That was good.

I think you are a really good writer but I don't like the idea of finnicks son being 15 years older then katniss's daughter. I think they should only be 1 or 2 years apart. I know in he book Finnicks son is born after the rebellion and Katniss has her first child 15 years after the rebellion but who cares! Other than that it was a really good one shot.

This was a great one-shot!

It's not that I find your writing to be bad, b/c I don't. And there's nothing really wrong with your characters or that Mellark doesn't get why there are vids of her mother wearing the pretty dresses her mother despises. She's an independant person with her own pov. But the lack of understanding does mark her immaturity, and bring to focus the fact that she's a child not old enough to know and/or understand why her mother feels the way she does. She rightly dislikes the way Annie is treated but again, doesn't seem to understand why some might be wary or frightened of a HG "victor" even after all this time.

Though I can understand her saying she's a flawed copy of her mother, she doesn't really seem to have a lot of her father's personality. Rebelliousness is more of a Katniss trait than a Peeta one - even when going against his mother/parents, the one time he did it with the bread, he wasn't attitude-y.

And the idea of a 14 year gap is hard enough - add in the fact that she's 15? That makes me more than a little sick. He's twice her age, and she's not even legal. That isn't "cute" to me. Neither is her killing a bird on accident, then turning to make out with her boyfriend. That's not romantic, and while she probably doesn't have to go without, you'd think her parents would hammer into their kids' heads not to waste food...

I don't say this to be rude. These are my honest thoughts. This story just did not jive with me, and this is why.

This was a great one-shot, but I want more! I have questions that need answers! You write beautifully; I know this story has been closed for more than two years, but I hope you'll consider continuing with the Mellark/Odair love someday.

more more more PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!

i think they have a 10 year gap, maybe 15 was for their son

I think you just stole my fanfic loving soul. Even though the age difference should make we want to say: 29 and 15? No way in hell! Yet, I feel drawn to this pairing like a moth to flame.

They contrast so well. I want to get to know these characters better. Does Mellark (I don't think you gave her a first name) really feel like she doesn't live up to her mother's reputation/expectations? What is her home life like? Is Odair really crazy (I always thought Annie was just a little unhinged because of the trauma of the Hunger Games)? When did they fall in love? Do their parents know they are in love? What's it like from Odair's point of view, to have a mother who's not quite there, be in love with a 15 year old, to never know your father?

I know you said you'd rather leave it as a one-shot but I must say: Please write more!

ps. Is their age based off the books? Are they really that far apart in age?

Simply put, I love this story. A few sentences into the epilogue of Mockingjay, as soon as i realized Katniss had a a daughter, I wanted her to end up with Finnicks son - then I realized there would be about 14 years difference, and my hopes were dashed, but with this it didn't seem in anyway weird.

Odair clearly doesn't ACT like a twenty-nine year old - the way he calls her by her 'Mellark' - a very clever way of not having to reveal their names, BTW - and how he stares when her make-shift dress is blown up show that they are very much on the same page, and you've made their relationship seem incredibly natural.

With less than 100 words you've given an amazingly vivid glimpse into life Mockingjay - just as I imagined it. I simply adore how Katniss's daughter seems to be the complete opposite of her; being a bad archer, liking dresses, just generally being much more open and sweet and loving - again, just how I imagined her. I'm dying to know more, and, yes, this is ABSOLUTELY good enough to be the prologue to a full length story! If you decide to continue, I'll shall be very, VERY happy!

Best wishes,

Cacia

aww! It's a shame she can't shoot as well as Katniss cos having a puurrrfect protagonist is never painful!

I would love you to continue this - usually I'm more of the 'stick to the one-shot' type person, but you write really well! Still, I have no idea where you would go with this :D

(the pairing was really cute, but what do you mean by mentor?)

omg! i love this story so far1 Please write more! I love the almost forbidden love between Finnick's son and Katniss's daughter! Please write more! :)

This was such a great one-shot!

great job! :)

Very cute! Please continue.

Awww. :)

I like how Katniss's daughter knows exactly who she wants and goes after him. XD

hahaha cute

interesting pair