I think you should write more, when you can as it is really good so for, yet sweet, please and thank you.

Try what I call "broken sentences". They have better effect when emphasizing pain, hopelessness, and depression. Here (from my own writing); "...She was chained. Poisoned. Crying. Dying." (is that how I wrote it?) It adds effect. Think of it as poetry, not prose. I am not saying this is the right way to write (see what I did there? XD) but, it is what works for me. Cuz I suck at writing prose unless I incorporate poetry somehow. -_- Anyway... nice story! to thumbs up! U (does that even look like a smiley face)

Dream within a dream, hmm . . . I've just read this and, obviously, couldn't resist favoriting. Great way of mixing those heavy angsty feels followed by fluff in a happy ending; I actually liked how it was only a nightmare. :P Poor Jack.

I got teary eyed. This is so sad but then it gets happy so its good!

I did not laugh-cry, I simply started to bawl.

Whew, was starting to think that it was real. Like Jack, that none of it really happened. So glad that it was a nightmare

You did make me cry. Not laugh/cry, but really cry. Then I smiled.

AWW

Oh, no, you are very very good at making people cry, you made me cry, at any rate...
Such an adorable story, I love it! Keep writing!

Well, I teared up, i'll give you that! I love sad stories so this is one for the favirotes list!
P.s. you're a great writer, much better than me. :)

What do you mean a failed attempt?! I'm crying over here! Great story!
I'm glad that it was only a nightmare but it was so sad...

failed? That, mo' Cherie (my darling), was AWESOME! SERIOUSLY. For something that's not your thing, you sure are amazing at it!

AW that was so cute and sad at the same time!

Not a fail, this is a tearjerker. Had me on the edge of my seat pleading for Jack. Great job!

Fuck that You totally made me cry my eyes out And I haven't even watched the movie. Great story made me cry on my birthday too...sniff