Work on your English. Stop putting random Japanese words in the middle of your story. Stop writing childish author notes.

a fuming irate pissed off satan and son videl hissing saying to her boyfriend and husband sayianman care to explain why our daughter who has not even born yet is doing in our high school when we are teenagers and no fading out flying running away from me son gohan you get back here now

lol sayianman hissing to his girlfriend and wife i did something bad in a past life and i am being punish now i think i will wrap meat all over my body and then lock myself in a Hungary lion panther lynx bobcat or tiger cage oh look there is a meg i will go interface myself satan and son videl hissing saying shouting telling yelling at to her boyfriend son gohan you stop that right now it will be ok

Cute and funny. I like that you didn't just magically have Gohan and Videl fall in love instantly just cause they found out about Pan, it was a nice touch. I giggled through most of it.

genius!~~~~~~~

you know whooo. XD

Chichi's pan had me laughing so hard

Considering both how powerful Gohan is and how hard the avrage saiyan head is i think the rocks that hit mim are the ones hurting.

Super conseils Chichi! Hahahaha! Il m'a bien fait rire ce chapitre!

The DB calendar uses the Age dating system. Since they don't have a Jesus, they don't go by the B.C./A.D system.

Principal should not be confused with principle. Principle is always a noun, which is sometimes erroneously used with the meaning of the adjective principal.

Incorrect: He is the principle of the school
Correct: He is the principal of the school

The fact your story has this kind of error this early on, does not inspire much confidence to read the rest of it.

The immortal pulled out his notepad that clearly read, 'Things To Do List' and wrote on it, 'Call Enma-sama and request new Kami after Son Gohan murders Dende.'

Pecking order!

Bro, as much as I have to agree that school lunches are godawfull, (for fuck sake, you can't even tell what they're supposed to be half the time, let alone what they're made out of) but blaming the lunch ladies is ridiculous. Every single one of those meals comes freeze-dried and pre packaged, and given the opportunity, the cafeteria team will usually try and improve them any way they can, although given the number of kids they're cooking for this is often not possible.

I gave up on reading this when you brought GT into it. It was okay until you did that; then everything felt way too over the top.

Trop drôle dommage qu'elle soit en anglais .