Hi!
I just stumbled upon your story! I really like Lily/Scorpius, so I'm glad that I found yours!
I'm looking forward to more!

I missed this story, the chapter was perfect. Keep writing ...

about that time i would rush
out of the Great Hall to find them.

Lily and Scorpius need to find a broom closet.
or an empty classroom.
sort their stuff out.

what the hell is up with Ivy?

add on! add on! add on! add on! add on! add on! add on! add on! add on! add on! add on! add on! add on! add on! add on! add on! add on! add on! add on! add on!

Great update - i hope Lily sorts herself out soon

I really liked the Daddy-daughter-scene :)

Good job :)

Im curious to whatll come next :)

Nimea

Very good ... I love this couple .. Keep writing ...

i cant wait for the next chapter.
when she gets to the platform
for her to find him
walk right up to him
(tap him if he isnt looking)
and kiss him.
in front of everyone.
throw caution to the wind
and just do it.

thats what i want to happen.

please dont let that last line
be foreshadowing the opposite.
please.

Dear L May,

Might I just say, I truely adore your story! It's got all these twists and turns and interesting bits that make you wanna giggle in delight and laugh out loud. Your plot so far is fabulous! There are these little secrets and questions that you bring in, intriguing the reader and making them want to read more. I like you characterisations, espescially of Scorpious, Lilly, Hugo and Albus. I also think that the way you brought your OC characters in was quite smart, ingenious even. All you characters are well-balanced and not too Mary Sue, Gary Stu. They work well with your story. You write for your characters in a way that they've all got a different personality, which is good, and some writers don't manage.

Now for the critiques ('cus even though they can be mean, critiques are helpful and can help you get better. Sorry if some of them offend you in any way.) So, I know how we all love our characters to look good and be beautiful. The problem is, we can't let ALL of our characters be that way. You've described every girl so far in a way that makes her sound perfect. It's simply not realistic, and could make some people feel insecure. Just have a normal girl here and there would balance it out.

As for grammar and spelling, you just need a beta. I don't know if English is your mother tongue, or if you're simply learning it, but you have a few mistakes. This isn't bad, as I'm sure most of them are simply typos and everybody makes mistakes, espescially when writing. Hell, whenever I write something, I have to read through it twice before I find most of the mistakes, and then I usually only find them all once it's already been posted. So, just a suggestion, get yourself a good beta, who likes to read, has read the HP books so they can give you advice, and who knows their way around spelling and grammar. You fix that part up and your story is simply brilliant, even more so than it is now.

If you'd have me, I'd be honored to be your beta! But it's your choice, and I shan't push. :) Anyhow, adore your story and really happy I decided to read it.

Waiting anxiously for the next chapter,

Anelya

Great story. I usually don't leave such a short review, but I can't really find anything for you to improve on. It's an AMAZING story. :)

I just loved this chapter, i hope for more L/S soon.

What is wrong with Al?

im torn.
either Teddy was going to say
Scorpius is going to be there
or
Teddy and Vic are expecting...

i am a little upset Scorpius ran off.

I sort of forgot to add: I love Ivy and your other "friend-characters", but Ivys the cutest :)))
Sorry, for reviewing anonymous, but I just signed up, so from now on I can follow you "legally" ;)
Keep going, I cant wait to read more! :)
XX Nimea

Hey there :)
I really liked this chappy :) Aaaaand I nearly fell off my bed cause I was laughing so hard about Al :D
Great chapter - Im really excited about what Lilys going to do. And - I love the idea with the origami-stuff, its sooooo cute :))))
Keep goin, its awesome!
Nimea

Great chapter! They finally kissed, YAY!