Just when it was starting to get interesting

Lol he still seals naruto? and Naruto still uses Kyuubi's chakra... piss off. This story isnt even worth reading anymore.

please update, it's great

I understand your reasoning for putting this story on hiatus, but I present you a counterpoint:
Why not do exactly what you said should be done, but in your own way, so as to say "I have done better than you" to the actual "writers" (I hesitate to call them even that). Don t get angry. Get even.

Shame you stopped writing the story

This is ridiculous. There is no way that Jiraiya and Tsunade would take that from Danzo, Koharu and Homura. They both know the length those old biddies will go to maintain their view and powers. Filler doesn't count, Danzo is a threat and both the Sannin would know that Danzo manipulated Orochimaru and others into what they are today, and it is not beneath them to notice Genjutsu. Danzo was probably using the Kotoamatsukami on the Daimyo, and that got him the seat.

But the shinobi of Konoha would not recognize him. Especially considering that Kakashi and others know what Danzo has been doing for years and none of them would let him get away with this. Don't pretend otherwise.

You stupid fuckiing cunt. Your story sucks ass

I
A Sorry!

But this has killed any, and all passion I once had for anime and fanfiction.

So...

Thank you!

There are many things that could be used to improve your overall writing. At the moment, your writing is poor and could be much improved. This ‘review’ will be your guide to that, so please keep these words in mind. Save them somewhere as soon as you finish reading this critique.

My first notice is your punctuation, and overuse of words. For example, in this chapter, the following sentence was said by Anko Mitarashi:

“What the hell Ibiki!” “There’s twenty five teams left,”

‘What the hell’ seems to be an often reoccurance in your writing, especially when it has no relevance. I could reword this sentence, towards the better of Anko’s character, since this is an incredibly out of character response for Anko. I believe in another Naruto fanfiction of yours, she had a similar response to the outcome of twenty five teams before the Forest of Death.

Rewording it, a much better response that Anko could use would be the below:

“Ah, Ibiki, you must be getting soft to have twenty five teams left. The next stage will treat them well, for sure!” Anko sarcastically states, licking her lips. “If you can call well-treatment half of the teams being wiped out.”

I believe this statement well panders to Anko’s character, as she is often seen as a seductress Jonin, as well as she apprenticed under Orochimaru, so sarcasm has become a trait of hers. This statement also leaves out incorrect punctuation that occurred in the sentence, the brash ‘!’ being one, and the other mindless ‘,’ even when the sentence was not being carried on by her. Just as a little hint, I’ll include an example for how ‘,’ should be used in such a situation.

“Hell, Ibiki, you must be getting soft. Twenty five teams was usually never your thing.”

With that as beginner’s dialogue, the dialogue switches onto Ibiki. Stay patient, the example hasn’t happened yet.

“Well, Anko.. you’d be surprised to learn that this bunch is particularly worthy.”

“Ah, I see.” ‘Anko’ responded. She took a breath before speaking again, her early arrival overlooked. “Listen up kiddos, the second stage is next, and I’m your proctor!” “The second stage is also otherwise known as the Forest of Death, where you could be injured. However,” Anko paused. “Some might not just get injured. There may be loss of life.”

There’s the example. As shown, the example occurs just before Anko pauses in her sentence. This would be the correct usage.

I’d like to move on, to talk about your word choice next. I believe you need to expand your vocabulary, and look up synonyms and antonyms to note. If you’re going to take writing seriously, please, this is a must. Also, in your word choice I noticed that you include words from Japanese that are written in Romaji and are pretty basic. Guessing from this, you probably are a weeb. This also tells me you need to be more serious about being a writer, if you write anime fanfiction. Please do not disrespect the Japanese culture by doing this. For example, in another fanfiction of yours from Naruto, Naruto said the following sentence:

“Hai, Ero-Sennin.”

Now, I take it this means “Yes, erotic Sennin.” But why would you include a sentence of poorly written Romaji in the middle of a English fanfiction for English readers? This is not only disrespectful, but doesn’t make any sense. Also, I have another example of this. There was a sentence in this fanfiction- a whole sentence of English- that ended in ‘Ja ne!’ Not only do other readers probably not know what that means, it is also a huge presence that wards people away. I have no idea myself why I kept reading your fanfiction initially, but I have to admit because of this, I largely skimmed through the first one I read, as well as this one. Please, please, if you’re going to write fanfiction in English, write all of it in English! If you want to use Japanese words, write in Japanese in Kanji or Hiragana. Refrain from these nonsensical random Romaji words randomly strewn about.

Another note, please use proper capitalization for titles. And please, refrain from random sex scenes if this is not a ‘lemon/porn/smut’ fanfiction.
Pay attention to little details as well.
Edit your stuff before you post it.

Now, I realize that I probably got a little irritated during this, and I probably failed to remember half of the rest of what I was going to talk about, but I’ll return to it another day, or be satisfied and never review again in my life.

Sorry if this was too long, and please take my advice!

What the fuck is this shit

While the overall idea of your story is a good one, I find that you don't put much detail into it and you skip threw your story without much thought. Like the funeral, you had a touching moment with naruto and konohamaru, then you just skipped over him. Or the knowledge of naruto having his parents memories. When did that happen? It's wasn't mentioned in your chapters when naruto revealed it, or why who he revealed it to. I mean right after the wave ark hiruzen somehow knew naruto knew about his parents even though naruto didn't tell him. There are a ton of holes in you plot. I believe you should rewrite the story in more detail and fill in the blanks before you continue on.

that was good keep the chapters coming

Looks like Ibiki is Popo confirmed

I think I caught a mistake. Earlier in the story, you said Naruto had mastered all three of the basic steps for his three affinities, which included splitting a leaf. Earlier in the chapter, you said he had only been able to cut 1/4 of the leaf. I'm not sure which one is correct.

Well done for ruining this fic