i hope they keep Rose and the moron (Edward) locked in the same cell together for at least five hundred years.

Edward was his usual drama queen self. Rosalie surprised me though.

oh crap, Charlie is Victoria's mate?

I'm getting the sense that Edward has broken. Not gonna be fun to deal with him later. I hope the other Cullens aren't punished too badly for Edward's screw up.

Uh, you probably already heard this, but your disclaimer seems to be wrong. It made me do a triple take before I realized that, yes, I was indeed reading 'I do not own Harry Potter' for a Twific. Is this on purpose?

I feel like I'm late on the uptake, but I'm getting a distinct 'Princess Diaries' vibe goin' on here... I'm right, aren't I? )

Nice story I read it in a go

A great ending to a wonderful story

the cullens were just to predictable for words.

how could a hair dryer burn bella if she's already a vampire?

edward is worthless to bella.

victoria's mate must be that rat edward, or maybe alec. either way she gets a "boy".

the lovely state of Akansas ? am missing something or did charlie move ?

Okay, I honestly can't read this anymore. It's not cliché, per se, but very predictable. Another reader said your characters had no character. I have to agree. There is no sustenance to them. They're just there to be there. I get from your A/N's that you're either in high school or college. If that's the case, you should have gone through English and Grammar classes. You also have a beta that should have gone through the same, yet the writing isn't up to par. You need a better beta and maybe some grammar courses for yourself. End of (hopefully) constructive criticism.

What I do like is that you have a good plot and a decent story line.

I hope you get better as you go.

Your characters can barely be called characters. None of them have any character! They’re all just going through the motions because you tell them to. They have zero personality which leads to a very very dull story. It’s like eating cake made without any form of sweetener.