A Life in the Sun

Prologue: The Unmaking

Hinata died in the third year of the Fourth Shinobi War, but it took two more years for her to actually stop breathing. By that time, Konoha was slowly pulling itself together as its inhabitants rebuilt what had been destroyed in the fighting. And by that time, Uchiha Sasuke had become a real contestant for Hokage, with enough support to rival Naruto.

He'd helped them win the war, had stood with Madara's blood staining his arms up to his elbows and declared himself the final Uchiha. Then gone on to help with the reconstruction, rekindling his friendship with Naruto and Sakura-san and settling himself comfortably into the rhythm of the village. And Hinata's admiration for her childhood's precious hero, her "Naruto-kun" faded into nothingess.

Because Naruto could forgive Sasuke the pain he'd caused him, both physical and mental, could forgive the last Uchiha's attempted assassination of Sakura-san and his returning to their village only with the intent to destroy it. Could forgive his madness and cruelty, say that the Uchiha had been confused, that he'd been twisted by Orochimaru and then by Madara. That the Cursed Seal of Heaven had forced him deeper into darkness than he'd meant to go. Pile one excuse on top of the other.

Hinata had never understood Naruto's bond to his teammates. The mean and spiteful fangirl Sakura. The cold and cruel Sasuke. Perhaps there had been warmth between the three of them, out of sight. Perhaps their bond had blossomed in shadow. And Sakura-san, at least, had grown beyond her petty childhood self, unfurled like the flower she was named after into someone worthy of respect. Sasuke had only descended into the darkness of his childhood until nothing else remained. There was weakness in allowing yourself to be consumed in such a way, Hinata had thought.

That hadn't mattered. Hinata cared little for Sakura, and if Naruto wanted to forgive his supposed best friend's decision to kill her, forgive the path of destruction he'd forged... it wasn't up to her to judge. Not her "Naruto-kun", who was always righteous and strong and just. And they were at war, in need of every strong fighter available, never mind if they had eyes as cold as a fish's.

And then in the third year of the war, Uchiha Sasuke had taken his sword and driven it cleanly into Kiba's back to get to Zetsu. And Naruto had forgiven that too. Called it a mistake. She'd seen the curse marks spread to cover the Uchiha's body, of course. But she'd also seen him let it do so. And for the first time in her life, Hinata had stood in judgment of her precious Naruto-kun - and found him wanting.

-.-.-.-

It had taken her two years to find a seal that would allow her to change it all. Two years, and a coldness that settled deep into her chest and that only her surviving teammate and sensei could penetrate. In hindsight, it'd been obvious that Kiba had been more than just a friend to her. That the reason she'd stopped watching Naruto so intently, stopped fainting and stuttering in his presence, was because her feelings had changed. And she hadn't realized that in time. Because Naruto had been more than just a crush: he'd been an ideal. And ideals, she'd realized, were a difficult intoxication to give up.

Had Hinata been someone else, she might have drank herself into a stupor at the understanding of what she'd allowed to go to waste. She didn't do that, though. Instead she knocked on Shino's door, and then knocked him into bed. Because he was Kiba's brother, even more than Hana-san had been their teammate's sister. Shino hadn't asked anything of her, not before and not after. He hadn't called her cruel for using him that way, though Hinata was sure he'd known the only warmth in her was spared for the one person she couldn't reach.

He deserved better. She never went to his bed again, and he never brought up their one encounter.

The day her preparations were complete, Hinata moved quietly into the great forest that surrounded their village. The leaves were turquoise and silver under the moonlight, and as she knelt in the circle of seals, Hinata was glad that she could leave in beauty.

With that thought still lingering, her breathing and heart stuttered to a halt.

A/N: I started writing this several months ago, and since I won't update any of my other stories until I've finished moving in February, I hoped this could tide you over. (A few AU/non-canon compliant details are present, I know.)

Hinata was always one of my least favorite characters in canon, in part because of her blind devotion to Naruto. Here I am attempting to write her as the kind of character I think the Fourth War and her crush's continuing obsession with the canon insane!criminal!Sasuke should have turned her into.

Do tell me your thoughts. What do you think of this Hinata? Of how she sees Naruto?