Nice, careful writing. Although I can't help but point out that the main character is not very fitting, considering that the original character is a nearly flawless king with a mass of worshippers, both in
his own world and in ours.

Enjoyed your story - you could have made it into a good longer one if you had wanted to as you set up the characters really well...they were immediately engaging and I liked the idea.

Thanks :)

EXACTLY tch friggin morons bet they wish now they actually grew more then hallow facades and empty pride even Joey for Christ sake mutt your at the bottom rung of society yet you think your better then yami pa lease mediocre is still mediocre and if want out of that start by thinking before you act dumbass keep up the great work gtg now ja ne

I'm so happy the beginning was Yugi's POV! He's offically my fav character, he loves Yami and Yami's his hero and he'll even stand up to his own friends to prove it! You are My hero, little yugi!
Joey pissed me off! Asshole, but i LOVE Yugi's comeback! XD IN YOUR FACE JOEY!
Yami...living proof that there is a goddess/god in us all if we choose to bring it out ;)
I just DIED that Joey was practically seduced by Yami in that single moment! AWESOME!
Not sure if I believe Yami's cave story but cave-ins do happen.
XD poor Yami, all he wants is to be left alone and he can't catch a break: he was a nerd everyone treated him like dirt, now his inner beauty shines and they all want to be near him: idiots: GET YOUR OWN MINDS YOU SHEEP!
I almost BARFED when Barkely suddenly came up and was like all lovely dubby! Go Yami for putting his foot down. Still I feel like high school in this is a huge cliche. I mean high school kids are stupid but i know for a fact it wouldn't be like this, unless they have a really small school where everyone knows everyone: that would make sense, cause i grew up in a small town and I didn't know anyone outside my circle of friends. I barely even knew the names of the guys on the football team and my brother was on it all four years.
I love Kaiba in this, again he's the REAL kaiba, and of course he'd be impressed by Yami's guts and mind rather than his looks. It makes more sense so that part you got down!
Technically in Japan students aren't required by law to graduate high school because its like pre-college (middle school, which goes to age 14 is Mandatory though0 but high school and upper education isn't thats why they take exams and pay for it themselves, but anyway. I totally sympahtize with Kaiba.
I also like how they met, and Yami didn't just shove Seto aside like he did everyone else, and i doubt its cause of his crush either ;)
I was stunned by the ending though. It felt a bit rushed. I know you said this is a short fic but i really would've loved to see your take on this drama in a full-fledged story, instead of summing it up in just an epilogue. but overall i liked it. I loved the unique taste on the genre which is why i feel this is a total "the end should be the beginning story" (Short fiction and Creative writing make a comeback) I really think this could've been a full fledges fic and not just a two-shot.

I love the title! in one of the stories like this i mentioned the chap title was come out pretty butterfly, so I LOVE the imagery: Butterflys are the symbol of transformation. but I also like how you said a caterpillar with wings: cause its true, butterfly wings are gorgeous but the actual insect part of the butterfly is kinda gross, so I like how you play of both that imagery and reality.
XD and i know the feeling Shana: its happened to me more than once. How do you think FK and OL came about?
Poor Yami we've all been in his shoes: I remember in sixth grade, i would talk to myself while i wrote stories cause of my asburger syndrome (i'd act stuff out in my head) and the mean boys in my class said i had an imaginary friend name george and i was naive enough to not realize what was going on. and in freshmen year high school i took health and the boys started teasing me cause of the Reynolds Tobaccoo company of which I have no relation but still and a bunch of girls who made me the butt of a cruel joke: thank god for my teachers and my best friend Catherine: needless to say that was the yar i put my foot down.
Sad thing is some bullies are like that football looser, I HATE sterotypes like that though, my brothers are all on the football team and they've NEVER been like that: I mean one is a computer nerd, another wants to build houses and the third combines Bionicles: we all have an inner nerd and anyone who doesn't is kidding themselves: we forget half the stuff we learn in school but the torment...that stays with us forever.
Poor Yami, but i LOVE how he stands up for himself. Even as a nerd he is proud and confident, which is saying something sense most of us don't have that, I didn't until I was a sophmore when i finally just stopped caring what other people thought of me except those who are my best and closest friends.
I LOVED Kaiba's remark though! Kaiba is so right! All bullies are cowards at heart, they pick on the weak because tis the only way they can allow themselves to feel strong.
I absolutely love Mai as the school nurse! she was so in character, she does what she can to make a difference but is forced with the fact that Yami is too proud and stubborn to take action.
Again i love Yami: he's a proud nerd!
Good old grandpa! that sure made Yami's day a lot better! Good i was hoping you'd throw Yugi in this ;) nice to see he still made the chapter! Hope Yami has fun in Egypt! its still my dream to go there (hopefully when the war is over) by the way is this set on the Japanese school system? Cause they take their summer in the middle of the year and then have a winter vacation, and a short spring break between the end of the old year and beginning of the new cause the school year starts in april. I was wondering cause Yami said nine months until he never has to see Seto again, and summer is 3 and a half months and the regular school year in the States is ten months so i wanted to make sure.

I think you could have went further with this, added some chapters about Yami's experiences in Egypt and the growing relationship between Kaiba and Yami's new life, but overall, this was good. Great job!

That...was... AWESOME! It was a seriously perfect ending! I love how Tessa tried to hit on him... And I laughed when I read the part with Joey getting left behind. :D It was totally awesome. Great job!

I know all too well how you feel yami I may have not been beaten but. The girls at my HS were quite good dropping self esteem faster than a bomb but just you wait yami soon it will be time for your firework to go off and shut morons like your bully up keep up the great work gtg now ja ne

This is a pretty cool story, I really think you write another chapter because I'm curious to see what will happen next.

This was really good! I'm not really a fan of prideshipping- but I think I'll like this! And I LOVE the title.

Hmm... Yami as a geek? I'll admit- I've never seen THAT before. But that's what makes it interesting!

Totally fantastic super special awesome job! I can't wait to see what happens next!