I love this so much! One of the funniest hp things I have ever read! Please, please, PLEASE update!

God...THE CRACK! Update soon okay! 33

[Ginny had found the chainsaw.]

You guys CANNOT possibly stop there!

[As the sun rose further into the sky, shadows vanished from the tabletop, like the cheap, atmospheric tools of a hack writer trying to emphasize a moment of revelation. By now, however, she was only half listening to the Headmaster's words. Dumbledore may be old and puissant, but he didn't half go on at times. It was almost as if somebody were needlessly dragging out his confession in order to increase dramatic tension.]

I greatly respect JK Rowling for introducing us to Harry Potter and his world, but you can still respect an author while disagreeing or finding things not to your liking in her novels. I found myself increasingly frowning throughout the duration of reading OotP for the first time years ago. It was full of heightened melodrama and honestly, entirely too much self-pity and teenage angst. I was the same age as the character of Harry Potter would have been in that book and even I, as a moody teenager, was annoyed by how ridiculously Harry wallowed in self-pity.

Also, there's some other things that I never quite understood about her series; they mostly included abandoned or forgotten plot-holes. One of the biggest is of Hagrid's brother Gwarp who served little to no purpose towards the advancement of the plot and was promptly never mentioned again.

Another was Ginny's entire character arc. We know from CoS, that Horcrux!Tom Riddle put some of HIS soul in HER and vice versa:

"So Ginny poured her soul out to me, and her soul happened to be exactly what I wanted…I grew stronger on a diet of her deepest fears, her darkest secrets. I grew powerful, far more powerful than little Miss Weasely. Powerful enough to start feeding Miss Weasely a few of my secrets, to start pouring a little of my soul back into her…" - Tom Riddle [Harry Potter & the Chamber of Secrets]

A mere MEMORY of a younger Voldemort entrapped as a horcrux, no less, was able to grow powerful from Ginny entrusting him with her "deepest fears, her darkest secrets", literally pouring out her heart and soul into the diary. I can only assume that Tom "pouring a little of [his] soul back into her" meant that he grew powerful enough to take possession of her body to do his bidding, such as opening the CoS and letting the basilisk loose.
Not once, however, do we get a glimpse of how the events of CoS have affected Ginny Weasley. Tom Riddle, at least the one in the diary, had manipulated Ginny (who she thought of as her best friend at the time) into doing terrible, horrible things. She must have been traumatized, and we never hear much of that. Actually, we never do.
We then get a glimpse of what Snape and Dumbledore say about Dark Magic:

"The Dark Arts are many, varied, ever-changing, and eternal. Fighting them is like fighting a many-headed monster, which, each time a neck is severed, sprouts a head even fiercer and cleverer than before. You are fighting that which is unfixed, mutating, indestructible." - Severus Snape

"True. But magic, especially dark magic, leaves traces … and I think perhaps I may have found another." - Dumbledore [HP & the Half-Blood Prince]

So if Dark Magic, especially Dark Magic of the worst kind-of horcruxes, leave "traces" and fighting them is fighting something that is "mutating" or "indestructible", then wouldn't this suggest that Ginny Weasley, somewhere inside her, would be somehow marked or even marred by such an encounter besides the psychological trauma itself?

I always felt like JK Rowling gypped us a bit with allowing a character like Ginny Weasley to do such dark things, and later by her 5th year, transforming her (without any explication whatsoever to the readers) into an extremely popular, pretty girl who would eventually end up as Harry's wife. JK Rowling herself said that Ginny Weasley was the first girl to be born of the Weasley line in GENERATIONS and that "there's that old tradition of the seventh daughter of a seventh daughter and a seventh son of a seventh son, so that's why she's the seventh, because she is a gifted witch. I think you get hints of that, because she does some pretty impressive stuff here and there..." But do we? Hardly. We know she performs the best bat-bogey hex around, which is pretty telling considering no one in the HP world has been said to produce the best "jinx, hex or curse" (besides Voldemort)- all three of which are considered "dark magic". It's all a biiiit too tidy for my liking...too hurriedly swept under the rug.

I totally digressed. ANYWAYS, back to your story.

["By which you presumably mean the privileged few who reap the rewards of such a system to the inevitable detriment of the downtrodden masses?" Ginny shot back. "I've never heard such bourgeois twaddle! Your supposed patriotic system creates class distinction in the place of a unity, inevitably leading to the fall of such a system at the hands of the repressed. When a ruling class subjugates the labor and free will of a society it destabilizes the entire system and loses legitimacy."]

Get it, gurrrrll.

["There is nothing worse than having your reality warped by Tolstoy, Dumbledore!" snarled Voldemort. "You are quite wrong, said Dumbledore. "Indeed, your failure to understand that there are things much worse than Tolstoy has always been your greatest weakness."]

LOL thank you for mirroring every possible dramatic scenario to have presented itself in OotP, by nicely fitting them into this chapter. Brilliant.

[Upon further reading they found that the manifesto, penned by Ginny Weasley, was a terrifying declaration that had the household describing Ginny as a mixture of Karl Marx's ideology, Charles Manson's charisma, and Anne Robinson's sadism.]

["We all have to pull our weight for this house share to succeed and become a super power. Ron, you are assigned the task of splicing the cable so we get all the channels. I need the local access network to keep up on house share politics."]

["You're fighting the good fight, comrade." Hugging him, the mini-dictator nodded solemnly. Then he ran for his life. At the stove Sirius started tapping a spatula against the counter top, humming 'Deutschland Deutschland Uber Alles' under his breath.]

["You haven't got a sister!" Retorted Ginny. "And religion is the opiate of the masses!" This would have sounded more impressive if she hadn't been wearing a clip on moustache.]

You guys simply must continue this story. Please, please, please? I don't think I've ever loved a HP fanfic this much in my life.

[Draco made a face like he was about to be sick, then gestured right behind Ginny and yelled "Snake!" Ginny squealed and ran forwards at top speed. Quildemort, who chose that moment to step out of the bathroom, clad only in a towel, connected solidly with her and they both went down in a storm of limbs. Draco took advantage of the confusion to nip inside the bathroom and lock the door. Ginny was last seen running blindly down the stairs with Quildemort's towel flapping from the top of her head.]

Obsessed with your ginny.

I don't think you both are aware of how incredibly euphoric I am to have stumbled upon this fanfic.

[Nodding, Snape looked back toward the cauldron. "Chocolate cake."
"Snake?" The shrieking form of Ginny Weasley tore out of the broom closet, sending dustpans and push brooms flying across the kitchen floor. ]
I can't...I can't even...your Ginny is the best. THE best. She's HILARIOUS.

["It's sad what's happening to Ginny," Draco told the cameras in the diary room later that evening.]
HAHAHAHA I had to do a double-take on that one and re-read the sentence because I was sure I had read it wrong and then I literally choked on my coffee. How MTV "Real World" of you hahaha.

What is the www. Part? I'd like to know so I can do all that fun stuff?

/bunkbeds?

I think this is some of the funniest work I've ever read in my life, and whoever you are who's telling the auther to take this story down, you can shove it up your butt. If you don't like it, tough cookies, but don't you tell someone else what to do just because you have no sense of humor. This essay should get more chapters of goodness, I think. Thank you for the hilarious fanfic.

You're without a doubt one of the most retarded persons to ever being born. Please take down this shit, while thinking what mistake made your parent's when they decided to burden humanity with your pitiful presense

Oh my god! This story is epically amazing, transcending all defining characteristics of said epicness!

You're leaving it off THERE?

I love this story; it's probably one of the best Harry Potter parodies I've read in a long time. Congratulations.

Oh. And Malfoy's dresses are priceless XD

...

Malfoy.

In a drag.

Oh god.

I just about died.

Ah! The horror!