its really sad, but a happy ending at the same time. why did ryou, shin akira have to die? May, i somewhat understand.

I absolutely love this story, the only thing I have to criticize is your over and improper use of “. . .”. You put it where it’s unnecessary, or where a comma should be placed. Other than that and a few grammatical and technical errors, I think you have the makings of a great story-teller. Keep up the great work !

Not to be nit picky because I think you’re a pretty good writer but dis-respondent isn’t a proper word. The correct word to use would be wordslike unresponsive or despondent. So that’s it I hope I haven’t offended you because I understand some people can get really upset when called for their grammar and my intent is not to be cruel; I just really love English

That was an intense story

I came late to this site and only found this a couple of days ago.

This was a very enjoyable read. I do plan on reading your other Ghost Hunt stories as well!

Structuring...your sentences...like this...is very...distracting! No, but seriously it's a good story so far. I like the twist in Mai's backstory. Naru and the rest of them seem on point character-wise except Mai, who I get the impression is a little more mature than she's portrayed usually - well, it has been a year or so. I am very curious to see how this case all ties into Mai's past. The story itself has a good tempo. I'll probably review again when I've finished reading to the end.

Kawiiiiiiiii!

Soo adoreable

Me! I'm a fan of Bou-San x Mai!

Guess I misunderstood about the Bou-San thing at least in terms of the moment already happening but that's fine lol. Felt a *little* sudden that he would confess like that but at the same time when emotions are already running high it could happen. Also she'd already told him she loves him so from her it made sense. Also Gene showing up and smacking him upside the head was funny.

Wow! So much pain to carry on your own, how sad! But really good tying everything together. Curious if the man is the same guy.

I like the idea of Bou-San and Mai so I'm all for a sweet/romantic moment especially if it irritates Naru lol.

I like the changes you've given to Mai, especially her telling Naru off since he was such an asshat to her. Enjoying the story so far, the mystery has me in the edge of my seat!

Just reading that part where you explain all the equipment made me think about Ghost adventures. and major cock block for Naru. lol

THAT'S SOOO~ FUCKING HILARIOUS,SAD,AND CUTE~