Though I think you've done Samara a great injustice, I appreciate that you did so as a plot device: it makes this terribly interesting story possible. Your character development has frequently been utterly brilliant. You've done a great job of considering things like, "how to make the 'destroyed a village' story work within that context (something I have not yet resolved in the context of the story I'm telling, where Shepard recruits both.) I am enjoying a lot of this, and may even pirate bits of it for my own retelling.

Now that I've found this again (and left a review,) I've realised I should be more generous with my praise. You've done a commendable job steering story events to credibly explain how this character could behave as she does, and you write very good true-to-character dialogue. It's fun to read how she's realising she should change how she acts, and I'm hopeful she'll truly redeem herself by the time we get to the end of your writing about her. You've also explained well how she could be as powerful as she is. Commendable and recommended!

This is wonderful stuff. I'd read a few chapters from the middle of it once and then lost track of where I'd seen it. I like that you saved Morinth. Didn't like the Samara spin as much, but it *did* make the scenario more possible. FWIW, I didn't like having to kill her once to get the Dominate power, the biggest game-changer of all time, IMHO. I hope you're going to deal with that some more. (Actually have a bad guy Shepard to do everything wrong with, and BOY was I surprised to get Dominate as an option. And then also available on the next playthough!)

Criticism: I see the word "then" used when you mean "than." (It's important.)
Also noticed "Mealon" instead of "Maelon." Many other single typos, but nor enough to significantly detract from the story.

Lots of good armchair psychology, particularly in The Argument. Keep it up! As Samara said, "I am curious to see what you will do."

Having a depressive mindset, I can see Morinth's point. It's easy to see how someone with psychopathic tendencies could conclude the nicest thing to do for a bright flame in a dung heap is to give them some kindness and appreciation, then euthanize them and move on. I mean, ideally, you'd save them all, but even Morinth's "kindness" is more than most such flames will ever receive...

Interesting fleshing out of a rather 2D canon character. (It irritates me that the concept behind Morinth has loads of potential - a centuries-old psychic vampire hunted by her own mother - and canon just throws it away on her being a shallow psychopath. Bah.)

rather then - rather than

then that - than that

more then - more than

more so then - more so than

Justcars - Justicars

then most - than most

from reasonable - from a reasonable

our bosses little girl - our boss's little girl

Morith - Morinth

expereincing - experiencing

at comment - at the comment

heavy breathes - heavy breaths

were setup - were set up

speek - speak

Morith - Morinth

chose to - choose to

then that - than that

more then - more than

different level then - different level than

solider - soldier

rather fight then - rather fight than

rather then - rather than

Seems like you are unsure of the difference between the spelling 'then' and 'than', a reminder: the former is temporal, the latter comparative.
For some reason you used 'then' no matter which you meant, perhaps googling a quick grammar lesson wouldn't be a bad idea.

I love this story. I cannot wait for the update.. Hope everyone survives the suicide mission.. and if there will be a sequel.. I hope Morinth survives ME3.. maybe even saves her sisters in time..

Adart-Yakshi are treated like Mages in Dragon Age.. and that really rubs me the wrong way.

Loved it!

yet another great chapter.

The "In your face with a rocket launcher" is classic. Thanks for your hard work on this. Looking forward to more of your work whatever storyline it is in.

Ah, that was fun. :-) I am really liking the direction you took this story.

Another great chapter.

Also most of time Legion refers to itself as us. not that a big deal or anything.

Also I wonder If Shepard will give the illusive man the base or not as he really did help Shepard out before he lost his mind to the Reapers and if nothing else giving him the base kinda makes them even for the back form the dead thing and the new ship and other stuff. Although I guess doesn't make a big difference in ME3 other then helping with persuading the illusive man and having him think better of Shepard and the 10 extra EMS points.

Also if this story does go into ME3 and I hope it does I wounder If Morinth will stay on the ship or sneak back on or maybe be picked up at the citadel and if she'll want to go after her sisters sooner?

It was really good of her crew to do this for her. What a creative play with the in-game mechanics! :-)

I look forward to see what is Shepard planning.