Hey is it cool if I can use this for my wattpad account

I wanted to like this I really did but the way its written just kills it. Its written in a away that instead of telling a story it feels like your just retelling a story you heard and are glossing over or forgetting a ton of details. Too much detail can make a story dry and boring too little can make it underwhelming, kill any feeling you were trying to go for

That was the BEST story I ever read like EVER
I jus love the action and the sex scene especially albedo and Lance
I really love it.

I really enjoy this. It was quite interesting if you know what I mean. I also read this in 3 days and I enjoy every minute of it. Kevin is such a perv. Of always wanting Ben it was to much to me but I like your story line. It's a great story. Keep up the great work. Glad to read future stories of yours.

hk

He would have gone to jail for essentially owning and trying to air what is basically child pornography on tv. Seriously that guy is a menace and an idiot. Hopefully Cash gets what's coming to him.
-SilentSnowLeopardNinja

Why isn't that guy sued for character defamation of a minor? For showing clips and pictures of a minor without consent or payment on a news channel? Those are legit concerns and reasons for him to lose his job. And Julie suddenly being a bitch is out of nowhere. So is the thought of everybody turning on Ben just cuz he's gay and about to have a family due to one of the alien forms that make him able to continuously save their lives for almost a damn decade.

Well...it isn't much but it's better than no explanation I guess. Pretty weak though.
-SilentSnowLeopardNinja

Really? Ben was already figuring it out before the so-called reveal. Infact he was just about to ask before getting attacked. Now...don't get me wrong this story is cute so far and interesting enough to keep me reading with some great funny moments BUT that doesn't change the fact that there are a few things going on that irks me due to the lack of logic and explanation.
-SilentSnowLeopardNinja

Really? No explanation on what the hell Kevin is up to?
-SilentSnowLeopardNinja

Ok...WHY THE FUCK IS HE PRETENDING TO BE SOMEONE ELSE?! The whole point of finding Ben was to let him know what happened and to get help on knowing his capabilities and how to look human again. He even found out that Ben is gay and might actually like him. So what the actual fuck?!
-SilentSnowLeopardNinja

Man this chapter made me really hungry -sigh- my gram used to make a lot of that.

these people are just not careful I swear -" dying of laughter again!

I know you're on chapter 68(?) and I'm on chapter 14 right now but future reference to edit maybe, perhaps you could add who is talking? It's okay to have quick dialog without and names or description but when you have multiple people, it's unclear who is talking or how. For example when there was the quick discussion at the dinner table, I noticed Ben talking, the aunt? And I think his mom interjected, wasn't sure. It's good to add who said what in those cases c': it's a great story so far

I was sooooo hoping they weren't just making out in the middle of school with people. omfg I nearly choked and died of laughter when I realized they were..