Awesome idea and love this oneshot!

very good. Thank goodness the Naruto series didn't go this way. It would be so sad...

Wow.
I am speechless.

Damn... what a horrible fate.
Awesome one-shot though!

Awesome.

Holy shit.

I think this sums up the review nicely.

And again, for good measure: HOLY SHIT.

Fantastic writing. I found this both utterly sad, then upon the end, rather terrifying. You did fabulous with the personality disorder by the way, for a person whose adopted another identity into their head, being as they don't know everything, they know enough to be convincing. All in all this was fantastic.

Oh wow. Really interesting piece you have here. At first, I was thinking that the way "Sasuke" had been saying things didn't fit in with his character (I sorta imagine a rougher, cut-throat bluntness to his voice rather than the rather formal tone you got here) and that the backstory didn't fit from what I remember, but then you get to the end here and wow. Not expecting that at all, so kudos on that! Though I can't imagine Naruto with such a tone either unless he's gotten a lot older now, which by the looks of it, he is haha. Nice how you decided to go interview style. All-dialogue stories are tricky to pull off—especially description-wise, but you got it done well here. Like we can imagine both of their actions and their moods through what they say.

I think my main gripe with the story is from the dialogue from the beginning (it's not there as much later on); you actually don't need to have as many verbal ticks as you do. The stutters, the trip-on-words. (Um… you know…know when t-there is t-those… uh… those pauses, and it… it gets a bit… distrac— yeah.) Remember us readers can imagine those verbal ticks on our own and we each experience it differently. Written dialogue is not the same as spoken dialogue. It'll be easier to read through without having so many. Stutters are fine to have, but sparingly.

Hope that helps! Cheers!

Tune

Very original, very well-written and a very interesting story. The interview format for story telling is kinda new to me but I liked it a lot as it answered the questions I developed in my mind. The last paragraph was of course, as you intended, a definite game-changer. I think this is what makes this good story into a great one. I also liked the way you wrote the whole 'Sasuke finds his family murdered' scenario. But the thing I liked the most was how realistic this seemed. The sad/morbid ending also ties in to the realisticness of the story.

I'm definitely interested in a follow-up of this if you could show what happened to the other important figures in Naruto's life (Kakashi, Sakura, etc)

Twoshot pls.

I read the through the story, and when I read the end...that's just scary.

This interview format is an interesting way to tell a story. I like the asides during the questioning, such as when the old man asks for water and his straight-forward acknowledgement that yes, he's blind, moving on...
The man's perception of his brother is a little skewed. I would understand the reasoning if he'd just killed the leadership but killing everyone but his brother is selfish. I'm sure there might have been other children who could have been spared "for the greater good."
Wrote first comments before finishing story. Patient #37 is a lot younger than I would have thought and admitted himself at a very young age.
I wonder how he became blind.
I like since having now read the end that the narrator/interviewer played dumb to get more information from the patient.
His comments about missing sleep are interesting. But knowing his delusion it's almost impossible to know what was real and what he imagined. Thanks for the literary prank.

Before I begin, I have no prior knowledge of Naruto, so I cannot comment much on characterization and such.

As creepy as this story was, I enjoyed reading it. It was interesting to read about the past life of Naruto (though he calls himself Sasuke). I was instantly pulled into the story when Itachi was introduced, being the older brother and having a bearing on your shoulders from your clan. I do side with him, as he did the right thing (though that sounds a bit disturbing).

I was surprised to see Naruto killing Itachi and ultimately taking that weight of a murderer on him. I am also kind of happy to hear his reasons of staying in the ward, seeing that his life was a lie and that he doesn't want to exist. Nice work on the notes at the end describing Naruto, since it ties in with the story and the whole 'Sasuke' charade.

No grammar mistakes were spotted while I read, so nice work with proofreading! Once again, I really enjoyed reading this amazing one-shot! :)

Disclaimer: I'm canon-blind :)

That said, I really enjoyed reading this fic, I don't think I've read a fic like it.

While I really like your framing technique and structure, the first part of the fic doesn't really work for me in terms of your narrator's voice. I think I know what you were going for regarding a naturalistic, hesitant dialogue style, but I think perhaps it's a little *too* realistic, to the point where I tripped up several times while reading. The use of bolded text was similarly distracting.

"The smell of blood and burning hair"- vivid and horrific, as was "broken dolls." You do a really stellar job here of describing an horrific scene without being gratuitous or disgusting about it.

As a stylistic thing, I'd drop "foolish little brother?" and simply have him say: "are you going to do that, too?"

While the bold text is invasive sometimes, I really like the question/interview format as the fic goes on. It's very helpful to clarify the plot and I like having my own internal questions (for example, why he massacred the clan) answered.

I quite like the bluntness of "yes, I'm blind" after the extreme prissiness of the question.

Damn, that last paragraph is one hell of a game-changer. Even as someone outside the fandom, I was able to really enjoy this one. Well done x

...wow? Never in my life had I thought that the Naruto universe could be used to do something quite like this. The premise and theme are very unusual, and the atmosphere does seem very...dark? Which is exactly what I like. and good lord, I never saw the twist at the end coming! quite sad, in a way, but I suppose I should have expected that judging from the genre and name. The story does set the stage for other stories, however. I was curious to see what happens to everyone else..please, write more abt this specific universe. Please.

...one-shot?! NO! YOU CAN'T LEAVE ME LIKE THIS! *ahem*.. Wow, I didn't see that last bit coming there - poor Naruto, thinking he's Sasuke. You should do another one-shot/two-shot, of various people who care for him visiting (for example, Kakashi, Iruka, Sakura) - it'd be interesting to see how he'd react seeing as he thinks he is Sasuke.

That was fantastic, and I don't think I've ever read a Naruto fanfic with such an original plot - I'd love for you to continue this in some way!