I really liked this story. The plot was built up well, despite being a one-shot, and at the end there was a tiny bit of fluff, which is my favourite kind of Chelley. You did a very good job, thank-you :)

Also, thank-you for not making a story that revolves around someone's death/near-death experience :)

Poor Wheatley. :( The story has echoes of "What's happening to me?" pulsing through it.

The transformation from human to cyborg reminds me of the song "New Flesh" by Grendel. Look it up, it's one of my favorite songs.

But I love how you start off with him as a nervous, frustrated man trying to support himself (and his family), then as an unwilling test experiment, to the combination of machinery and organic parts clinging to his last shreds of humanity as he befriends Chell.

Wow!

I am so close to tears right now, this is beautiful (and you know, sad)

One of the other commenters made me think: are Apperture still sending out a pay check? Even after he's mostly machine and doesn't truly know who they are, I just can imagine this computer still sending out that paycheck until the day it runs out of gas or Aperture goes bankrupt. And that's a really sad thought.

Beautiful. I cried. Poor tormented Wheatley.

good good GOODO GODOOGODOOD GODOD

This turned out so sad and glorious 3 Well done! It was a treat to read.

Fantastic! Depressing, stirring, and near the end very cute and fuzzy. It's crazy the amount of emotion you managed to pack into such modest writing. Really well written.

Well, there goes cyborg Wheatley struggling to keep his humanity... Is it bad that I feel like laughing at him?

Oh, angst! Yes! I've been WAAYY too happy-go-lucky today. Time to dampen my spirits, because I think my friend's gonna kill me if I don't... Also, angst is my favorite type of atmosphere for a story. Excellent!

oh

my

GOOOOOOD

This is beautiful.

YAY ANGST. I can't help it, I like seeing people kicked in the face emotionally and you sure did that.

In particular, the way you describe the mechanical details of his body kills me. Wires under the skin, a coolant system, a respirator, a mind that's been prodded and virus'd and wiped clean, and constant pain. My poor baby, what have they done to you. D:

The backstory is equally heartbreaking. The idea that he's basically sold himself to Aperture to help out his family only to have them ultimately cut him off... man, you hit me right in the feelings.

The way he progresses mentally and his eventual rejection of humanity is well played out. What with being prodded, rejected, memory wiped and abandoned, you can see why he'd be bitter and his eventual betrayal upon gaining that much power is easy to understand (assuming that happens in this universe - I am just as happy to believe that they escape and live happily ever after and it might possibly be headcanon now).

THE END. AHHHHHH. Loved it. Minor Chelley is so often some of the best Chelley, just because there's so much potential waiting to unfold. The mental image of her studying his face, and the reminder that his heart is still organic - it does things to me and I like it.

Still loving all the Portal stuff you come out with. Please never stop.

GOS this was wonderful. i'm a total sucker for angsty Wheatley origin fics and this one hit the spot. absolutely heartbreaking, especially the parts where he realized he was losing memories of his family, and ultimately decided on no longer trying to contact them. heavy stuff man. very well executed though, good job. c: