Seems like there's some homosexual undertones here. I don't think that's canon for any of the Red Tails characters, so I'd guess that aspect is AU. Fighter pilots do NOT pick nicknames. That is not a part of military culture in the United States. You get a nickname picked for you, and it has to happen, to be earned somehow. You do not get issued one like you do uniforms and flight suits.

This was okay. You do show some talent as a writer, and the proofreading is good. But the story is lacking, just as the movie it is based on.

The men featured in "Red Tails" were actually known as the 332nd Fighter Squadron, one of two main units that are referred to when the term "Tuskeegee Airmen" is used.

You display some notable literary flair in this chapter. Some good choices of words here and there. Looks like this is referring to more than just actual free-fall, which, if you never deploy your parachute or do not have one- or it does not work- is a terrifying fall to a swift death. This was an interesting Prologue to read.

There is no actual need to note you do not own the original work or characters. I include a general thing on that on my page, but it isn't legally binding if you include that. None of us are about to get sued anyway. There is no reason to fear that unless you attempt to get this printed and published. I hope you take negative criticism into account and don't just label anything that isn't praise as "flames". This has to be the shortest Chapter 1 I have ever read. It really could have just been an introductory paragraph included in the next chapter. Now, with all that out of the way, onwards.

This is really good. With that being said, I'm really not surprised its not getting reviews just because I think black males and homosexuality is always going to be one of those taboos that people just don't get , or want to think about.

However, it is really really good and I'm so sorry people arent really reviewing it because you're writing style is very descriptive and I think it really has potential.

I think you should finish it for yourself if anything but just know that it really does have potential so don't feel too discouraged even though this is a year later