Great! Fabulous! So filled with feelings! You have got the pen of a writer! Use it wisely!

You should write one saying how jack died and the guardian's reactions

I followed this story twice just to make sure

Very cute concept, but I highly suggest getting a beta to help with the editing. Without even going into the finer points of the story, getting this edited will help keep the reader engaged.
Ariel_of_Narnia