After Action

By Kadi

Rated T

Disclaimer: It's not my sandbox, but I do love it so!

A/N: Post S2 E18: Return to Sender Part 1. SPOILERS AHEAD!

If Rusty has to move temporarily… what about Sharon? I think she could use some looking after also! I thought the episode ended a few minutes prematurely. This is a one-shot addition that popped into my head last night, and falls in line with what I think, or rather, what I hope is going on behind the scenes between Andy and Sharon - weddings? Ballet? Really? I've chosen to read the happy "shippy" goodness between those lines!

"But… I want to stay with you." Rusty turned, and his hands itched with the temptation to reach out and cling to her. He would do anything, promise anything, if he could just stay with Sharon. He didn't mean to sound ungrateful, but the threat of tears still stung at his eyes, aching and moist. He had to blink several times or else he was going to start crying, and he almost didn't care about that. Not with the sharp ache that was trying to drill a hole right through his chest and stomach. "Sharon, I swear, that will never happen again. I'll do whatever I have to…"

"Rusty." From behind him she saw Lieutenant Provenza smile grimly. Detective Sanchez gave the boy a sympathetic look. Neither man left the room. They had their orders. "Rusty," Sharon reached out and grasped his arm. "I'm not sending you away, honey. Once that trial is over you are coming right back here." She pointed at the floor beneath their feet to emphasize her point. "This is only temporary. I have to keep you safe. Do you understand? Everything that happened is my fault. My responsibility." He looked down and she gripped his chin lightly, lifting his gaze back to hers. "I should have listened to my instincts and I didn't. I'm not making that mistake again. You will stay with Lieutenant Provenza until after the trial. And… Rusty…" She smiled at him. It hurt to do it. Every muscle in her body ached with the force of keeping herself relaxed. "You're going to see me every day. Every day. Okay?"

He nodded. Rusty didn't speak, he couldn't. If he spoke, he'd say too much, and at the moment he was trying very hard to not turn into a sobbing child. That's all he wanted to do, really, because no one had ever protected him the way that Sharon did. With her he was safe. With her, he was home. Rusty's eyes widened with the realization of why everything had freaked him out so much. Now that the choice was taken from her, he understood everything. Given the choice, he would stay. He wouldn't leave.

Rusty opened his mouth to speak, but closed it again and looked down. The lump in his throat was too large, ached too badly for him to make any sound. He cast a single, desperate look around the room. He wanted to believe that he would see it again. He watched Sharon opening drawers, pulling out clothes, and packing the back quickly, efficiently. It wasn't that big of a bag, but she managed to somehow fit more into it than he thought possible. Whenever he thought about speaking, the only thing that came to mind was begging her to not send him away, so Rusty watched, and he said nothing.

"Why don't you see if there's anything on the shelf that you'd like to take," Sharon closed the lid on the bag and zipped it closed. Then she reached into the closet and pulled out a smaller, overnight bag. "I'll get your suit out of the front closet. It's hanging with the rest of the dry cleaning." It was an excuse, really. It was becoming harder to breathe, and in another few seconds she was going to halt the entire thing, tell Taylor where to stuff it, Provenza where to put his bright ideas, and keep Rusty with her where he belonged. Except that she hadn't kept him safe, she might have saved his life in the end, but it should never have gotten that far.

Sharon strode down the hall, when she reached the living room her steps faltered and she nearly tripped. Of course. When she saw the lone figure standing in her living room, keeping watch near the sofa, she should have realized he would be there. Sharon held his gaze, and when he made to take a step forward, she held up a hand and shook her head. Her body tensed and she looked away. She had to steel herself against the emotion brimming just beneath the surface. She inhaled deeply, and forced it out, slowly. When she felt she had at least some measure of control again, she walked to the closet just opposite her front door and opened it.

Rusty's suit was hanging there, with the other dry cleaning that she had yet to put away. Sharon pulled it out and when she turned, heard Provenza coming down the hall. He was still chatting at Rusty, far too bright and cheerful for either of them, but the effort was appreciated. She managed a small, wan smile when he rounded the corner and caught her gaze. The sympathy in his eyes was almost too much, but at least he understood. No matter the personal feelings involved, Rusty's safety came first. Sharon saw Rusty appear, just behind the Lieutenant, looking completely miserable. Her heart ached, just a little more, with every beat and every step closer he made toward the door.

"I'll take that ma'am," Sanchez walked around them and took the suit. He would be keeping an eye on both Provenza and Rusty.

"Thank you, Detective." Sharon spoke quietly. He slipped outside the condo to wait with the officers outside. Two of them would stay with her, the others would follow Rusty and the other two members of her team to the Lieutenant's house. Sharon tilted her head at Rusty and smiled sadly. "It really is temporary, I promise."

"I just…" Rusty bit the inside of his lip hard and tried again. "I just feel like if I go now, I won't ever see you again."

"You'll be seeing me in the morning." Sharon reached for him, and that he curled an arm around her, while holding onto his bags with the other, was telling. It was the second time in the same evening that he let himself be held. The first he had initiated, mostly, but Rusty wasn't usually comfortable with physical contact. She knew that she could probably count on one hand the number of times he had ever, actually, allowed her to hug him. Now he was clinging, and the grip he had on her waist was almost painful. "I'll be seeing you for breakfast," Sharon said. "I'll even stop and get those terrible egg burritos you like so much."

Rusty leaned back from her and swiped furiously at his eyes with his sleeve. "You hate those. I thought they were empty calories and way too spicy for the first meal of the day."

"I still think that." She forced a smile. "But you like them. Tell Lieutenant Provenza to stop for coffee and I will bring the burritos, and we'll pig out in my office on empty calories tomorrow morning."

He drew breath that shook too much for his liking. "Okay." Rusty would believe her, because Sharon didn't break her promises. Not unless she had to, and she always told him before hand. "Breakfast."

"Good." Her smile brightened, less forced but still painful. "Now, it's late, and you've had a very long day. I want you to go with Lieutenant Provenza and Detective Sanchez. Do everything that they tell you. Understood?"

"Yes." He started to walk toward the door but stopped, suddenly feeling oddly panicky. "But… What about you?" Rusty's eyes widened and he looked around the room. "Sharon, what if he comes back."

"It's okay, kid." Andy stood with his hands in his pockets, watching the exchange. He was mostly watching Sharon, and more than a little amazed at how well she kept it together. He wasn't sure he'd be able to do the same thing. "I've got eyes on the Captain. Nothing is going to happen to her." He might shake her a little bit for scaring the hell out of him earlier that day, but he was still debating it.

"See." Sharon reached out and squeezed Rusty's arm. "I am well taken care of. I'll have two uniforms, and Lieutenant Flynn. Not to mention, I am armed Rusty."

"Think of today as a fluke," Provenza stated. "We've seen her shoot. She doesn't miss. Remind us to show you the squad car video sometime of the guy she shot between the eyes with a bean bag gun."

"Bean bag gun?" Rusty didn't look convinced. He didn't much feel it either. "You're kidding right."

"Nope." Flynn grinned. "Half the squad fell in love with her that day. I still have the bag in my desk."

Provenza nudged Rusty with the back of his hand and snorted. "Doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out which half. Rusty, it's going to be okay. Come on, you'll see."

"Right." It was hard to believe them, especially with how close his stalker had gotten that afternoon, but maybe that was the whole point of everything. "I just wish it felt okay."

"It will." The older Lieutenant shrugged. "Sooner than you think. Now, let's get you to my place, and we'll see about dinner. Something completely unhealthy that this one," he hooked a thumb at the Captain, "would never approve of." Sensing that if he didn't take Rusty now, he might be able to, Provenza prodded the boy toward the door. After he stepped through, to where Sanchez and their guard were waiting, he looked back. He gave the Captain one last, reassuring look and pulled the door closed behind him.

It took seventeen seconds to walk to the elevator. Sharon counted them out in her head while she turned slowly in the living room. It already felt strangely empty. It took another ninety seconds for the elevator to rise. She closed her eyes and held up a hand when she felt the air in the room shift and realized that Flynn had taken a step forward. She was breathing slowly, in and out. Her jaw clenched tightly.

When she counted ninety-eight seconds and her door had not reopened, Sharon bent forward at the waist and made a low keening sound. The pressure had built to a near paralyzing level and the effort of holding it in too painful for simple words. Air rushed out of her lungs, while her knees buckled. She expected to feel the floor beneath her, and would have gladly welcomed its solid presence in a world that was falling down around her, but found herself lifted instead.

She was shaking. Even before started to collapse. She was waiting, giving Rusty time to elude his companions, and when it was obvious that he wouldn't, she crumbled completely. But before that, she was shaking, swaying on her feet and scarcely holding it together. Andy was ready when it came, and caught her before she could sink completely to her knees. He drew her up against him and curled an arm around her waist. Limp and trembling, she seemed to fold into him, and he bent, sliding an arm beneath her knees to lift her completely.

Andy scanned the room quickly and stepping between furniture, he sank onto the sofa with her cradled against him. Her nails were painful, biting into his skin where she clasped his shirt in her fists and held on. Aside from that one, pain filled sound, she was silent while she wept. Had he not felt the heat and dampness of her tears, wetting his shirt, he might not have known the trembling creature in his arms was crying. He curled a hand into her hair and his fingers rubbed her scalp, while his other hand rubbed her back.

He didn't speak, there was nothing that he could say that would make the situation less painful. In the end, she was forced to do the last thing she wanted. She broke the one promise she worked hardest to keep. She sent the boy away. He wondered if Rusty would ever really know just how lucky he really was, or how loved.

Andy didn't want to disturb her. He ached with her, and for her, and each shuddering gasp, each hitch in her breath made his heart clench painfully. They couldn't stay, however, and just as Rusty had packed to leave, Sharon needed to do the same. They weren't allowing either of them to stay in the condo. It was too dangerous. Until the stalker was caught, neither Rusty nor Sharon was safe in the condo. Especially now that she had interrupted him. The odds were he would escalate, and he would come for her first. Even if the plan didn't call for vacating the condo until the suspect was caught, Andy had no intention of leaving her there alone.

"Sharon." His lips were soft against her hair. His mouth moved gently against her temple, and the dampness of her cheek. "We need to get you out of here." His hand moved from her back to tip her chin up. His other still cradled the back of her head. Her eyes were red, and the pain in them made his own breath hitch. "You need to pack." His thumb swept first one cheek, and then the other.

She nodded quietly, but instead of sliding off of his lap, she pushed her face into his neck instead. Her arms curled around his neck and shoulders. Sharon held on tightly, while a tremor worked its way down her spine. She was no longer crying, but she continued to breath slowly, with the occasional hitch, or sniffle. When she spoke, it was in a low, thick voice. "I almost got him killed."

"No." Andy frowned. He pressed her back and held his shoulders while he looked up at her. "Sharon, no. You've been telling everyone for weeks that you didn't agree. No one was listening. There wasn't a lot you could do about it. Yeah, you could have withdrawn your consent, but where would we be right now if you had? It isn't ideal, and it was a hell of a thing, but at least we know who we're looking for now. If they had listened to you, he might have been safer, but…" Andy sighed. "When it comes to Rusty, you're not the cop. You're the mom who happens to be armed. Sooner or later they're going to realize that's a hell of a lot more dangerous, but until then… you saved him. You're saving him now. Hard as it is."

"It doesn't change what almost happened," she replied. She swept her fingers beneath her eyes and sighed.

"No. Nothing can." Andy shrugged. "Can't put the bullet back in the gun, either, after its fired. That's like rewriting the past. Isn't going to happen." He set her off his lap and stood up. "What we can do is try and keep it from happening again. Step number one, Rusty safe. You did that. Step number two, get you packed and the hell out of here."

"Where exactly is it that you plan on taking me?" Sharon folded her arms over her chest and narrowed her eyes. "I'm not staying with Amy."

"No." He turned her and gave her a nudge toward her bedroom. "Although I doubt she'd mind. You're her hero. Were you not listening earlier? I've got eyes on you. You're with me."

Sharon dug her heels in and he bumped into her back. "Andy!" She whirled around so fast their heads almost bumped. "I can't just move in with you, even temporarily, the entire department would know! I've got twenty-four hour protection."

"Sharon." He put his hands on her shoulders and stared into her eyes. "The department already knows." He arched a brow at her. "You and me, we're not exactly… ambiguous."

She winced, her cheeks flushed. Then her hands covered her face. "Oh god."

"Pretty much." He turned her again and walked her down the hall with his hands on her shoulders. "Don't worry, we're so old, no body cares."

"That's just so… so…ageist." She sniffed delicately. "Why should we be exempt from the same rules as everyone else, just because we're slightly farther along in age."

Andy looked skyward. "Old, Sharon. The word you're looking for is old."

They walked into her room and she shrugged him off. Sharon walked to her closet, but not without glaring at him first. "That's not a word I'm really tempted to be using right now."

"Hello, have you met me?" He shot a wry look at her and plopped down on the bed while she took out a small suitcase to begin filling it. "Rules, meet loop hole. Loop hole, meet rules. It works for me." She bent over and his head tilted. He grinned. "Not that I would ever use that word on you."

"Andy!" She whirled, glared at him. "You are absolutely impossible, do you know that?"

"Getting more impossible by the minute." He winked at her. She still didn't look quite like herself, but she wasn't shaking, her color was coming back, and she was looking less splotchy. Well, maybe not less splotchy, but not quite so ready to fall over. He'd take what he could get. "You knew all that and more about me already," he shook a finger at her.

She blew her hair out of her face and rolled her eyes at him. "So this is what a mid-life crisis feels like."

"Ouch." He rubbed his chest and stood up to help her. "That one is going to cost you." He opened a drawer in her dresser and grinned widely. "I'm thinking it's going to cost you this one." He held up a little purple nightgown and waggled it, and his brows, at her. "Sharon, what do you think?"

"It's not your color, honey, but if you really want to try it on." She smiled sweetly at him. "The word old does not get you anything out of that drawer," Sharon said firmly.

"We'll see." Andy tossed it over onto the bed anyway. He opened the next drawer and grinned. "Hey, I can work with this." He pulled out a blue Dodgers t-shirt. "So… that's where it went."

"You leave it, I keep it." She laid several suits and the bag on the bed. Then she started filling the overnight bag with the items he was tossing onto the bed. "Andy, at some point, I'm going to have to dress for work." She rolled her eyes and huffed in exasperation when he tossed several other inappropriate items onto the bed. "Oh move." She walked over and shoved him aside. "You are absolutely no help."

"I take exception to that." Andy moved over and dropped onto the edge of the bed. He stretched his long legs out in front of him and crossed them at the ankles. "Alright. Fine. You win." He folded his arms over his chest and continued to watch her. "They're too scared of you. Apparently, you know everyone's deepest, darkest, nastiest secrets."

"Hm." She carried a stack of clothing to the bed and set it beside her bag. She regarded him with a raised brow as she sorted through the choices, and the items he helped pick out. "Is that what they're saying." Sharon leaned toward him slowly, then snatched up the small purple item he was particularly fond of. She dropped it into her bag and said nothing as she went back to packing what she would need for an extended stay away from the condo.

Andy snorted and rolled his eyes at her. "You would actually prefer scary to old?"

A small smile tugged at her lips and she parroted back at him, "Hello, have you met me?"

"You're impossible," he told her, grinning crookedly.

"You knew that." Sharon rolled a sweater and tucked it into the bag. "You more than knew that." Sighing, she stepped away from the bag and turned. Her gaze swept the room and she tried to anticipate anything else that she might need. Her hands moved into her hair and dark locks were tucked behind her ears. Her teeth tugged at the corner of her lip and she wondered if she had rushed Rusty out the door too soon. Did he have everything? Maybe she should make a sweep of his room, also, and see if there was anything left behind that she knew he couldn't do without…

"Come here." Andy reached out and curled an arm around her waist. He gave a gentle tug and pulled her over and down into his lap. He slipped both arms around her and let his chin drop to her shoulder. "Take a minute." The indecision wasn't like her, but understandable given the turn the day had taken. "What do you need, Sharon?"

She exhaled quietly. "Rewind the day?" Sharon tilted her head, leaning against his. "Go back and change my mind about all of this, not sign those consent forms." She lifted her head after a moment and smiled sadly down at him. "Pretend I'm still an objective professional and send Rusty to boarding school where he would have been safe."

"You don't know that." Andy ran a hand up and down her back. "For all we know this creep could have gone after him anywhere. You can second guess the decisions you made all you want, but it won't change them. Rusty is alive. You were there when it counted." He shrugged. "Even if it did scare the hell out of me and the rest of the team." Andy tugged on a lock of her hair. "You're a mom, you're not supposed to be objective."

"Hm." Sharon hummed and pushed herself off his lap. "I'm not Rusty's mother." She said nothing as she strode into the bathroom to begin gathering toiletries.

"That's the problem isn't it?" Andy stood up and walked over to lean against the open door. "You keep trying to remind yourself of that, and it's getting harder.

"I don't know why." Sharon packed cosmetics, and didn't look at him. She tucked her hair behind her ear again. "There are enough people reminding me." Between Taylor and Rios, she had heard it enough to last a lifetime. The truth was, Rusty was turning eighteen soon, he would age out of the system. What he chose to do after that, she couldn't say, and wouldn't be able to decide.

"He didn't want to leave." Hands tucked into his pockets, he continued to watch her, and the quick, efficient way in which she packed. Almost emotionless, although he knew she was anything but. She was trying too hard. There was still too much simmering beneath the surface. The difference was that she wanted to be emotionless, but the mask was effectively destroyed, at least for him. Andy had already gotten beneath it, her former image was shattered, he would never buy the ice queen routine again. He turned so that his back was leaning against the door frame. "He's going to understand. After this is over, when he's safe, and he's home, Rusty will understand."

"Rusty doesn't have to understand, he just needs to—"

"Sharon." He fixed her with a look. It wasn't a line he would buy. She could use it on as many people as she liked. Provenza, Sykes, even Taylor.

She sighed softly and reached up to rub her forehead. "Andy, I can't…" She leaned against the vanity, weight on her other hand. Her jaw clenched as the knot in her stomach tightened again. She forced another slow breath and shook her head. "It's just a week?"

The question, asked so quietly, made him push away from the door and walk over to grasp her shoulders from behind. He kissed the back of her head. "It's just a week, and you know, I think we'll get that nut job before then. We're pretty good, babe. It's why you wanted to be just like us."

"Oh. Is that it?" Sharon looked up and met his gaze in the mirror. They stared at one enough. In him there was understanding, and at the warmth in his dark eyes, she leaned back and reached up to lace her fingers with his. "Well, I suppose I just couldn't resist." She smiled back at him, and this time it reached her eyes. She was calming, the longer that she was with him, and while she wouldn't be able to relax until the stalker was caught and the trial was over, he was helping more than he knew. "You know what they say…"

"Never say no to a sure thing?" He smirked at her.

"If you can't beat 'em, take over." She returned his smirk.

Andy snorted. He kissed the back of her head again and stepped away. "I'm going to do a sweep of the other rooms. Charger and computer?"

"Dining room." She smiled at him. "Thank you." Sharon watched him go before letting her gaze drift back to the mirror. She stared at herself for a few minutes before closing her eyes. After one more deeply drawn breath, she nodded. One week. She could do that. Sharon quickly finished packing the cosmetics and toiletries that she would need before moving back to the bedroom. Besides, it was just as she'd told Rusty, she would be seeing him in only a matter of hours.

Sharon joined Andy in the living room as he was sliding her computer into the bag she typically carried it in. "I just have one question." She carried a garment bag and had another, smaller overnight bag draped over her shoulder. "Something you said to Rusty…"

"Yeah?" He looked up and carried the bag over to lay it on the chair closest the door. Andy shook his head. Designer laptop case. The woman needed a twelve step program.

"Bean bag." She arched a brow at him. "You don't really still have that, do you?"

Andy grinned widely at her. He reached into the pocket of his jacket and pulled it out. He waggled it and his brows at her. "Lucky charm. It's been hell hanging on to it. Sanchez keeps trying to steal it. Tao offered to buy it."

Sharon rolled her eyes at him, but had to smile. "You're all a little bit odd."

"Yeah… but now we're yours so you have to like us." When she joined him, he reached for her bags and leaned forward, kissing her quickly. "Let's get out of here. I want to see what else you packed."

She huffed a sigh at him. "You're also a little bit insane. This could be a colossally bad idea."

"Bad idea? Which part, me keeping an eye on you in case the creep decides to find you and finish the job? Never. I get that you can take care of yourself. My little lucky charm notwithstanding, you did take on the psycho freak in your bare feet. You beat down a door, scared him off, and saved the day. No shoes. Your heels are obviously not your super power. The thing is, Rusty wasn't leaving here without knowing that you were going to be okay. I'm not going to lie to the kid. If we want him to be honest with us, we need to give him the same respect, yeah?"

Sharon opened her mouth to protest, but found that she couldn't. Instead, she nodded. Yes, if they wanted to Rusty to be honest with them, then he deserved the same in return. She shifted where she stood and stilted her head at him, brows lifting so he could continue. There was more he intended to say, she could see it. Andy was working himself up toward something, exactly what, she couldn't tell.

"You're not going to a hotel because it's too hard to secure, so don't even try it. As much as you like Amy, you'd end up shooting her before the night was over. You're not in the mood for perky, even if she is bad ass when she needs to be. Sanchez is with Provenza and the kid, and none of us would ever think of suggesting Tao - not with his wife and kid at home. So that leaves me. It's pretty logical, when you get right down to it, but hell." Andy ran his free hand over his hair. "Sharon, really? I'm not letting you out of my sight. If you don't like it, I don't care. Now… do I think that I'm insane? About you. Yes. In general? Probably." Andy secured her door with a smile. "In general, because of you, absolutely."

There they had it. Her lips pressed together, and it was hard to suppress the smile. Her eyes sparkled with barely suppressed laughter. "Actually," she said at length. "I was thinking more along the lines of our leaving the condo when live bait could prove so much more enticing to our suspect."

"Oh." Andy shrugged. "Probably. But we want him alive if we can get him that way, unless we can get a more concrete way of tying him to Stroh. Right now, all we have is the word of a dirtbag inmate who never bothered to get nosey enough to read a note. We need the creep, too. The only problem is, if he shows up here, looking or you, while you're here, and I'm here… he's not going anywhere alive. I've seen you shoot, and I'm not feeling the warm fuzzy at the moment. So, ya know, probably better if we don't stay."

"When you put it that way." She opened the door with her free hand. "I'm driving."

"One word, Sharon." Andy followed her, shaking his head. "One word about my car, and I'm calling Sykes…" The laugh, more of a chuckle really, that his exasperated threat drew from her did more to convince him that she would be okay than the entirety of their conversation. A week, she could make it a week. He'd see to it that she did.

~FIN