Could you reformat your story some? At least, this first chapter. Thanks.

This was a great second boom to the first. Looking forward to reading the third one. :)

This was actually a great fic that explored a lot of different character paths and emotions. Dont listen to flamers who are just out to make other people miserable. Too many people love this series! On to the next one!

I suggest shorter paragraphs. It can be hard on the eyes. Especially on a screen.

Well, the fic. feels much better without the ferret, and the slaves-but-not-too-much.

A bit better, but still so incoherent... the ferret freeing a mudblood slave in front of all his D.E. friends!... LOL ... The gentle murderer! LoL...

And if Hermione want to stay... it's easy, become Ron slave again.

Please, the character has a name: Pansy Parkinson... to use an offensive nickname to refer her in your fic, is totally ridiculos.

The Hermione-character can use it, but to be used in the fic. itself to refer the Pansy-character?... It can't be more Mary-Sue.

Honestly, at this point I had hope Hermione could be killed for her stupid behavior towards a 'Mistress'... but I had no luck.

And honestly, why had gone Pansy? For kill a slave? Ridiculos...

Honestly, I'm losing interest... way too Mary-sue, and way too incoherent/ridiculous with this 'slave' nonsense.

Wow! This Hermione is totally, absolutely and unbelieving id*ot!

Poor Draco... poor racist coward murderer!... It's a shame Harry didn't put his wand a bit higher and beheaded him!... Try to heal this, Sev! LOL

And Hermione? Talking nonsenses... Oh, yes... nobody is evil, one only do what must be done... a bit of murder, a little genocide, nothing evil!

This is a war, Draco tried to kill Harry, but he was better!... It's time for Hermione to see the reality, she is helping a racist coward murderer... who try to help his racist coward genocide father...

Well... typical... but how can Ron don't have other slave?... Are they accepting a pure-blood must make slave's tasks? LOL... It seems Ron is the slave and Hermione the Mistress... LOL!

LOL... This Ron-Hermione chat was very interesting!... It's clear Hermione thinks she can fool around with two boys, but when Ron make the same... she don't like it very much! lol... 'He wasn't engaged!' LOL! As she can marry Ron!... totally ridiculous!

As more chapters we see, more honest and moral seems Ron and more dishonest and non-moral seems Hermione... at this rate it wouldn't be a surprise if at the end she chose the dark side.

PD. Two little things.

Vold. Liking her soup? LOL!... VOLD. WOULD HAD SKINNED HER ALIVE FOR CONTAMINATE THE AIR WITH HER PRESENCE!

Change the name, because, seriously, slaves?... They must be the best treated slaves in all the world history!... At best (or worse) they are very well treated servants... this would be more accurate!... even the slitherins are a bunch of hippies! LOL

I'm reading this, and I must say the first book was much better than this!

In the I book, the slitherins were racist who tortured their masters... now, they are softies, and their slaves are treated as well as every other, if not better.

And Draco?... At this pace he will found the SPEW in no time!...

And Hermione?... She seems Jean D'arc! A bit Mary-Sue for my taste.

I hope this get better...

The first three paragraphs will put people only because it's solid black and white. People like the use of a new line. it makes it SO much easer to read. it may be the best story in the entire fan-fic library but it it strains the readers eyes they wont read it because its not worth it. Pleases don't take offence. I only want to improve what majestic talent you have.

Please use more paragraphing, it makes it really hard to appreciate your story which is otherwise quite compelling.

Hey, thanks for mentioning me! and thank YOU for sharing your talent with us! I'm really excited that the hunt is coming soon. I can't wait to find out how they will change the wizarding world, if Hermione will be going with them, and about Voldemort's interest in her! I'm still in shock of how perfectly written you managed their encounter during the holidays, it gave me goosebumps! And also, Hermione and Ron finally getting together! So please please please don't make us wait for the final instalment!

is there to be another?