holy shit, your like a shakespear without weird words

Wait... Levin wears Ludroth armor?

*Looks it up*

OH MY FUCKING GOD THAT LOOKS SO STUPID! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

"At this rate my next few chapters will end up being 12k words!"

*Side eyes the 1,188,911 word count.*

Hmm...

Oof, the Alatreon lost a bit of his intimidating factor when he started throwing a tantrum over Levin leaving. It was hilarious when I imagined it though. Wonder why he didn't just force Levin to keep fighting him. Hard to ignore him then.
I kept expecting the Alatreon to gun for Ellie the whole time since he wanted her dead so much. Or when he realized Levin was leaving because of her. *Oh, the girl is keeping you from fighting me? Well, then why don't I just take of her for you?* Levin could have wanted to fight him if he also killed his lover as well as his family. Though I can see why. I can't think of anyway he could be stopped if he decided to do any of that. Still bugs me though.

I began reading this story when it was only around 20 chapters or so all those years ago, and had fervently followed on updates every month. Each chapter was a rollercoaster of emotions and thoughts to ponder on. "What would happen to this character? What would happen next?" I was literally on my seat the whole time I kept up in reading this story. Five years since it finished, with me feeling a weird sense of completion and satisfaction together with the characters, and my love for the franchise would only grow stronger.

Five years later, and I decided to revisit this grand tale. It was just as good and satisfying as I remember it. If I could, I'd promote this story to Capcom themselves because of how good of a read i always found this story to be, but I guess that could just be my biases speaking. With Monster Hunter World released in the previous year, and with its Iceborne expansion coming around near the end of the year, my desire to delve back into this was brought back and I'm glad I took the time to give it another read. I'll no doubt be reading what sequel you've cooked up thus far soon enough. Props to you, dear author.

I've been reading this story since my junior year on and off, and through a hurricane that hit my town last October 10th. The only thing I had the signal to see, really. Now it's more then half a year later, towns still ruined...but I've managed to finish the read. Feels good

Whoo hoo! Finally finished! Was surprised when you responded to my earlier email, but I think it's cool you still respond to reviewers for a long finished story. Now, on to the review!

What I liked (from most liked down):

- The fights. You are amazing at writing fight scenes that feel like what I always imagined epic Monster Hunter battles would look like in a well animated/choreographed anime or a manga with good art. You made even fights with less visually impressive monsters like the Great Jaggi and the Gobul entertaining, and for that you deserve all the pats on the back! Fight scenes in fanfiction are hard, but yours were great.

- The World Building. I'm a sucker for fanfics that add little details about the setting sprinkled throughout the story, especially when there is payoff later on (like Frost Town getting it's periodic snow from the Alatreon's icicle rain attack).

- How everything was interconnected. A lot of side characters who seemed irrelevant, or details that seemed unimportant, eventually all came together in the end in unexpected ways. Some writers make that feel forced and it can be annoying, but I enjoyed it here.

- Likeable side characters. Nox, despite his inconsistent writing, was funny. Tenebris felt like a cool big sis. Richard Jr felt like the only adult on the team until Jino got added, and Kai and Kei were amusing. Even Silas was interesting and more than one-dimensional.

What I Disliked (from most hated to minor nuisance):

- Villain Decay. Dear God, did this fic suffer from epic villain decay. The Alatreon's first confrontation with Levin came way too soon. From Ellie messing up his leg a little bit, to Levin inflicting minor damage that he failed to notice (setting up his 'inability to feel pain' flaw, though it also made him look like a delusional idiot), to Harker sending him running like a blind, frightened rabbit; never before had a final boss suffered such an ignoble humiliation before the actual final battle. It became less a matter of "How can our heroes defeat such a threat?" and more a matter of "Well, how are they going to outsmart the big, stupid crybaby in the final battle?"

I actually thought Moloch's and his organization were going to become the true final villain(s) after that fight in the Tundra before he got hit with his own villain decay and his whole organization was summarily routed within the span of a single, relatively short arc. The final battle was especially painful, as not only was the Alatreon essentially shat on (four people would have sweeped him had Ellie and Harker not made such rookie mistakes), but the Stygian Zinogre (my favorite subspecies) and the Brachydios (my favorite flagship monster) were also added to the humiliation conga line. The villains truly were the weakest part of this story (though, in all fairness, good villains truly are hard to write, especially when they are technically animals).

- Lack of Characters. Yeah, you read that right. Despite the massive cast, I felt here were too few characters, or, rather, you kept falling back to the same side characters again and again, despite this being a massive world. It didn't help that the only real Lost characters who actually mattered in the long run numbered a mere three (four if you count Nox, but I don't, because half of his chapters have him outright state he is Lost, but then the other half have him acting like one of the locals, including him apparently not getting the Alatreon's message in Loc Lac).

There was an almost appalling lack of presence from the Lost, despite their struggles being an ongoing subplot of the story, and even when they joined forces to fight the Alatreon, they remained faceless masses that were difficult to care about. I don't even count Moloch (the most blatantly evil name I have ever heard since Genoscythe the Eye-Raper), since he was relevant to the main characters for one arc before dying (no, mangling side characters who played no role in the main story doesn't count). Hopefully, that will be rectified in the sequel.

- While I enjoyed many of the Chekov's Guns in the story, I can admit you were a little too liberal with them at times. Just a minor nitpick rather than a real complaint.

- "'Dat Wish Fulfillment At the End, 'Tho". I know you needed Levin alive for the sequel, but that ending was a little too perfect. No good guys we actually gave a damn about died, nor were any of them permanently crippled in a way that ruined their ability to enjoy life. Hell, even Micah was spared and granted a fairytale ending that he frankly did not deserve. I know it's Monster Hunter and anyone who goes to Monster Hunter for grimdark is reading the wrong damn story, but just a bit of real, permanent consequences would have been nice.

All in all, the stories successes outweigh it's shortcomings (despite my complaint list being longer; I'm just a tsundere Devil's Advocate like that). I'm looking forward to starting the sequel, and I wish you lots of success in the future, no matter what you may choose to do!

Not much of a downer. I mean, it was obvious Zhanin lost someone he cared about to one of the Lost the way he carried on. If it was meant to invoke sympathy it kind of fell flat in that regard. I mean, this is a guy who hears about his son dying at the hands of a traumatized madman and decides he is going to do everything he can to wage a campaign of near-genocide (he did say exiled or worse) on the entire cultural sphere said madman belonged to. Pretty much nothing could justify his actions, and most readers could guess as to his motivations, so while it's technically new information, it's still nothing significant despite Zhanin's role as an antagonist (and a minor antagonist at that given the Alatreon and Moloch's organization).

If anything, it felt out of place. Like an attempt to bring down the high of the gang defeating the Rathian (given how powerful this one was I sudden to think what a Pink or Gold Rathian can do), but it was just annoying, rather than foreboding.

Hmm, if I remember the lore of Monster Hunter correct, then your lost have to be even more ancient than the Ancient Civilication. I'm very curious what happened to them and how and why they suddenly appear so many years in their own future.
I imagine the thing with her rage against Monsters will be a bit of a problem for some time... Hey, I just had an Idea: the real kicker would be for her to find a very young Monster (just hatched/been born) after a hunt during which it's mother died (either at the hand of the hunters or another monster) and she wants to keep it because it's cute and would most likely die, which causes everyone to freak out because of the race this little monster is from (Mizutsune, Kirin, Zinogre or something similar which is both beautiful and powerful). In the end she will keep it and bond with it (maybe you could have it see her as it's mother) which will not only give her an awesome companion but also could help her not to paint all monsters with the same brush. What do you think? good idea or not?

So that’s the end of this story. It was quite the ride. So many moments where I was scared of someone dying. So many moments where I was wondering just what was going to happen. So many amazing battles between Hunter and monsters. So many moments where I just laugh. And that ending, you’ve surprised me many times, you’ve almost made me cry. Quite the excellent story you’ve created. Something tells me I’m going to enjoy the stories following this.

Only read the first chapter and already hooked. Absolutely great writing style!

I've read the entire book, and I think you should try to get this published. You made all the characters 3d, having their own reasons for hunting and getting stronger. I thank you for this work, and hope you bring it to a publisher ASAP to show the world your way with words.

balance

now that i think about it id like to see someone with no napance try to stand on a bucking monster and stab it at the same time

Jesus...1.1million words...I'm gonna have a fucking blast