At least you should read JLA vs Avengers comics before writing this story, in there it is shown how powerful Superman is and how he handled most of the avengers.

Very nice. Is amazing you history. Follow you

Excellent

Superman in this story is way depowered. I understand in order to make Marvel characters win, you have to some depowered Superman's powers. But this is off. Superman has tactile kinesis, speed, and resilience to prevent him from being injure. It seems like Superman can be easily defeated in this story.

It seems strange that one strike from Thor can knock Superman out. Superman has tactile kinesis, which enables him to build armor around himself, preventing him from being hurt.

You really seem to be significantly underestimating Thor here... as well as Iron Man who can boost his strength to similar levels provided an adequate source of power for his suit.

Pretty sure Superman would be as happy with them as he is in this. Being tricked is one thing but not giving him one chance to explain things leading to multiple deaths of civilians is just being stupid and irresponsible.

Damn good story. Crazy how many characters you managed to mesh well together. I really enjoyed the fight between Supes and the Avengers. Great job!

This story was amazing. I love the way you've developed the plot and how the characters were developed. I hope that one day I can write something as well as you have. I'm familiar with these heroes, but I haven't actually read the comics but I was able to follow the story quite well. You're very talented!

Okay, so obviously I'm going to continue reading your story. So why am I reviewing already? Because this story is seriously great. I love the way you have written the characters and I felt my heart clench when I realized that Lex is being his manipulative self. This story is really great! Now I'm going to continue reading...

Okay. In depth review.

First off - Plot, good, a little formulaic, but well executed.

Second - Writing. Spelling: It's a little wobbly, but overall well done. Grammar: Jarringly bad at points, but not disastrous. However, random capitalisations, dodgy sentence structure and occasional running together of words are rather annoying for the average reader and give them a bad impression of your fic. This can easily be solved by a good beta.

Third - Prose. Average. At best. I'm sorry, but it needs work. Good and great prose really flows, and lets the reader follow the story quickly and easily. If they have to stop to decipher what you're saying, which I had to at points, you're doing something wrong.

Four - Notes. Okay, a little petty, but could you at least italicise or bold your notes? It can be a little difficult to distinguish them from the main text.

Five - Length. I honestly feel that this could have gone on for another ten chapters at least. And long ones. Like, 4000 words plus per chapter. You could have shown us in depth reactions by the Marvel characters to Superman's vast power. Remember, they've only encountered this level of raw power in Thor, Hulk, X-Man, the Sentry and the Silver Surfer, etc. Tony's a paranoiac, and even backed up by Thor - Hawkeye's useless against Superman unless he has a magic/kryptonite arrow - he'd be very troubled by Superman. I mean, it would be nice to get a look at how SHIELD and the Avengers et al see this new power house, who they know nothing about, other than that he is incredibly dangerous.

Speaking of the Avengers, where do the rest of them come from? They appear apparently out of the wood work, without warning. Also, it's a Quinjet, not an Avenjet - or maybe not, since you referenced the X-Men and that suggests it's one of their old Blackbirds. And Superman is NOT tough enough to damage Cap's SHIELD. The only person who has managed to break the real thing was the Serpent, who was basically Odin's brother, with all the power that entails, as well as being powered up by the fear of the entire world, putting him in his physical prime and giving a vast upgrade. Superman's skull is tough, but not tough enough to dent the shield.

You could have expanded the fight scenes, given Superman a chance to flex his muscles and Thor a chance to take on someone who is really and truly on his level. And considering the time period, I'm surprised you didn't bring up the Sentry.

He's Marvel's answer to Superman, and if Luthor had found out about him/got his metaphorical claws into him, as he would have if he'd had a poke around the databases, he'd either be able to draw on his example to show why Superman can't be trusted, or set him on Superman. And if someone like Luthor managed to get him to unleash his full power, with Superman in the state he was in, Superman would have been in serious trouble. As would the rest of the universe.

Doctor Manhattan. Okay, cool, but he seemed like a bit of a cop out and a Deus Ex Machina. His appearance was completely unheralded (not too surprising, I suppose, considering the character) and unnecessary. I mean, travelling between universes isn't exactly beyond Marvel's numerous genii. Hell, Thor just has to spin his hammer fast enough and he can break through. That said, I liked his references to the Monitors.

My final problem is continuity. Which one are you using? When is it set in said continuity? This isn't made clear, and with the number of major events Marvel has, it wouldn't have been hard to sign post it by referencing one of them, say, the Skrull Invasion. I mean, some elements seemed like the Marvel Films, but others were pure comics. As for DC, some elements seemed pure comics, others from the DCAU, some from Smallville.

Overall, however, this has the makings of a very good fic and a very interesting fic series. Characterisation was, in the case of many characters, spot on, even if you didn't expand on them. I might take issue with Spidey's instant fanboying, and surprising casualness about letting people see who he is under the mask. I mean, this is a guy who is famous in universe for being EXTREMELY protective of his secret identity. When he unmasks during 'Civil War', it is noted as a major publicity coup for the Pro Registration side precisely because he is so protective of his identity. But he was largely in character, and you nailed the others. Except Thor's anger issues aren't quite that bad. The plot hook with Lex as Agent 14 was very interesting - whatever will he do next? And it would be interesting to see the Avengers play fish out of water in the DC universe.

Also, some of the dialogue was very snappy and downright brilliant. I loved the chat about the 'Avenjet' and its history, as well as Spidey's crack about not leaving Luke off the suspect list if he disappears suddenly.

But. And this is a big but. It is flawed. It is unpolished. It is a diamond in the rough with the emphasis on the rough. You skate over far too much in the rush to the ending. You tell instead of showing. Take your time, flesh it out a little, filter out the mistakes. I mean, Superman and Spider-Man could have bonded over so much - supportive wives, jobs in journalism with difficult Chief Editors...

hahahahahahaha are you telling me for such a dangerous guy they couldnt have xavier change his memories...hahahah your story started out as bs with clarks assumption of tony being a stoogy of LL...hahah fucking hilarious

Just a brief disclaimer that I'm going into this one completely fandom blind. :)

Ah, I really like the fact that you started us off with an Alexandre Dumas quote. I'm always a really big fan of people using quotes to start off chapters because it's such an excellent way to set the tone. And I do so love Alexandre Dumas.

"...when he did she might have..." should have a comma after "did"

"...personal project;" should either be a colon or a comma. It did also strike me that you used the word "personal" twice in the same sentence, so you might want to consider mixing it up a bit, just to keep it fresh.

I liked the way that you wrote the scene with Lex. I wasn't expecting it to get so violent, so kudos to you for the element of surprise. He seems like an interesting character, and this does remind me of what I would consider to be a good beginning to a superhero story.

"IronMans jets kicked..." should have an apostrophe to show that he owned the jets.

An interesting beginning, although I think that it might be worth your time to slow down and create a little bit more in the way of sensory detail to help draw your readers in. I find that setting the scene, even if it's only a couple of sentences, can really make all the difference. Overall, well done and good luck in the future!

Cheers, dearie!

This story is nonsense. Superman attacked them first, fried Tony's heart, and fights other heroes, yet you expect us to buy into the whole "I'm the good guy thing." The avengers did nothing but protect their world. And do your research, modern hulk does not target civilians. Everyone here is out of character.

Not a bad begging, I give props for the characters actually seeming to be real people.
www. /