This was an intresting take on the challenge of trying to update the pokemon world. You had good ideas building up parts of the world to be more functional but that doesn't mean it's perfect.

In my opinion the battle club was not needed. Between the gyms and pokemon center you can easily have training rooms, battle fields for practice battles and some helpful experienced professionals who can help trainers improve. In addition you could even have cameras at those battle sites and have a couple of lines about those battles being available for broadcast to explain how trainers get money in this version of the pokemon world.

Your idea to use original characters is decent but you characters either wearing the face of some temp characters or just straight out original have so much emphasis placed on them in importance by your author notes but they have yet to pan out or gain any real depth.

At this point in the story we really don't see any actual struggles as we don't have Ash putting himself on a time table or directly comparing himself to others. Team rocket is seen as a joke which doesn't really add a sense of urgency or competition. While Ash is traveling he is not looking forward to seeing some sights it's just an arbitrary goal of being a pokemon master with no real plan or mentioned deadline. This is understandable because you are so earily in but it seems like time is irrelevant to Ash and that these set backs mean nothing. I'm not saying Ash should brood or wallow in defeat, but it should affect Ash. You kinda did this with Brock and his earily inability to catch pokemon but all is solved by another person before Ash even needs to ask for help.

This is not a bad story but where the story cuts off and the sheer lack of stakes or pressure at this point are it's crippling flaws.

Interesting thing about Bubblebeam, is that Cubone can also learn it. Which is why through convoluted means, I intend to get an Alolan Marowak to have it.

Will you let ash catch the Rhyhorn in the safari zone

Um.. When is the next update coming

This Indigo League rewrite is fantastic. I will say, I was hoping Ash could have caught a Weedle either c5 or c6 and maybe a Pidgey and a Spearow c1. It is cool that you gave Ash a Mankey early, a Nidoran (Male), and soon a Grimer. I have a few questions will Ash be getting Bulbasaur, Charmander, and Squirtle? Will Ash catch a Magikarp (Male) or buy the one on the S.S. Anne? How will you handle Charmander evolution into Charmeleon, and Charmeleon into Charizard? Will Charizard, due to his personality change, find a rival in Nidorino eventually NidoKing and the possible Magikarp that could become Gyarados? Does Misty still get Horsea and Psyduck, and Brock get Vulpix? To be Honest, I think Misty's Staryu and Goldeen should been her own and not the Gym's. I hope Misty adds a Tentacool and Seel, and I hope Brock adds a Diglett.

Will Ash and his friends visit Lavender Town and Cerladon before Saffron City? The reason is because. I hope Ash catches a Gastly that evolves into Haunter before Sabrina and Ash/Brock both adopt/catch Cubone. The reason for Celadon is Abra, maybe Ash wins an Abra or trades for one. Do you any plans for the Safari Zone?

As for the Gym Leaders, maybe they can have these teams:

Lt Surge: Voltorb, Magnemite, and Raichu, maybe Electabuzz

Erika: Weepinbell/Victreebel, Tangela, Gloom/Vileplume, Exeggcute/Exeggutor, maybe Ivysaur

Sabrina: Mr- Mime, Drowzee/Hypno, and Kadabra/Alakazam, maybe Exeggutor, I was thinking Jynx but I am not sure

Koga: Weezing, Muk, Venomoth, Arbok, Nidoking or Nidoqueen, and Beedrill

Blaine: Rapidash, Flareon, Arcanine, Ninetales, Magmar, maybe Rhydon or Charizard

I know the 8th is Gtovanni's the leader of Team Rocket, but I think maybe it should go to the Saffron City karate Master.

Karate Master: Hitmonchan, Hitmonlee, Machamp, Primeape, maybe Poliwrath

If you still go with Giovanni: Golem, Dugtrio, Nidoking, Nidoqueen, and Rhydon

I know Ash's Mankey has Dig, but will Ash teach Nidorino Dig, plus will Ash teach Mankey the elemental punches, and Nidorino Thudnerbolt? Though Mankey can learn Thunderbolt aswell.

As pokemon go for the Rocket Trio what about these:

Jessie: Besides Arbok and Lickitung, she could add Machop, Drowzee, and Magnemite, maybe Tentacool and Oddish

James: Beside Weezing, and Victreebell, should have been a Bellsprout, he could add Rattata, Voltorb, and keeps the stolen Hitmonlee, maybe he catch a new Magikarp and either steals or is given an Abra.

I was looking at the Pokemon Team Rocket grunts at the Game Corner Rocket Hideout and Silph Co.

Ash could swipe pokemon in and out once in a while since he possible will be getting more pokemon.

When the fanfic gets closer to the Safari Zone I will post my idea for it.

I'm starting to find this fanfic somewhat amusing. So I have five things to ask you. 1. Is there anything more to the plot? I saw the summary. 2. How did you come up with the idea for the fanfic? 3. Besides the main characters of the anime, who else is in the fanfic? 4. How old is everyone that's in it? 5. What Pokémon are they likely to have in the fanfic? Be sure to send me a response.

Nick Johnson

You wanted to make the anime better but you wrote the same thing but worse. This is trash and so is the OC

So in this story Ash's dad is Red.

Really you named her after Robin Hood.

Great

why am I the only person who thinks the first chapter is exactly the anime minus Richie and the battle

this is a great story can't wait for the next chapter hope you update soon

I really like all of the detail you put into Mankey learning Dig. It didn't just happen; Ash and Mankey both well and truly earned it.

ugh no I hate OC's