Yeah, that is a bit of a risk. Could definitely be the push needed though.

Shepard is useless in this story. He fucks up nearly every single mission, lies to literally every single person so much that I doubt he even knows which way is up or down at this point, every biotic stops him cold (even though in canon ME1 and 2 he mows down thousands of biotics with ease), he willingly caves to people he regularly told to fuck off in the games, and he is almost always whining. You are right that this is an AU, but it's because you're writing an entirely different character from the games. I don't believe for one second that this Shepard could have survived any of the events of ME1 or 2.

Further, Shepard from the games is easily the dominate personality in his relationship with Miranda. For all her cold exterior, inside she's an insecure woman looking to fill a void yet she clearly cares immensely for those close to her. This is why she was controlled by The Illusive Man and why she was attracted to Shepard and ultimately falls for him. Further, Shepard is not someone who would ever allow himself to be manipulated like he is here. I mean Miranda gets the better of him in every single conversation (though everyone else does to because Shepard comes across as immensely weak in conviction and personality here). Not once have I ever seen Shepard just unload on someone and verbally crush them in argument like he regularly does in the games. I'm not saying he's perfect, but Shepard clearly has a gift with words and his conviction and determination are nearly superhuman.

The story is good overall, but the characters in this story may as well all be OCs because not one of them is acting like their canon counterparts except for maybe Garrus, Anderson, and The Illusive Man. You haven't created Mary Sues, rather you've just changed them into people who are entirely different from the games.

"I should go" - Heh. Just snuck that right in there.

I know it is understating things a bit. But your Shepard has women issues. He really doesn't help himself in that regard though. ;)

Phantom Kelly. In a way that is even more creepy than Phantom Jack.

I just wanna punch "Williams" in the face so hard now...
(well actually I always did want to in ME3...)

Well, it's been a while since I last read this story, and I'll have to give this another run through at some point (been skimming it due to time constraints). I love what you've done thus far, and anxiously await an update!

This is all going to pot rather quickly, eh? Someone is going to get themselves killed.

Is anyone other than me worried that Miranda is going to get zombied against her will the longer she stays with Cerb?

Gad, thrown off the Normandy, put on the yellow submarine with Ash and Lt. 'hope I don't screw up', and...Allers. Yep, the universe must be ending. ;)

Unless that call to Joker can salvage the day.

Gritty. I like it. Liara really gave Shepard the full riot act.

UPDATE SOON! Love the story

War Asset: Ardat-Yakshi: 300 points. ;) (Or, rather, keeping them out of the hands of the reapers, perhaps)

Ups...worst time ever to embrace eternity, Shep..

Loved it! Kudos

Damn that 'embrace eternity' trap. Gets you every time ;)

Sneaking into a Justicar monastery isn't like sneaking into a police station...it's like sneaking into The Justice League.

Good chapter