This was excellent. Loved it.
Thank you so much for sharing it :)

The. Best. Story. Ever
No one could ever have written anything nearly as good! GOOD JOB AND KEEP WRITING PLZ!

This was great!

I really enjoyed this story - the reason for the deadline and the fact that Nate willingly missed it were both in character and I liked your portrayal of pre show Eliot.

Well, this was a thrill ride indeed. I caught myself, somewhere around chapter 15, checking how many chapters I still have to read, and cursing when I found out there's so little of them.
Great twists near the end - and you managed to keep the suspense even while slowing everything down.
Great job - a perfect jewel.

I really liked this story. Your Nate is even more obviously broken in the pilot, lashing out at Eliot like that. It really highlights the way that Eliot and Sophie trust him to do his job, Nate's willingness to (sometimes) listen to Eliot, and Eliot doing what he can to help Nate hold it together.

I'm late to the party for reviews, but I'm here anyway, lol. Yes, the way you explained the choice makes perfect sense. Although for me, Eliot-whumper that I am, the third person omniscient is the perspective that I'm used to, and that a lot of writers (myself included) use profligately. Anyway, I am duly chastened and hope that you will indeed write that bonus chapter (I would be all a-flutter about it, honestly!).

I have to apologize for not reviewing on the other chapters, but every one was nail-biting suspense, and well thought through and written. Thanks for an enjoying read!

Just perfect. Eliot gets a few legit jobs, Nate gets back to his family, and the croc, and a foundation is layed for the future for our two men. I have really enjoyed this story.
I love the description of Christmas is LA. If you have never seen it before it can be quite dazzleing. Psycodelic, even. I also liked how Eliot reassured himself that he was too tough to sound too child-like. Yeah, he's a toughie alright. Thank you for this great read... a real rollercoaster.
A bonus chapter would be more than welcome.

I absolutely loved this, despite it being the last chapter. I was wondering if, before it was all over, Eliot would go back and get that crocodile, and he did. xD It's hard to complain about the story being over when the ending was this good. Loved all of Eliot's comments and observations about all the xmas decorations, too. xD

And I would definitely NOT say no to a bonus chapter. Any way to get more of this story - I'm all for it!

Anyway, I thoroughly enjoyed this story, and just want to give you (and Conelrad) kudos for coming up with it and writing it and sharing it with us. You guys are awesome. I love both of your work. You can be sure I'll be on the lookout for any future stories from either of you. ;)

Such a sweet ending. I'm glad Nate got the crocodile after all, and Eliot isn't such a bad bad-guy anymore.

I thought this was terrific from beginning to end. Your character development was spot on and your writing so descriptive I felt I was watching an episode of the show.

I liked the ending. I think it had o end that way, anti-climactic with the two characters acknowledging a mutual respect for one another.

I sincerely hope you write another one.

Thank you for a well thought out, well researched and well written story. I throughly enjoyed every chapter and although I am sad that it is over, have the solace (yay!) that I can always reread it.

I understand where Whimseyrhodes is coming from with his/her comments, but I personally liked the way that you kept the story in Eliot's perspective.

More stories, please!

Lisette

I loved it and I think you handled it great. I'm looking forward to the epilogue but sad to hear that it's done!

No pitchforks from me man. I totally loved what you did here and agree with your reasoning wholeheartedly. This really was an excellent chapter. Bittersweet, yes, but I think that made it just that much better. And I'm so not ready for the epilogue. That means it'll be over. xD But bring it one, anyway, I guess. I know it'll be great.

well, that was certainly an... anticlimax. it reminds me of the trope I was taught to never employ in creative writing, the ' I wrote myself into a corner, what do I do? Ah let's just have them wake up out of a dream.' you build up the action, suspense, and energy very very well in the first 20 chapters, and now with this chapter, the energy that we have accumulated has nowhere to go. It's like walking into a wall. there really needs to be a chapter between 20
and 21 to segway from energy to stillness. all in all, the story was very well written and very energetic, and I really really loved all of it, except the suddenness of the last chapter. :-\