hey guys! This is just a oneshot/side project I've been working on since around last October. It's what I work would work on when I was chapter storied out. Plus I don't write the gotham gang enough!(No one does honestly...)

As always: I own nothing, like the bad witch I have no power here.

Anyway, I don't have much to say, I hope you enjoy it!

Alfred had always been concerned about Dick and his friends. Not that he didn't fully approve of his young charge's friends, they were delightful people. Very nice girls, but how Young Richard acted around them was troubling. The poor butler couldn't tell if the four of them were in some sort of polygamous relationship, had something purely platonic going on, or if Dick had dated one or all of them at a time and just switched around a lot. It was confusing, but he was going to figure it out: no one left Agent A out of the loop, not even Richard Grayson. Especially not Richard Grayson.

For weeks Alfred had watched the four teenagers go about their daily lives: both in and outside the Manor. He'd figured out almost exactly how they interacted, who they were, what part they played in the quartet of shenanigans. Essentially, he was able to figure out exactly what made Dick and His Girls properly function as a highly efficient quartet of tomfoolery and shenanigans.

Barbara Gordan: The Instigator

One of the most interesting facts Alfred had found in his vast study of the group of friends, was how influential Barbara (Babs) Gordan was on the other three teens. She had always seemed so quiet, very held together, someone who followed orders well and was just that: a follower. He was proven very wrong.

As he observed her inside the group, she was obviously the instigator; a leader of sorts. She often led the group into troubling situations or occasionally led them on the right path. Generally, it was the first. She managed to sway the other three with a few charged words and a bat of her red eyelashes.

It had been a normal day of school, all four teens had gone through their classes without issue nor complaint. Even at lunch, they ate rather normally, no messing around or pranks, or impromptu sing-a-longs involving Les Mis and several borrowed costumes from the theatre department. Today they sat, talked quietly among themselves and caused minimum trouble. Something was afoot.

The four met after school, lounging under one of the trees near the side lot. Artemis had been their ride to and from school for about the past four weeks, so they were free to stay as long as they wanted. Free, to do as they wanted. Or more as it would be, free to do as Barbara wanted.

Artemis and Dick were sitting side by side, their backs against the tree. Dick had his head resting in the crook of her neck and looked to be napping. Bette and Barbara were lounging on either side of the pair, their heads on the laps of their friends. The looked like A nice cozy group of friends, very cozy.

The resident ginger sat up, moving to sit in front of the other three. "So, my ladies and my Dickie-" both blondes in the group snickered; nudging the boy between them awake. "I bet you've been wondering why I gathered you all here-" blank faces met her words. "I want us, to go to our little Dickie's father's charity ball. I know at least Dick and I were invited, and we each are allowed to bring a guest. So my blonde bitches-"

Both blondes in question scowled, apparently that was a term of endearment they did not particularly care for.

Barbara ignored their glares, continuing on with her plan. "You are going to be our dates, or at least, Dick's date. Wouldn't want my dad thinking me a lesbian, couldn't have that. So I and Bette will attend as friends, and Dick and Artemis will be the cutest couple there!" she clapped her hands together, a devious grin upon her face.

"How come she gets Dick?" blurted out Bette, a pout on her face.

Artemis snickered. Clamping a hand over her own face so her laughter wasn't so apparent. "Bette, Bette, Bette, you always have been so desperate for the dick, no need to be jealous darling, besides, we're all well aware Dick and I are a much cuter couple then he and you will ever be." she laughed, throwing an arm around Dick. "Isn't that right Richard my main lover~"

He cackled, throwing his arms around her In return. "Of course 'Mis, LFL, lovers for life~" he could only grin as Bette pouted more and Barbara grinned, clapping. her face was filled the glee. The others; aside from stubborn ole Bette were playing into her hands perfectly.

"Good!" declared Barbara, standing and dragging Bette up with her. "now we go shopping! Since Artemis has absolutely nothing to wear, Bette and I love shopping, and we need our little man here to keep us safe through all the wondering hands you find in dress shops." 'Little man' seemed happy enough with the situation now, and everyone besides Artemis did as well.

"I have a dress-" whined Artemis defensively. "What I wore for homecoming! It was really nice, like sixty dollars-"

The other two girls laughed, Bette even so far as doubling over in hysterics. "That's rich Arty- no offense, but that dress was trash compared to what we need for the gala; dresses like that cost more than your apartment does."

Artemis pouted but slung her bag over her shoulder and stood. "Oh fine, where do you want to go then? Because I have no idea where any fancy shops are in this town..."

"Follow me~" chirped Barbara. She strolled over to Artemis's car, an old convertible the four of them had fixed up since apparently four people on a motorcycle was sort of illegal. She climbed in the middle seat in the front, with Dick scooting in what was technically shotgun next to her. Bette jumped in the back seat while Artemis was soon sitting in the driver's seat, starting the car.

"Alright Artemis, basically just drive straight down Main Street until you see the big glass building full of diamonds and huge as goodness wedding dresses. Hard to miss." The driver sighed and the four sat in silence as they went through Gotham until they reached what had to be the fanciest dress shop Artemis had ever seen.

The entered, and soon each girl was whisked away, stripped down to nearly nothing and they began the fitting process.

Artemis groaned, completely uncomfortable and unused to the rather hands on fitting approach used in the fancy dress shop. Why did she always end up listening to Barbara.

Artemis Crock: The Protector

This role In the group had been blatantly obvious to the butler as soon as he saw the four together. When they walked Artemis always brought up the rear, watching behind and the area of her friends. She was raised in the dirty part of Gotham and was often on edge. She was a careful girl.

Alfred was able to see right away how she fit into the group. She was the guardian angel, the protector, the fighter. He'd seen more then once that she would stand up to bullies, unfair teachers, sleaze, and even on one or more occasion robbers or riff-raff that showed up around Gotham Academy. She would do anything to defend her friends, even when she wasn't being a superhero: she acted as a hero. That's just how she rolled.

It wasn't often that the big time villains of the world dared to go after Gotham Academy. The school housed the children of the rich and well to do of the city, a perfect hub for ransoms, a nightmare for the punishments that followed. Gotta hate expensive lawyers. But alas it did happen from time to time. See, this brought up an issue for our quartet, Dick and Artemis were heroes, so sitting idly by and waiting for help was torture, Barbara(also part time hero) was the daughter of the police chief, and was very familiar with the scum of Gotham, she also had a hard time doing nothing...Bette...well, Bette just had life issue in dealing with people who were alright with killing a few people.

So when one day, conveniently during an assembly where the entire school was present(You just try to convince Artemis those creeps didn't have an inside source, because that was a battle you wouldn't win anytime soon) and The Joker and Scarecrow decide to show up and start stirring shit up. The little group is having none of it. Though Artemis is the only one allowed to show how plainly done she is with the world, coming from the 'slums' she can only be used to crime, so her only concern is for her 'rich friends' who are acting in complete terror. (Not that the situation wasn't a bit frightening and scary, they just...it wasn't the day to install real fear into these four quite yet...keyword yet).

The Joker's goons had been rounding up kids from a long list they'd been given and both Dick and Barbara had been dragged kicking and screaming to a group at the side of the room. This group was obviously the big money or big importance group. Artemis now clung to Bette, the only friend she had left standing with her. But as the rounds continued she was also grabbed for the group. Damn her family's money.

This left Artemis all alone, in the crowd of many of her other 'average' peers. Not only had she been left out and grouped with those boring normal people(So maybe this wasn't her biggest concern, but I feel for her) she wasn't able to help them.

She'd shoved her way up towards the front of the mass of regular students, crouching and crawling amongst their feet so the thugs wouldn't see a teen randomly putting themselves closer to danger, that would be idiotic. Finally she was on the edge, huddling and whimpering along with the other kids left on the outside, flinching back when the guards walked by, looking like your average terrified teen who got stuck on the outside next to the psychopaths.

The Joker was speaking to the group of 'high importance' teens, probably giving them instructions on how to get their parents to send him the money. She spotted Barbara, Bette and Dick, all huddled together in the back, hurriedly whispering amongst each other, probably trying to figure out how to help. To bad for them, Artemis was already on top of the whole 'rescue them and the entire school' issue.

Being the vain attention needing psycho he was, the Joker had several thugs filming the students, and himself as he spoke. She knew where he was, it was just the Scarecrow that Artemis was concerned about now. She didn't see him, which was what worried her. If he decided to get involved while she was initiating operation 'kamikaze fighter' things would go downhill quick and not work out so well for anyone. Then again, it wasn't really meant to work to well for her in the first place, hence the name... all she really needed to do was stall until Batman and the police could get in.. she just needed to be a distraction. And oh was she gonna put on a show.

She undid her already loose tie, slipping her jacket off of her shoulders. She left the jacket on the floor, and wrapped the tie around her hands, leaving it taught between her clenched fists. Artemis sighed, taking a deep breath, she was going to look like an idiot, but it was what had to be done. Lord hope Red Arrow never looked up her in the news after this, because her technique was going to be absolute crap.. oh well, she needed to look like an untrained street fighter from the bad side of town.

With a loud shriek Artemis ran full force through the thugs ahead of her, sprinting as fast as she could towards the Joker, a really dumb idea, but all she had. She sprung out of the way as thugs chased her, grimacing as she felt a bullet wiz bast her ear. FInally she was on her target, and in a split movement she had the tie pulled across the Joker's throat and she was standing behind him, pulling it back, in essence holding him hostage...sort of.

She found herself shaking, which added to the image of some kid who thought they could actually take on the Joker, but her fists were sure in holding the tie across his neck. "N-nobody move! Wouldn't want the man who throws you your paycheck to get hurt would you?" Her taunt was dumb, and that was the point. She couldn't look trained, just dumb and foolhardy. Desperate to live. "J-just let us go! Let the kids walk out!-"

The Joker was laughing wildly, his hands gripping at the tie as she pulled it harder against his throat. "This kid's got guts! This is more fun than I get from Batsy most of the time!" He fell into another fit of hysterics, but this only helped to unnerve Artemis more. She was biting her lower lip, glancing around quite frantically at the thugs and the students, searching for Scarecrow. He was around somewhere, somewhere she wasn't looking...

"I'd let the clown go if I were you.." rasped a low voice, coming from the only place she couldn't see. Directly behind her. Great.

Artemis whimpered, now not really having to act like she was worried. "Not until you l-let the rest of the s-students out.."

"Bank account check?" Demanded Joker, moving to wipe a tear from his eye as he stopped laughing. A thug on a laptop gave him the thumbs up. "Well then, looks like we got what we need! Send the kiddies out-"

Artemis sighed in relief, watching as the thugs ushered all the children out, including Dick, Barbara and Bette, who shot her worried looks as they left. Soon it was just her(still shakily 'threatening' the Joker) a bunch of thugs with guns, and Scarecrow standing behind her, his breath on her neck.

"Now that we got the cash, we can do what we want. And that means taking you out, not like you have any rich parents we need in the future considering where you ran from like that.. Hey Scarecrow- why not let our little friend here see what makes you so scary?" The Joker cackled and Artemis dropped the tie, spinning on her heel to run only to have her shoulder grabbed by the now free clown. He spun her around putting her face to face with Scarecrow. She moved to punch at the villain, but a needle slid into her shoulder, pushing what could be assumed as Scarecrow's new serum into her bloodstream.

As the fluid mixed into her blood her pupils dilated. She shrieked, her hands coming up to cover her ears. She sank to her knees, the Joker laughing hysterically as she screamed in terror, seeing things unseen to either villain.

Moments later, Batman, Robin and Batgirl would bust in, taking out the thugs with ease as the Gotham P.D. rushed in, soon both villains and all the thugs were in cuffs and headed to their respective prisons.

Artemis was curled up on the ground, hyperventilating. Her eyes were wide open, unblinking with tears streaming down her face as she muttered unintelligible things to the unseen terrors she was being tormented by. The three Bats had grabbed her, bringing her back to the Batcave.

Alfred had made the executive decision to sedate her, so they could figure out an antidote without having to watch her be in so much pain. In no time, they'd given her the cure and she was awake and attempting to explain to Bruce her reasoning behind 'operation kamikaze fighter'. She was still curled up, her chin resting on her knees as she attempted to justify her actions, even if they were stupid. "I just..I just wanted to get them out of there.." Soon Bruce had relented and let the other three teens in to harass her about stupidity. Though all three knew she'd done it for them.

Bette Kane: The Glue

Bette, though a bit ditzy at times was quite possibly the most important factor of the group. She was gullible, lovable, charming and a flirt. She had a beauty queen smile, and could challenge the Queen of England in grace and diplomacy. A leading member of student council Bette had it all, and knew how to use it.

As his observations went on, Alfred noticed how altercations caused stress amongst the group. Arguments over money and payment, blame for failed projects, dismissive comments about life issues. If anything could be said it was that the four teens were in a constant state of tension, that is, when Bette wasn't around. She had this magical ability to help the quartet mesh and perform flawlessly in public and in private. She was most assuredly the glue.

One one particularly dreary afternoon the four found themselves sitting around the dinning room table of Wayne Manor, books and papers scattered across the table. Artemis was chewing the end of a pencil, her brow furrowed in thought as she read through a particularly old book, Dick and Bette were leaning back in their chairs, looking quite relaxed as they threw a wadded up piece of paper between them over the table, Barbara was staring aimlessly at the wall opposite her, a pen tapping against her temple as her lips moved in a silent process of putting ideas into words.

"So do you think Bruce would take us over to Arkham to do some research, since like, that's what our project's on?" mused Bette as she tossed the paper wad at Dick's head.

Barbara shot her an incredulous look. "Not likely, besides, as if any of our parents would let us go there! We have decent guardians, duh."

Artemis sunk down in her chair a bit, now chewing her lower lip as she continued to read through her book, occasionally jotting down some notes on a pad of paper. Her foot began tapping softly on the pristine wooden floor of the dining room, causing a dull echo.

"I just thought it would be a good thing to go there you know, get a grasp on the Asylum in modern times.. But yeah, I see where that would cause an issue... " Bette shrugged, turning to glance at her fellow blonde quizzically. "Arty, you wanna say something? You're doing the thing you do when you want to say something that's gonna get you in trouble..."

Dick rolled his eyes. "Bette, Artemis does not have a 'thing' that's what she looks like when she's working..." he took a second glance at the girl in question, who was glancing between the three with an awkward air between them. "Or maybe not..."

Artemis cleared her throat, sitting back up in her chair, though her shoulders were still slightly slumped. "My uh..dad got some custody trial started the other week, which isn't important, but well.. he's doing archive work at Arkham as something for probation or something or other..but he wants me to go there and help him to get the five hours a week in he gets for visiting or whatever... but every time is when we're scheduled to work on the project for the next like...two weeks..."

"Blow him off-" supplied Barbara with a shrug. "I may not know the full situation, but form what you said and you've said before, he sounds like a scumbag who doesn't deserve five minutes of your time, let alone five hours a week. Besides, this project is really important for our grade in History...we need you!"

Dick nodded. "Babs is right, we need you more here than he does there. Besides, the archives won't even help our research since that's all modern and files on inmates, not stuff you can bring out for a project..."

Artemis sighed, her foot tapping growing slightly more insistent. "When I brought it up I didn't say it was up for discussion, all I'm saying is I'll do my part on my own and get it done...besides, I don't see anything wrong with going to Arkham, it's for school..that's not bad parenting..."

Bette glanced between the two 'sides' a frown slipping onto her face as the conversation unfolded.

"Of course it's bad parenting, they're dangerous, no parent would put a kid near that willingly..." Barbara scowled slightly. "And don't you think we should at least try to set up new times for getting your part looked over? We have to make sure it all flows..."

"One, parenting on the good or bad scale is all perspective, so you should probably be a little more inclusive with all that Little Miss Future Psych Degree." Artemis narrowed her eyes. "What is that supposed to mean anyway? Do you not trust me to do my part well enough? I don't need you monitoring my work, thank you very much. Oh, an if you're insinuate-"

"Alright-" declared Bette, halting the argument before it could get too heated. "Arty, I'm sure Babs was just concerned for you being there all that time. Plus you know she's bee up till like three in the morning writing that paper all week. She's just tired.. Besides, O think I speak for all of us when I say that it'll be fine of you miss any practices Artemis.. You do great work in history, heck I admit to using you for test copying basis instead of Dick. I'm sure it'll all work out great." during her little speech both other girls had seemed to cool down. Soon the group returned to their work..or in Bette's and Dicks case, their not work.

Bette nudged Dick from under the table with her foot. "Hey Dicky, you know how much I love you guys?"

The boy snickered. "I can only guess Bettey-kins."

"A whole lot more than Alfred loves the Queen!~"

Richard Grayson: The Pimp Daddy

As much as Alfred hated to admit it, but as Dick got older he was following flawlessly in his father's footsteps. He was suave, good looking and he knew it. He was also completely willing to flaunt and use his wealth when it benefited he and his girls. The boy was going to be one heck of a lady's man one day. If his girls ever let him go that is.

He'd always been generous in his gifts to the three ladies. Jewelry, dresses, expensive dinners, the occasional payment for a car or if rent was due early. He loved to spend on his girls, almost as much as he loved to love on his girls.

Dick smirked as he strolled past one of the mirrored trophy cases of the school. He'd finally filled out and up a bit, as a junior he was now taller than all of his girls and puberty hadn't made him too hard on the eyes either. So as he waited outside the class he knew all three of the girls were in(God bless Barbara's ability to glide through AP Calc the same hours the seniors were taking it), he couldn't help but chuckle as some of the freshman girls blushed and giggled as they scurried past.

Soon the class flooded out, Artemis, Bette, and Barbara taking up the rear. THey grinned at their 'little man' before bursting out laughing.

"Man Grayson, could you get any more seductive? I don't think the female population's overies can handle it much longer~" teased Artemis as the four fell in step to leave the school.

" 'Mis, you're just jealous that I still wink at those girls, you don't get winks any more. That goes for all of you." He pointed a warning finger at the three, chuckling as they rolled their eyes.

Bette scoffed, her loud laugh breaking the peace of the nearly empty halls. "Right Dick, we so miss your charming little winks, you must have forgotten you began paying us in kisses like a year ago. Right about the time your height came in..."

Barbara and Artemis couldn't help but snicker at this, but Dick was undeterred. "A special payment for my special girls, isn't that right?"

Soon the group had made their way to Artemis's now worn convertible, piling in they awaited Dick's 'announcement' that he demanded be made in the car. "Spill the beans Dick, what's up?" asked Barbara, voicing the question all three girls were thinking.

"Well.." he grinned, pausing for 'dramatic effect' or something. "Bruce finally caved and let me buy my own apartment over in Bludhaven, so now we have someplace to crash and hang out on our own you know...isn't that awesome?" Dick beamed proudly, leaning back in his seat arms crossed behind his neck.

"You're 17, is that even legal.. Not to rain on your parade, it's totally cool that you have your own place now!" Artemis smiled reassuringly at him. Vain as he may be, sometimes his ego needed a bit of humoring.

"Of course it's fine...otherwise I wouldn't have it! Now start driving to Bludhaven Woman, we have a housewarming party to get ready for!"

"By housewarming party do you mean an actually party or do you mean the four of us hanging out on your new couch?" asked Bette with a giggle.

"I'd say the later.." piped up Barbara as Artemis started pulling out of the school parking lot and began taking the correct turns to get out of Gotham and go to Dick's new pad.

Dick shrugged. "So it may just be us, but we're one heck of a party I'd say. I enjoy us."

"We enjoy us too Grayson, calm down. They're only teasing you and your new life's joy." Artemis grabbed some sunglasses out of the cup holder, sliding them on as they passed out of city limits and onto the straight pass to Bludhaven.

"Oh please, it's obvious you guys are my life's joy, the apartment is just a pleasantry for all of us to enjoy!" He turned to grin at Barbara and Bette. "You should know that by now."

"By god Richard Grayson, when did you get so charming? girls our little boy is growing up so fast!~" Bette giggled as she spoke, leaning no Barbara for support, though the ginger only nodded in agreement while Artemis held in a snicker.

"Alright, I'm gonna need specific directions now Dick, where's this apartment of yours at hmm?" Artemis glanced at him out of the corner of her eye before turnign back completely to the road.

"First right after the police station onto Lincoln Street, then a left after the corner store." He glanced around their surroundings, his grin widening as they approached their destination. "Alright, it's the apartment complex to the left, the big dark building with lots of glass. You can park right there in front of that sign-"

Artemis followed his directions and soon the three were following Dick past the doorman and up to the highest floor. Bette gave a low whistle. "Damn Dick, you never said it was penthouse, that's bound to be nice..."

"Oh it is~" He grinned, pulling out his key and unlocking the door. He opened it and stepped inside, allowing his girls to follow him in. "Home sweet home ladies!"

The three took in the glorious sight in front of them, the apartment was absolutely perfect. Dick looked like a proud parent and the girls could only nod approvingly. "It's great, I like it...swanky!~" managed Bette finally.

"Oh please, you guys haven't even seen the bedroom yet!"

"Aren't you the charmer Grayson." Chuckled Artemis. "All three in one fowl swoop."

He smirked. "Wouldn't be the first time and you know it 'Mis, and it certainly won't be the last if I get my way."

I really hope you enjoyed it! Reviews would be so greatly appreciated you have no idea! Tell me what you think of these one shots and the gotham gang- More? Less? Like this bunch of nerds? Thanks for reading! Also.

I've noticed I have a problem... Goodness do I overuse line breaks...oh well~

~GettingTraught