I don’t know if I’m imaging things but if you purposely put Wizards of Waverley Place in here I love it!

You do realize that there no such thing as CC breasts, right?

You know it's a shame you don't do Older women in your stories as I love the fics I have read from you and would have loved to see you do something with Harry and Tonks together.

Alex and Justin Russo

started off good then it just got full of bad jokes and puns

Perseus and Annabeth Potter... Really?

Good story just not my style of writing also it's hard to know when your story begins after your comments on previous posts should just pm them personally other readers don't give a damn about it because we don't know the context of what your commenting on and I'll be damned if I'm going through the back log of comments just to find out

This could have been an interesting story if the writing was better

ho god... that naruto referrence was terrible lmao

I like the concept but the editing is not final draft caliber and the author's notes are far too long for my taste. I didn't read in depth beyond the fourth chapter. I skimmed the rest of the story to see if it would improve and was disappointed. I would not recommend.

Ok I have not even started just wanted to answer this to some people wills are confidential but only till certain conditions are met which may or may not be death the only difference a will for a living person may not be proceeded with if requested so

Why are you having the Will read when Sirius isn't dead? That doesn't happen. Wills are confidential, even to beneficiaries like Harry and Hermione, until they go into effect. After Sirius died.

If you needed Harry to be the Black heir for the harem just have the goblins tell Harry that Sirius appointed him. That information is rarely confidential and is often announced publically. Otherwise good work.

Story is confusing but I’ Still reading and trying to follow the plot.

Made it about two more chapters before tapping out. One of the easiest ways to improve your writing is to let it sit for a little bit and then go back to check it over with a fresh view. Clearly this person had their nose on the page. Whole thing seems to be held together by references, ignorance of how to write basic sentences, and apathy towards basic human logic.

Basically it’s written like 90% of anime. Go figure

Honestly can’t stand the jarring references to Naruto characters. They serve no purpose other than as references. I’m fine with the occasional reference here and there, but just naming at least five completely unimportant characters after Naruto is annoying. Especially as I had yet to even get to the third chapter.

Dialogue was fine in its content and meaning, but worded very confusingly organized and flowed unnaturally. Again, just the first two chapters.

It’s also quite annoying when every other sentence is put in parentheses. They are being completely misused in favor of taking the time to properly write out sentences.

Obviously not expecting gold standard writing on this website. There are clearly plenty of people who like the constant references and don’t really notice the poor writing. I do, but also can tell the story itself here is worth reading.

Hopefully after a few more chapters the author begins to focus on the story more instead of maymay references to other fandoms.