That LeafGreen though.

Yes. YES. I'LL TAKE IT!

I loved how Leaf and Gary interacted, and how she slapped him at the end, that's the best part of this fic. Mourning the loss of Brianna is a fresh touch too, I felt bad for May and Drew. The argument between Dawn and Paul though was intense, I got worried when he was about to shove her, I'm sure he would of REGRETTED IT THE DAMN BOY.

This was definitely worth the wait ( ͡ ͜ʖ ͡).

Wow... I just read this whole story. I really like it, although its definitely sad too. :'( Looking forward to the sequel to this! And I'm guessing someway or another Dawn will end up staying, or coming back. Great job so far!

Way too many characters/people you pulled into this... I can't keep track who's with who.
Anyway, the fight is interesting. I hope to know soon what's really happening!

What Gary meant by "that"? A reference I didn't get.

Emm... Rowan and Juniper are already surnames, you should pick FIRST names for these characters. Also there are a few grammar mispellings, but all in all, story is going ok (though still too much dialogue and near to nothing narration).

It is going nice 'til this point, I really love GaryxLeaf. Though the story goes only through dialogues? Because more actual narrating would be good...

Stop killing me
Brianna
I usually don't care for her, but like, this made me feel so bad x . x
ALSO LYRA AND HER MALICIOUS SMIRK YES
Damn, Cynthia is baaadddassss
Still don't like her tho :P
BRIANNA WHY
I VISIONED THAT KILL PERFECTLY JUST
WHY

There are a lot of spelling an grammatical errors in this chapter. Like where it says "the three girls picked the food they wanted to eat at the buffet and eated together on a table". You should change it to "the three girls picked the good they wanted to eat from the buffer and ate together at a table". There are a lot more but since IDK how to quote from the story and computer won't copy and paste it for some reason, I will only be giving this one example. I recommend you get a second person to proof read your chapters after you wright them.

Brianna's confession was really.. heartbreaking, actually. I feel bad for her now x.x But Drew had to do what his heart wanted, if that makes sense xD
LEAF AND GARY KISSING IN A TRE N-
This was a great chapter! I can't wait for more :D

It's an interesting chapter so far but in some of your sentences there some errors like the use of 'off' and 'of' then this part "Yeah, that's right. What use where you back then?" Zoey said. Maybe you just mistype it but its suppose to be 'were' But all in all its a good chapter _

AWESOME! This first part was great! I'm really glad everyone survived! I'm really looking forward to the second part! I knew you were gonna do a cliffhanger but I didn't expect that! You're doing a great job! Missing Barry :/

0.0 God that exciting, and that sad, if that is very hard and difficult, I like the chapter especially the part of Gary and Leaf was graceful, I wait with anxieties for the next chapter, continues this way.

BARRY! WHY? WHY YOU?

NOOOOOOOOOO BARRY WHY WOULD YOU
My heart jumped when that happened oh god poor Dawn I feel so bad for her uuuuggghhh
I loved this chapter though x) I can't wait for more! The action scenes are just sooo good and the amount of characters are amazing, especially since you can handle them all lol
*Patiently waits for next update*

Great chapter BlueNight! I can't wait to see the development of the characters after this! Keep up the good work!
Xo