Oh lord! I loved it! Your story make me cry when Fox was know about James' Death. Congratulations man!
(I'm sorry for my english xD)

First off, hey again! How long has it been, like a year or so? XD Second, this is a great take on Fox's backstory. (Please forgive my poor use of English before you read this haha.)

I think by June 4, Tuesday with Bill is when you start seeing the gist of what's to come, but the whole chronological play was interesting—it sets the contrast in mood well (and thank you for the dates because without them, we'd be completely lost). Let me start with content!Fox. I like this "normal" sort of feel you gave him, how simple his pride and respect for his dad is—actually, rephrasing that. The fact that the calmer scenes feel so "normal" is where you got a lot of the tension of "What happened what happened?" when you switch back to the "Oh my..." angsty parts. And with all that said, I get a big slice-of-life feel (literary genre I think?).

As for general critique (actually, it's not really critique more than it is a passing thought haha), I think you had the potential to saturate the contrast between the angst and some of the happier moments even further, making it more distinct. For example, when you had that line:

[Alone.

Alone on this podium in front of an audience of hundreds.]

I thought it was gonna be another angsty moment until you get to the second half when you start seeing Fox's happier reaction eased in there, which can be missed if you glaze past it and might not catch till James appears there. With this and the other "happier" moments, is there a way to convey that happier sense from the start rather than a third or halfway down each one when we finally start seeing Fox's emotions in his actions?

Well, I guess if you do want other critiques (actually, these are just nitpicks haha), there was this one where you could risk more show-not-tell:

• [Bill slammed his hands against the table. He wasn't backing down.]

That second sentence, I am confident you can do without it with a few tweaks.

And if you wanna count this line from the beginning:

• [He was supposed to call me.]

When I first read it, I thought this was a twist on first-person-sounding-like-third-person, something like that, but if this was meant to be Fox's thought, I'd recommend italics? Haha confused me a bit, but yeah.

Not much other than that I could think of besides that. I hope that helps! A really nice read, I mean I haven't been in the Star Fox fandom in ages, so I'm glad to have caught this while it's still on the front page haha. XD And considering you say this is your worst genre, I think you did great! You kept the atmosphere consistent in each moment, and the end brought a nice feeling of hope. :)

Cheers!

- Tune

If this is your worst genre the mind boggles as to the quality of your best - really strong, believeable, sometimes difficult to read (in the best possible sense - you really feel Fox's turmoil) character work, here. No easy cure-alls, either - a painful catharsis and the beginnings of hope.

Really, really enjoyed this, not least the back-and-forth vignette approach. Very effective. You are definitely high on my list of ones-to-watch. Keep it up. :-)

Absolutely superb work you did here. Never have I read anything that expressed Fox's emotions after losing his father better than this did. It was long, yes; but very rewarding in the end. I don't know how this could have been improved at all, actually.

There are quite some stories out there describing several takes on Fox's past. It's something that didn't receive much attention in the official franchise, which makes it hard to pinpoint a 'path' through several events. I rarely get one that's this good.
Something I liked were the character descriptions. They all 'fit' the respective character. Bill is the friendly yet protective canine we know. Falco is, well, Falco. Fox clearly starts to break down after he hears of his father's death but slowly pulls himself together. That's like him.
Chronologically this could perhaps use some refinement. I don't know if it's just me, but I find it confusing that the dates run through each other. Sure, there's the date at the top of each section, but still...
Overall, this is very good.

This was VERY good, quite angsty and emotionally intense!