The staff luncheon is planned in a banquet room for a nondescript government division. MI6 staff are not happy that it is Mr. Mallory that is hosting the event.

Malloy is attempting to ingratiate himself with the staff at MI6 after taking over while M recovered from the gunshot wound sustained at Skyfall. Mallory knows that M thinks he is trying to take her job so he invites them as a peace-offering.

David, Mallory's personal secretary knows that M can be a defensive bitchy handful on a good day. David's solution is to spike the punch with…well a lot of vodka.

Bond enters with the rest of the staff. In total the staff includes 25 agents and analysts including the head office. M, Q, Moneypenny and Mr. Tanner are at the head table with Mallory and his secretary.

Bond does not like the idea of even being here but as he was not on a mission and M commanded his attendance he sits beside her with Mallory across from them.

Lunch is served and drinks delivered. Bond knows that M has a strict no more than two drinks at a function rule and she quickly meets that limit. All to the amusement of Bond and Tanner who are watching her glare at Mallory across the table.

Punch is then delivered to everyone at the table. Bond takes a sip and raises his eyebrow at Mallory who smirks back at him. Before Bond has a chance to warn her, M drinks her entire glass and begins sparing with Mallory.

"I really want to know why we are here Mr. Mallory. This is a waste of government resources and my staff's time."

"Everyone needs a break now and then M and you have recovered from a serious injury. I also wanted to thank your staff for being accommodating to me while I covered for you after Skyfall."

"No ulterior motives then?"

"None Ma'am. I have never had the pleasure of your company for very long and you're usually extremely pissed or defensive around me. I did not think that you would accept a private date invitation from me so this is my solution."

Mallory drinks a couple of beer with lunch and the wait staff then provides all the guests with punch. It tastes of vodka but as he is in a celebratory mood he enjoys his. As he begins to relax he notices the volume has increased and raucous laughter has begun.

Some of the staff pushed their tables against the wall and are creating a dance floor in the middle of the hall.

Someone from Q branch hijack the audio system and begins playing their iPod. The latest dance music suddenly blares to life.

Bond walks over and gives the man a glare and reduces the volume. Other obviously tipsy members of Q branch begin repositioning the speakers to localize the music to the just created dance floor.

Q himself is attempting to great a sound barrier with furniture and has enlisted the help of Moneypenny and Tanner.

Bond notices that Tanner and Moneypenny are standing very close and keep accidentally bumping into each other. This makes him smile.

Q and a very cute little blonde woman from his branch are leaning into each other and talking about how to use sound buffers.

The blonde convinces Q that experimentation is required, so they hit the dance floor with the rest of the increasingly relaxed staff.

Bond walks around observing the various hilarity going on with the MI6 staff.

Bond heads back out to the head table to see Mallory standing behind M giving her a shoulder rub. What the hell!

Mallory looks up from working the knots out of M's shoulders to see Bond with a face like thunder walking towards them. Mallory realizes Bond's alcohol immunity is likely double the norm and he just got caught with his hands all over the cookie jar.

Bond is very protective of M and Mallory knows he finds him a threat to her. Mallory raises his hands in surrender and sits down in Tanner's vacated chair beside a smiling relaxed M. Bond can see three empty punch glasses in front of M and two in front of Mallory.

The man is trying to get her pissed drunk…what the...

M has a huge smile on her face and she keeps laughing and playfully hitting Mallory's arm.

"Ma'am I think I should get you out of here now."

"Why Bond? Things are going so much better than expected."

M gazes coquettishly at Mallory and Bond pulls her seat out and takes her arm.

"I don't want to go 007 and you can't make me!"

Bond does not want to create a scene but does want to get M away from Mallory.

"I just want to take you to the dance floor M."

"Oh…alright then, let's go cut a rug James."

Now M is pulling him along to join the drunk crew out on the dance floor. As they pass the Q created sound zone they see the tech crew from Q branch have created a colourful light show with someone's laptop and they have enlisted a DJ from god knows where.

Ties are loose and a few tied around foreheads and other body parts. Moneypenny and Tanner are slow dancing to a fast song oblivious to the rest of the group.

M frowns at the music. "How can anyone dance to such songs. I mean in our day you actually danced proper steps…Bond change the music."

Bond rolled his eyes at the imperialistic demands of their tiny powerhouse of a boss. She was long past the arguing stage but not pass the stage where she could embarrass herself.

This was likely Mallory's plan all along. Bond asked the DJ to play something from the 60's or 70's for M to dance to.

When Bond turns around M is in the arms of Mallory dancing around the floor. James notices Mallory's staff bringing everyone more drinks.

Bond takes one and has a gulp just to deal with all this craziness. He is starting to feel left out and downright responsible in this mess of MI6 drunkenness. This is just wrong on so many levels.

M has her hands on Mallory's bum as they dance around the floor. Mallory is enjoying this far too much for Bond's liking.

Bond walks behind Mallory and taps his shoulder. "I believe I asked the lady to dance first, Mr. Mallory."

Mallory winked at M. "May I have another dance later M?"

M smiles at him. "Of course if you think you can keep up Mallory."

M's words are becoming more slurred as she takes another drink of punch. Bond takes the glass from her hand. "I think you've had enough punch ma'am. You're drunk."

"I am not!"

"Yes you are."

"No I'm not!"

"If you're not drunk then why are you getting along with Mallory and grabbing his ass?"

"I…I don't know…it just felt good…so I did it…Bond you are always doing things because they feel good why can't I?"

"Because you are the boss and above that sort of thing."

"So men can get drunk and grabs my ass...and have...but thats fine...but not me…story of my life…just a woman…a short bossy bitch…must be more proper than her majesty, herself...really...totally unfair...objectification...bloody men."

"I am not going to have a battle of the sexes with you now M. I think I should take you home."

"What about everyone else…who is going to take the party people out of here…Hahaha Tanner and Eve are making out over there."

Bond is holding M as they turn around the dance floor but he sees the two love birds and rolls his eyes.

Bond waves over the wait staff as he finds a chair to deposit M in for a second.

"I want you to send your manager to me now."

The manager arrives at the scene of the crime with a perplexed look on his face.

"What is going on here? I thought this was a luncheon not a Christmas party."

"The spiked punch has a lot to do with it. Listen carefully I want you to order vans to take all these people home…no one drives and clear the place by 5. Oh and I want all the security feeds sent to this address." Bond hands him a card.

The man nods in understanding and goes to arrange the transpiration for 25 drunk employees.

Bond turns back to find M missing again. Christ… it's like looking after a drunk teenager at her first party.

Bond breaks Tanner and Eve apart long enough to ask them if they have seen M... Of course they haven't...arghh.

Bond asks Q who is about to show his breakdancing ability to his staff that is cheering him on. No, he has not seen her but his little blonde friend speaks up. "I saw her head over there with Mr. Mallory."

Damn him! Bond pushes his way forcefully through the dancers and spectators out of the wall of sound area towards the head table.

They aren't there…where in hell?

Bond moves towards the toilets and finds them on a chez…but not how he would ever have expected.

M was sitting on Mallory's lap with her arms around his neck. Mallory is whispering to her or nipping at her ear lobe and his hand are holding her in place. One of his hands starts to slide up her side.

Bond yells. "Oi! What do you think you're doing!"

Mallory raises his hands up and stands suddenly, forgetting the woman in his lap as M gets dumped to the floor laughing.

Bond pins Mallory up against the wall with his arm against his throat with a murderous look on his face.

"What do you think you are doing…I know you spiked the punch Mallory. Trying to get her drunk to disgrace her?"

"No…I never. I did realize it was spiked but then we were getting along so well…she's very sexy for a woman her age…"

"Enough Mallory…I could kill you for this!"

"Not without my order 00 whatever number…now release him...now"

M was now standing beside them.

"But, M?"

"No buts...let him go."

"M the alcoholic punch is gone so everyone should start to sober up eventually. Hopefully no one feels too embarrassed by their activities today."

Bond looks pointedly at M and back at Mallory.

"Why should I be embarrassed? Life is too damn short..you should know...like me...and getting along...with someone once...relaxed enough to get to know…Gareth and I have come to an understanding…we...can and will work together...than before...better." M winks at Mallory.

Mallory spoke up still slurring a bit. "I enjoy her company to a greater level…than I thought I could and I…great deal respect…honesstt."

"Alright, I accept that but I think I should get you home now M. I have made arrangement with the staff and vans will be arriving to take everyone home later. I am sober enough to drive you home."

"Bond…never expected you to be a party pooper… I go when I want to go and now... I want to dance some more…come on boys…race you."

M suddenly darts off back towards the Q division's rave in progress.

Bond looks at Mallory who is smiling after M's retreating form. "What do you think you're doing with M, Mallory?"

"I think I told you already Bond…we're bonding…get it…haha."

"Bonding does not mean you get to put your hands all over her and bite her ear lobe."

"I wanted to snuggle with her Bond and she did not object. Your just jealous it wasn't you she got cuddly with."

If looks could kill Mallory would be attending his own wake right now.

Mallory smirked, pointing his finger into Bond's chest. "Admit it...you have a thing for M too."

"I will not admit it to YOU. You may use it against me and her later if I do."

The two men weave though some people milling about looking for food and more drink.

Bond says to Mallory. "Do you think you can get them to bring out more food and non-alcoholic beverages."

Mallory nods and uses his phone to contact David. "Done…do you think anyone will make it back to the office?"

"No. I think it is a safe bet to assume that this weekend has begun early."

They suddenly hear silence and catcalls coming from the dance zone. Oh no. What is M doing now!

Mallory and Bond arrive to see a small stage has been rigged and M is atop with a microphone about to engage in karaoke. The audience is cheering her on as the jazz melody of La Vie en Rose envelopes the room.

Bond and Mallory just look at each other with mouths slightly agape.

"Damn…she's amazing." One of Q's minions says from in front of Bond and Mallory.

Bond has to agree. M has a beautifully soulful voice.

Mallory is smiling. "Damn she's sexy as…."

Bond silences him with a glare but cannot help but agree. Tanner and Eve have stopped their attempt to get kissing as an olympic sport. They come to stand beside Bond and Mallory to watch M's performance.

Tanner smiles as he watches M nail the song like a pro.

Eve laughs. "Is there anything that woman can't do?"

The song ends with thunderous applause and calls of encore…encore.

M climbs down off the small stage and heads to Mallory and Bond as the music begins again.

Some begin to let loose on the dance floor but others head for the buffet that the staff has just announced.

"So who gets the next dance boys?" M says with a sexy wink.

Bond grabs her hand before Mallory can reach her. "M I think you should let me take you home. After this dance that is."

They start dancing beside Tanner, Eve, Q and the small blonde woman. Everyone with blissful alcohol induced smiles on their faces.

M smiles up at him. "What would I do without you to look after me, my dear boy?"

Bond smiles back at her "After the amount of times you have looked after me…I likely still owe you…I love you M."

M looks up at Bond with a shocked expression. "I may be tipsy Bond, but I'm not deaf dear boy, I heard that!"

Bond pulls her into an embrace. "Good."

Mallory comes up with a tray of drinks for everyone. They all take one last glass of punch and Mallory makes a toast.

"To MI6 and early weekends. CHEERS!"