Oh my, that one was maybe the bem very best tiva ff I've ever read!
Thank you!

Congratulations, you have successfully ripped my heart out, beaten me over the head with it and crushed it in a blender. The amount of pain in this is KILLED me. So so so so amazing!

Why did I only find your story today? This was so real, & so good, & so heartbreaking...I'll look for other ncis ff by you. Thanks for the angst !

I am so behind the rest of the world In reading fanfic, but Jelena you are the best! This seems exactly the right interpretation for Ziva's actions and Tony's response. I appreciate this Tony, and that he is strong enough to call her out on her insecurities and guilt, and why it has worked against their relationship. You made sense out of nonsense. I felt the writers put Adam in to merely prolong the angst, but your interpretation not only shows another level of probable reality, but actually makes PPF more believable. In addition your writing is a absolute pleasure to read. ( Recently read Famigliaand laughed out loud several times- cried I

wow, i did not have a chance to watch this part, but I love this story.

My my my. Beautiful. If this had actually happened on the show, PPF (11x02) would make totally sense. You did give an insight that brights everything up no matter how much dark all is now.
thank you.

Oh my god that was so beautiful and true to character and so beautifully done and you've made me see things in an entirely new perspective. You just switched my entire Tony/Ziva perception forever. It's rare I ever find a story that does that. Like, maybe three total, in all my fanfiction reading. This story just flipped the script, in a beautiful, painfully aching way. Like, this physically hurt me to read. This was so insightful and beautiful, and before I read this I never knew this is what I was looking for. This was so beautiful, I just can't say that enough. It occurs to me that most authors just pretend that Tony is an all-suffering beacon for Ziva, one who would never, ever tire of her, or be hurt with her, or angry or would deny her. But that's selling him short; he's not that one-dimensional. I think I finally found the dimensions that're missing from Tony in all the other stories I've read. He IS forgiving, but he's not a masochist. You've made him real, given him facets other authors can't even dream of. You didn't make him into Mr. Perfect who forgives all and takes the girl into his arms even when he's hurting so terribly. You made him human. That's what really did it. You captured Ziva magnificently, but what will stay with me from this story is what you've done with Tony. If I could rate this story, I would give it the highest rating. So perfect. So beautiful.

This is exceptional. The absolute closest intreptation i could see happen as an actual episode. Personally, i think you know these characters better than any other fanfiction i've ever read.

Oh head! This is just right on the $$$$!

Wow...this is amazing!

actually, I think you've written this scene better than the WRITERS could have. And I wouldn't be a bit disappointed if they took the cue card and made this the first ep of season 11.

OH MY GOSH THIS IS SO BEAUTIFUL. I LOVE THIS

i really loved this fic,tony and ziva are so IC... please,tell me you?re going to write something for fill the hiatus and to improve the season finale

Very nice! Thank you.

Interesting take. I love your stories and how you interpret these characters so for that reason I continued reading even after I sensed where you were going with this and I started to disagree with Tony's sentiments. I understand where he's coming from and I understand his hurt. But his reaction? To the extent of telling her that he will not wait for her? That's just proving her point isn't it?

Okay, Adam. She slept with him, by her own admission at a time of weakness because she needed comfort and affection after burying her father. I don't see her as doing anything wrong. She IS single and in spite of how she feels about Tony (and vice-versa) they are/were not in any way together. And to say that there is an implied one that she should honour would then bring into question, and not to be petty, Tony's actions of flirting his way through the female population surrounding him. Oh but it's okay, because it's just harmless flirting and it's Tony! That's just who he is. He's not actually sleeping with these women right? Nevermind the blatant disrespect for women he portrays by objectifying them or what about the blatant disregard for Ziva's feelings when he does it purposely in front of her to get a rise out of her? It's okay cause he's the man-child DiNozzo? This misogyny and double standard irks me and it's startlingly prevalent in prime time television even with seemingly strong and independent female characters.

The fact really is that he still can't understand. He can't even possibly begin to understand what she's going through and her motivations imo. He can only try and I can see here that he is trying (and surprisingly I do think TV Tony gets this hence his acceptance of her in the finale). She lost her only surviving relative and the ensuing quest for justice, for not only her father but for Jackie Vance, is bound to place her family, Team Gibbs in danger. And I also think that Ziva's first instinct is to protect Tony, granted most of the time she tries to protect him from herself, but also from any sort of danger. There have been so many instances where in the event of an explosion she dives for him with the most recent being last season's finale when Dearing blew up NCIS hq. So with that in mind, my understanding is that, just as you mentioned here, their relationship is too important to screw up with a sympathy bang. I'm glad here that he calls her on it and tells her to trust him enough to let him be there for her. That is what you got right here imo. His treatment of her, however has only left me all the more sure that she deserves better than this Tony. I really can't believe I'm even saying this here but Tony here needs to be more like TV Tony in that he really needs to grow up, stop thinking about himself here and try and show her that she is indeed not alone and the she can count on him. Telling her that there's a deadline on how long he'll wait for her just goes to show that he doesn't even understand the sacrifices that she has made for him.

Thank you for sharing! :)