from what I've seen so far, your idea as fine, the execution of this particular brand of child of artemis is what is lacking. no complaints about Grammer or spelling, as long as it can be read without being painful to a native reader that's all that matters, to start with, plot. needs work, your putting him into events that his presence changes and not changing them properly to account for the changes his actions bring, the simple fact of the matter is you could substitute Seth for just about anyone, a son of area, a daughter of Demeter, or any demigod really, and it wouldn't change the story in any real sense. you had a premise, son of Artemis, that's the only thing that would really be affected. by trying to force him into the plot that RR made the story, the plot, and the characterizations have suffered.
next piece of constructive criticism.
characterization. where to start. let's start with your mc. Seth has not been acting in a way that is difficult to empathize with, to start off let's go back to the roots, the orphanage fire, you spent little time on it, not a bad thing in itself but the aftereffects that got glossed over are more significant, Seth has had what he considers his family murdered before his eyes, he shouts a few liners, says he's mad, and then sorta moves on, gets in with his life, it's like his adoptive family wasn't murdered before his eyes, non of the shock is covered properly, none of the horror, none of the loss. most of the important character building bits are given a handful of sentences, then never examined or dealt with again, this is a problem and I'll come back to this. then there's Zoe, this is fan fiction, I don't care if she's different, or even if she resembles what she originally was, but she's been mangled, whatever your trying to do with her. she doesn't work and it's because the way the having her antagonize Seth is at odds with the role she plays in the hunters, her age, experience, and portrayal. you don't have to stick with how she was in the books l, but you need to tell us the reason why she's different, if not, it would probably be better to make an original character. your characterizations of the gods are off as well, but that's something that requires some discussion about the nature of gods in PJO, what motivates them, why, and what that means when you need to write them, but ultimately it's more subtle stuff compared to the way you mangled Zoe which is basic and easy to point out what's wrong.
If you want to become truly skilled at writing you must remember the Golden rule of writing, show not tell. in truth there's a balance between show and tell that needs to be done but you are doing too much telling and not enough showing. when you tell us that Seth cared about his buddy's at the orphanage your not showing it. he doesn't seem particularly torn up or upset about it, your showing one thing and telling another. when you say that Seth hates Artemis, your making a big deal about it but having him do very little about it. he's had some tantrums (I hate you mother), some more tantrums (if you want to be a murderer go join), but those are tantrums, not hate. there is a difference. if someone murdered my friend I would not be stopping with passive aggressive bitching, I would be sabotaging their efforts in any way I can (you've done this to an extent with Nico's sister), and in general trying to all around make their lives miserable. Seth has had his family figures brutally murdered, were I in his shoes I would be out for blood, attempting to get my enemies killed, and if they were unkillable I would be going after those close to them. reputation smearing, giving faulty goods, bad information, someone wants to hurt them? I'm going to give them information to make sure they succeed. I want them to hurt as much as I do and I'm not particular about how I do it. my family's dead, what else can they take from me that I care about. Zoe is supposed to be the leuitenant of the hunt, artemis second in command. she's not showing it. when she isn't being petty she's being cruel for no apparent reason, or reasons that are flismy at best. if you really want anyone to believe that Zoe is a leader she needs to act In a way that wouldn't inspire mutiny if you were under her command, if you want me to believe that she's 2000 years old then she at bare minimum must act better then a school child that wishes to hurt it's sibling by telling them a secret they heard mummy and daddy talk about.
honestly when I write stuff the best practice I use is to look at this stuff the next day and ask myself a question, does this make sense? and if the answer is no I revise.

Holy crap.

Yes! Calm Seth is best.

But if I'd Artimis was born first, why does Apollo claim she's his "little sis"?

Love the fics - I'm cheerfully rereading them now.

One minor but persistent annoyance: Zöe's bad grammar. When using "thou" instead of "you", "are" becomes "art", "do" becomes "dost", "have" becomes "hast" etc. Reading "thou is" is a bit nails-down-a-chalkboard.

The back-story here is that, back in the midle ages, English was like French or German: different rules for second person singular ("thou") and plural ("you"). However, as with French, people also used the plural as the super-polite version. Eventually there came a time where anyone on the receiving end of "thou" started to view it as a deliberate snub, and its usage almost entirely died out.

So if thou referest to someone as Zoe hath* tried to, but with better grammar, thou art being deliberately rude. Try it on thy schoolteachers, and let me know their reaction to thine subtle mockery.

* "Hath" and "doth" don't have funky back-stories; they're just archaic. Third-person singular FYI.

Great, ff-dot-net just loves mangling my posts.
I meant to say "conversations-slash-events"

I have to say that I really dislike it when authors rehash conversationsevents ad verbatim and only change the perspective.

For the poll, can Seth fall. in love with Reyna

Seth Claire

I stayed up until 5am reading this and woke up at noon. #NoRegrets

Firstly, Aphrodite. You're interpretation of her? Spectacular, wonderful, everything I hoped for. It always bothered me how much people interpreted her as a ditzy airheaded whore. Aphrodite is so much more than that to me. She is cunning, she is manipulative, she is unforgiving and she can fuck up your life big time. She is not to be made an enemy, and considering how much she wants to meddle with Seth's love life by trying to make him fall in love with somebody. It seems like if he makes the wrong move and ruins her plans, he will be in a whole lot of trouble.

For a pairing for Seth, is it weird that I kind of hate pairings? I don't mind Percabeth, they're too deeply embedded into the pjo canon to ignore. For Seth there really is no one I can see him with. Bianca is a possibility, you could flesh her put in many ways Rick Riordan couldn't since he killed her off. Another is Nico, since in canon he falls for the first person who saved him, which in this story could be Seth or Percy. Another is Clare, since Seth and her have that connection, and is the strongest possibility, since Aphrodite wants some tragic Romeo and Juliet story. And considering you're letting Seth join Kronos' Army, it's becoming a real possibility.

Speaking of joining the enemy, OH MY GOD YOU ACTUALLY DID IT. I was kind of expecting it, since you've made it such a big deal that the big three kids and Seth are always trying to be recruited and there are people coughClarecough who want him to join. It's interesting but also presents a different perspective. By the end of House of Hades, Percy started thinking about Luke and his action, and he understood them. He felt used by the gods, and Seth definitely relates to that. Seth has already been used by the gods, the way he is being treated is like some toy for their own amusement and even as a reader, it's completely infuriating! Why are you doing this? Why are you making him needlessly suffer? It's not a stretch in my mind to think that Seth light be tempted into really joining Kronos, but I still think he won't. Since his fatal flaw is his emotions, I think his love for his friends and family will overshadow his grudge against the gods. As shown by Seth deciding that he wouldn't go to save Artemis, but once he found out Percy and Thalia could be assassinated, Nyooom off he goes.

One tiny criticism of this fic is that you repeat scenes too much. You do try to change the perspective and mix it up a bit with the character's thoughts, but it becomes a bit tiring to reread everything we already know, and it kind of slows down the pacing of the story. I get what you were trying to go for, by showing everyone's views, misunderstandings and feelings about things. But it's just one thing that irks me.

I swear I could go on and on and on and on with how much I love your story. Apollo, the carefree but protective brother who secretly cares way too much about his sister and is an annoying uncle? Amazing, I love it. Your justification for why Artemis chose to "sacrifice" the orphanage, while is infuriating, makes sense. It really shows how Artemis does care for Seth, and that she wanted to protect him. The awkwardness between Seth and Artemis? Fantastic, give me that you're my mom but I still don't trust you because you could kill me conflict. Also, new character? The Di Angelo siblings are alive? The hunters and Seth are on better terms? THERE IS TOO MUCH.

But I wouldn't want to bore you, this review is too long and rambling as it is. I'm super excited about reading...everything. It's scary how fast I can burn through these fanfics but I'll enjoy them as they come. Keep it up! You're an amazing writer! Have a wonderful day!

that's like the catch phrase for all cool uncles!

I'm sorry I really am but this goddamned chapter infuriates me on so many levels basically all of Seth's problems could have been fixed if Artemis had just told the goddamn truth

Just for the record, Artemis never swore an oath. Rather she was given freedom by an oath Zeus swore to her per one of her three requests; a bow made of moonlight (which is ironically golden); a group of 60 virgin nymph to be her handmaidens (now the hunters); and Zeus to swear never to force or allow to be forced to marry or lose her virginity to a man. She can if she wishes, but she doesn't have to. As far as I remember, Athena never swore an oath either. Hestia was the only one to swear an actual oath of maidenhood.

Of course, you are way too far in this story to do anything about this, but just keep it in mind if you decide to start a new story.

Great writing so far!

Nice Harry Potter reference

my birthday is also December twenty should you make it a triple?