cloth, I began to wipe at the head, covered in dirt. Soon the dull shine returned to the face, and I breathed out a relieved sigh. My heart was pounding, though, as I realised what I had done, and what kind of consequences could await me. If any of the Dursleys found out, I'd be punished. And the doll would most probably end up in Dudley's grasp, where it would await a fate worse than death. Not wanting such a thing to happen, I placed the doll back on the shelf, tucking it away in the darkened corner. Placing the toy soldiers back, the doll boy was barely noticeable. My heart kept pounding when I thought of all the possibilities of the Dursleys finding out what happened. I snuck a quick last glance at the doll before I turned off the light, the small cupboard room turning into a dark hole, safe for the cracks which leaked light into the small space. Sighing, I lifted the covers and went to sleep.

A/N: I'm currently working on the next chapter, but sometimes even that might take an awful long time. I'm so sorry, guys!