Johan IS the father in here and Judai is the mother, right?

I don't suppose there's gonna be any mention of the different dimension incident? 'Cause it'd be funny if Jesse had had time to grab a bag and his other outfit came out of it. You know, the one he wore while he was possessed.

I like it, it's so cute and fluffy. I understand the procrastination, I deal with it too and self confidence issues. Do what you can short chapters are better than no chapters )

Yay new chappy that was a nice little scene between Jaden and Jesse. I have no idea how I would react to the whole parents making a bet about you thing

There's a genuine sweetness in this writing that I find extremely intriguing. So far, I really am enjoying this story.

I my favorite scene thus far would have to have been the couch swing in chapter 4. Just Jaden and Jesse, sitting there in that swing in the spring breeze, surrounded by all those flowers... it just gives me happy shivers just imagining it! And then Jaden gently slipping his hand into Jesse's just made it all the better. The tender romance if that small portion just warmed my heart.

Just a note, before you publish your future chapters, I strongly suggest going through your writing and checking for grammar and spelling mistakes. Also, having someone else read your work beforehand can work very well too.

The story you have out so far is pretty good. I thought that you had stopped writing it, so I was sad for a bit. But seeing that you haven't finished with it yet makes me happy! I am excited to see your future works, and I will try to review it as much as possible. If you ever want to contact me, send Warriorsstone a message. I don't have an account on here and she's a friend of mine. Warriorsstone will be able to transfer it to me.

I'll be watching
-A

UPDATE!

like itt

are you going further:D
i like it

loving it!

Aw! So cute! :3

Awh! I love the way that they're positioned! It's so cute!

I strongly suggest you either mark this as AU or...something. Because "spring break" would imply it's after the events of Dark World, but no one's acting in any way like that happened. No character development or anything. Not to mention, how *could* Juudai tell his parents about Johan? He only met him at the start of third year and there's never really been any indication Juudai is close to his parents, since they *did* work a lot when he was younger. (Episode 131 shows that, you know).

Where are the duel spirits? Juudai and Johan live and breathe those as much as they do dueling but there's not even a mention of Hane Kuriboh or Ruby Carbuncle or anything.

Overall, it reads more like they're kids going to a normal high school instead of a pair of incredible duelists who save the world and/or put it into serious danger. That's part of what makes them who they are, you know.

love your story write on

Love this keep on writing

Hey I loved this please write more need to how the rest your the best