Its beautiful! You should do more of these. Puruto! (I know everyone calls them Puditto but I like Puruto better)

I actually really enjoyed this, as a hardcore Pai/Lettuce shipper I usually loathe Pai/Zakuro and Ryou/Lettuce but you really pulled this one off. Good luck in the competition, my fic feels inferior now...

You definitely flip-flopped your shippings here!

I loved the idea of Pie coming to steal food from the Cafe; I mean, what better way to get great food and potential Intel on your opponents? And a sugar high...

That aside, I liked the idea of Zakuro being jealous of Lettuce, because she had both Ryou and Pie going for her attentions. I wonder how Lettuce would feel to learn that fact, that the insanely famous, beautiful model Zakuro Fujiwara was jealous of her.

The image of Pie and Zakuro sitting outside that door, both heartbroken of learning that their crushes were, in fact, together, was quite vivid and depressing, but it led to their happiness in the end. And Pie's description of Zakuro's eyes and how he expressed his feelings... SQUEE! Just perfect and wonderful. That was amazing.

Good job and nice story! :)

Boo the plot was too fast

Oh great,competition just got harder for the rest of us,heh well this was really good and this is comming from you competition by the way,well good luck!