This only leaves me with a deep sense of confusion. It's not a story at all and there was nothing about Sirius Black having a daughter, just him and his friends . . . messing around with a time turner or something. This was very poorly done, not creative in any sense of the word, it's just a confusing mess.

Just using dialogue throughout your story will not get you many viewers, purely because readers like to understand the characters, empathise with them. This isn't telling anyone any of these things. Just something to consider. On that note, I would like to say that this story has potential with a little extra work.