You completely skipped the storm that the company had to ride in for several days where Bilbo asks about other wizards and Gandalf introduces Radagast's name to the group. That would have been when Pearl was revealed. I just can't read anymore. This story is badly written and needs so much work. It serves only to frustrate. I hope you don't take offence. I try to give honest criticism.

So Pearl makes absolutely no decisions for herself, has no personality, does everything everyone tells her... Bilbo decides for her, then Gandalf makes decisions for her. And through all this she's still pretty dumb, understands nothing of context or body language, takes no control over her own life, and has a lame and unoriginal name. I'm sorry, but with all the potential you have for this story, I feel like you seriously wasted it. If she's older than Thorin, she'd be over 195 years old, and apparently after so many years she's still as innocent and ignorant as a child. Without even a name. Do mermaids not have a rich culture and history? Is this seriously the first time going on land has ever interested her? She has no personality at all, no depth. It's extremely dull to read about her. All the dwarves come in and she just sits in Bilbo's room, not curious at all and simply following baseless orders from people she just met and hardly knows. This behaviour is actually a huge turnoff. I recommend a rewrite.

I was kinda hoping she'd be with bilbo for several weeks if not months to learn about the surface world before the quest to Erebor, since she seems really naive and ignorant right now. She would be a huge burden on the company as she is, and having time to adapt would have been nice... I like the idea, but I have a bit of an issue with the format since there are no line skips between paragraphs. I also wish you would describe her appearance as both a mermaid and a woman. There's no real description of what things are like from her point of view, and the story seems to follow Bilbo most, yet it's supposed to be a Thorin/OC story, so I'm not sure how that will play out. Anyways, i will continue to read and see how things progress.

I just read through this and I loved it. I bawled like a baby after Thorin died and when he came to visit them after. Lovely story

This is like the third time reading this story still love every part of it you're amazing

Read this entire thing in maybe 2 hours and I couldn't be more pleased with the ending. I've never seen a fanfiction where Thorin actually dies but you wrote it so well!

THORIN AND PEARL ARE ALREADY AN OTPPPP! sooo excited!

And I dIED when Gandalf said "Perhaps her gentleness is what you need" my poor heart can't take much more Pearl cuteness :))) also, I adore Bilbo and Pearl's friendship XD It's really cute :) I put emojis in my first few reviews, but I don't think they show up in the posted review ;_; So if there's a run-on sentence, it's because an emoji used to be there lol :o)

And AGH I can't wait until Pearl can get into the water at Rivendell and then hopefully the doubting dwarves will see what she truly is :)))

OOOooohhh and if you've read Harry Potter, I've just had an epiphany: Pearl reminds me of Luna Lovegood! :D they both like magical creatures (well, Pearl IS one lol), and they both are very insightful about life and often say those things out loud, sometimes to the discomfort of others.

And LOL when Thorin discovered that Pearl is FIVE CENTURIES old XDDD He's not as all-knowing as he likes to think he is ahaha

Oh yAY Thorin found out what she is! Aaaaahhhhhhhhhh I hope he won't react too badly :o

I write each statement as I read and react, so that's why the reviews may feel a bit bumpy lol :) 3

ARRRGGHHH THORIN MADE ME SO MAD WHEN HE SAID SHE WAS DAFT IN HIS KINGLY IGNORANCE and I squealed when the dwarves reminded Pearl of dolphins it was so adorable! and I awwwhhhed when Balin trusted her and talked to her and I hope they get to be friends I love her choice of pony! she's so precious! That will make her relationship with Thorin all the cuter and I laughed so hard when Oin said, "Whores aren't maidens". I couldn't even tell where he got it from, but that made it more funny

AND WHEN THORIN SAID "WHAT HELP COULD YOU HAVE TO OFFER" I WANTED TO REACH THROUGH THE SCREEN AND PUNCH HIS NOBLE NOSE I WAS SO ANGRY OMG

wOW Pearl just gets cooler and cooler! She can enchant people by singing?! Totally awesome! it makes sense, though, seeing as she's a mermaid

can't wait to read more!

I wonder if it's ok if I post my thoughts for every (few?) chapter(s)... do normal people do that..? I know I would appreciate it if someone did that on my stories (if I had any published lol ), so verily I shall :) I was like "FILI SHUT UP" when he said that Pearl had a fitting name and then I choked when Balin thought she was Bilbo's wife I also laughed when Bilbo was like "OOOkkkk let's leave now" when Pearl said innocently, "I've never had feet" and the dwarves were thinking, "wwhhhaaaaaattt?" anyway, i really liked the chapter and look forward to reading more!

I LITERALLY DROPPED MY PHONE AND STARTED SQUEALING AND WRITHING AROUND ON THE FLOOR IN PURE HAPPINESS WHEN I READ THAT HER FIN TURNED INTO LEGS It's SOOOOOOO good so far! Can't wait to read the rest of it!

I legit cried oh my god... do u realize that you've made the single greatest fanfic I've ever read in my life oh lord let me take a breather here... I freaking love you rn pls take me away

I don't understand Gandalf's reasoning for bringing Pearl. There's a lake or whatever near the Shire so he could've just dropped her off back there. Or he could just leave her be with Bilbo. And he even specifically said that some people may want to keep her. That's an extreme no-no for their quest seeing as it's supposed to be top secret.

a thrilling and enjoyable story to read

This is really thought out. I can appreciate that. I think the romance between. Tho run and pearl is a little over done. Otherwise it's a great story.

I like your story although sad from when Thorin dies until the end but glad she joined Thorin.