Please update soon!
Please update soon!
Please update soon!
Please update soon!
Please update soon!
Please update soon!

This is probably the most wonderful, well written Loki x OC fanfics i have ever had the pleasure of reading. It doesn't seem as if you are continuing it, seeing as it was last updated about six months ago.
But still, it was an incredible read, and a rare find.
I hope you might pick it up again one day and decide to bring it back to life c:

love to read more

I enjoy your storyline. Your writing is lovely and wonderfully descriptive! I feel like you put and lot of time and effort into conveying all of the details and nailing the character's persona :)

I really liked your opening paragraph about blood. It was a fascinating to look at it, really, and I thought it was a nice lead in. Personally, I always prefer a bit of characterization before I'm plopped down in the plot, and I think you did a good job of combining both aspects here.

I also really liked all your hinting at their past - it makes me very curious as to what secrets Loki and this new character share. You build suspense very well here!

There are some typos you need to fix - you use "where" instead of "were," for example - and maybe a beta can help you fix some of your run-on sentences. Overall it's a great start, but these small errors are keeping your story from reaching it's true potential.

Great effort, and keep writing!

It's me again! I've been waiting for an update patiently. But I like your storyline that I have found out you did update hehe and must I say you did justice to the characters. i would imagine Stark would have a serious side aside from his "fun/silly/joker persona" so you did it quite well. And you did Banner spot on too! Im hoping chapter 5 would be up soon! i would love it if you continue this story. quite like your plot line... Will wait for the next chapter.

I came across your story and I like it. I like your plot line its original and different. Definitely liked the first chapters. I especially like your OC she is different from other OC's I don't think she is a mary sue. I hope you continue this story :) I'm dying to know what happened to her and I can't wait for LOKI to appear! ehehehe... Please update soon _

Wow, this is amazing. I never felt a strong connection to Black Widow, I thought she was a little distant. However, the way you write Natasha is very human, and it's endearing to me despite her toughness.

However, one thing that did jump out at me was your sentence structure. At times it is hard to follow because some of them are run-on. For example, the second sentence of the second chapter: "Natasha Romanov had just enough time to turn on her tracking device that would convey to the others that she needed back up before she was forced to flatten herself against the rough stone of the cave wall to avoid her opponent."

That was too much information all in one sentence, and my mind just couldn't process all of it. It would have made more sense if you broke it down into two sentences, made it more concise, or added some punctuation. For example,

"Natasha Romanov had just enough time to turn on her tracking device, conveying to the others that she needed back up before flattening herself against the rough stone of the cave wall to avoid her opponent."

I think that would make more sense.

One other thing I want to applaud you for is how well you captured the atmosphere in a foreign country, namely Pakistan. I've been to the middle east before, and at times it is exactly like you have described: "the shifting balance of power in volatile parts of the world, it was simple actually, a society at it's most appalling but a society none the less, and a heavily hierarchal one at that." Very good.

You've done a wonderful job of everything, and I'm interested in who this woman is and how she'll fit into S.H.I.E.L.D.

I quite like this story. Interesting storyline so far. And the fact that its well written (: I like how you don't put all information about your OC at once. Makes the reader interested in reading more and wanting to know more about your mysterious OC. But hoping to know her name soon and some background _... Will wait patiently for your next update ((:

This is pretty awesome. Hardcore character, I love it when OC's are broken and not total mary-sues. Can't wait for more!

Gory and intense - I loved it! I was actually frightened for poor Nat during that scene; you captured the deadly atmosphere perfectly.

Can't wait to see what transpired between chapters 1 and 2!

So I just read both chapters and I liked them a lot, but the second seemed drier than the first. And it almost seems like you're trying to write something profound.

Just write, let it flow, make it light! :)

Update soon?

Very good opening chapter, it has me interested :P

This is soooo coool so far! More please :D

This was a fabulous start; I can't wait to see what you have in store for us! You've set the scene wonderfully.