Disclaimer: I still don't own To Aru, or Mikoto, or Touma, or the song Before I Let You Go by Freestyle. But I used Sarah Geronimo's version for the more upbeat note hahaha

Before I Let You Go

Mikoto hugged her legs to her chest, burying her face on her knees as she tried to make sense of what she had done.

She ran away. When she woke up beside Touma that morning, tangled under the sheets, the first thing she did was get dressed and leave. She almost didn't leave the note, not knowing what to say after what had happened between them that night.

Take care. She didn't know what possessed her to leave what was possibly the stupidest and most inappropriate message in the world when leaving after a one night stand—(though she didn't really want it to be one and she would actually enjoy anoth—shut up, brain). But she guessed that was the problem. She couldn't think.

She went back straight to her dorm only to find Alice who was about to leave for her class, and though the girl was almost late, it didn't stop Alice from asking her for details. But after she had explained to her friend what had happened—what she had done—Alice didn't waste time reprimanding her and telling her that 'no, you DO NOT just leave the guy you're in love with in bed after you hadsex with him!'.

She really didn't need Alice telling her that she messed up. She already felt bad enough as it was, but of course, feeling bad won't make things right, Alice had told her before leaving her in their dorm room so that she could think about what she had done.

She didn't know how long she'd been there but when she checked her phone for the time, she realized it was only four hours before his plane was set to leave.

She closed her eyes and buried her face in her arms. She didn't know what to do. Everything between them was just so messed up that she couldn't tell what was right or wrong anymore.

But as she thought about what happened last night, how his lips felt on hers and how his warmth embraced her, she knew what she shouldn't do.

She wasn't going to let them end the way they did three years ago.

–

Maybe it was wishful thinking, waiting for Mikoto to at least bid him goodbye at the airport, but it was hard not to feel that way. Touma knew that it was almost certain that she wouldn't come—especially not after what had happened the night before.

Although he knew that night had probably messed their relationship up beyond repair, he couldn't find it in himself to regret it. It had been like a dream; the way she gasped when his lips met her skin, her tight embrace as he moved inside her and the way she murmured his name like it was some prayer. It had been the best night of his life and the only regret he had was that it would probably the last he'd ever have with her.

When the announcement for his flight sounded overhead, he sighed and stood up, taking his luggage with him. He was about to head to the boarding area when he stopped, finding Mikoto standing a few meters in front of him.

She was panting lightly, and it didn't take him long to realize that she had rushed to the airport just to see him off. That knowledge made him smile, so unbelievably happy, even though this meeting would be nothing but goodbye.

He took a careful step towards her, almost afraid that she'd retreat, but when she didn't, he took another and another until she was just an arm's length from her. He didn't reach out to her, fearing that he might cross the line if he did. Instead, he murmured, almost breathlessly, "You came."

Sh smiled a little in return, nodding lightly. She met his eyes as she said, "I couldn't let this end the way it did three years ago... I'm better than that now."

His lip twitched just a little higher. "This?"

"Yes." She affirmed. "This. Us. I think we were both too immature and stupid to pick the right choice back then."

"True. Especially the stupid part. With me, that is." He joked, causing her to laugh a little. "This does seem a little like deja vu, only this time, I'm the one who's leaving."

"We just never seem to get it right, huh? First, we were too young, and now we got the timing all wrong." With her words, he realized that her decision hadn't changed, and even though he'd known it wouldn't, the fact that she came brought his hopes up a little. She must've noticed the change in his mood because she continued. "I'm still staying." She repeated, "But I won't let this end like this."

He waited for her explanation, wondering what exactly it was that she meant. When she averted her eyes and seemed to struggle for words, he prompted her, "End like what?"

"Like there's nothing between us," she met his eyes, "Like I don't care about you anymore, and before I let you go I..." she paused, taking his free hand and lacing her fingers with his, "I want to say I love you... I just realized I never really told you that."

He broke out into a grin, unable to contain his joy. He brought her hand up to his lips, kissing it lightly as he said, "I love you too... and I never realized that before either. I guess... I guess you never had to tell me, not when you didn't try to deny it even this past week. It would've been easier but... you didn't tell me you didn't, even when I asked you to."

She took her hand from him to pull him close and embrace him, and he took that chance to leave a kiss on her forehead. He held her tightly, savouring whatever limited moment they had with each other and memorizing the way she fit in her arms. He put his nose against her hair and inhaled her scent, tucking it into the very back of his mind so he wouldn't forget.

"What now?" he whispered, unwilling to let the moment end just yet.

Her arms tightened around him before she said, "Can you wait?" she asked hesitantly, "For me, I mean?"

"Of course," he replied, pushing her back a little so he could put his forehead against hers and meet her eyes. "I've waited three years... I can wait longer for you."

Her eyes began to water as she nodded. She closed her eyes and the tears ran down her cheeks. He wiped them away with his thumb before lifting her chin up so he could plant a soft kiss on her lips.

With the remaining warmth from her embrace, and her scent, and the touch of her lips with him, they parted with a promise of a future together.

Author's Notes:

I am ashamed. Here's the last chapter as promised but this could've been better... unfortunately I wasn't sad enough to write a chapter for this sad fic. I blame it on Steven Bomb. I've been fangirling the whole day. But alas! It is done! This... this angst is finally over! I don't wanna write angsty fics anymore! It drains the hell out of me XDDD by the way, i literally only proofread it once so there must be a lot of typos or wrong grammar here haha sorry...

I'm pretty glad I vamped the rating up to M last chapter because at least I can get away with some more things in this one hahaha I still don't know how to write smut so no, please don't make me write one. I'll be terrible at it. That or I'll die from embarrassment before I could finish. Maybe when i'm a hell lot older XD

well, I hope you guys at least enjoyed the ride? Even if this last chapter is probably not the best, I hope you weren't too disappointed XD and please don't ask for a sequel. You know I can't commit! haha but seriously though, I'm glad I'm done with this. I can finally focus on that other story I'm trying to write :DDD not sure when I'll post that (if i ever will) but hey, Rome wasn't built in a day, right? little steps

welp, I've got no more words to say I guess... again, i hope you at least liked this chapter. and if you liked this story and haven't read my others, go check it out on my profile! i have some stories I deem better than this... not just because of the angst buuuuut hahaha

I'll see you guys again soon! :D

~~61wisampa