You know Johns character never ceases to amaze me. I love and hate the man in equal measures. For what he did to Dean, for how he tore his childhood completely away from him, but its the love you can still see underneath it all, even if it is misplaced and ill executed. The man did love both his boys, even if he couldn't show it after Mary died. This as always was awesome, I'm always in awe of the world you created from a show that we all love so dearly.

I do love stories that show John's slightly less abrasive side. (:

I liked the ending to Sam and John's scene; it was a nice change to finish on a positive note.

And, of course, the entire scene with John and Caleb was brilliant. Fantastic closing line, as well!

Thanks for the great read!

- Coolest Badguy EVER

It's stories like this that make me wonder what I really think of John and what kind of father he was...

I loved this story, but then again I love all your stories.

I especially like your take on John. So often he is portrayed as simply a singled minded, hard-hearted bastard, so really doesnt care about his family. You always show not only the hard but the soft, mostly hidden, side of him.

I always love your scenes with John and Caleb, neither one of them is ever willing to give an inch, but their true feelings for each other are never far below the surface.

I always wanted to read a story about Caleb and Deans first hunt were Dean was hurt, knowing that no matter the circumstance Caleb would blame himself. How hard it would be for him to accept Deans transition from being his "little brother" to a fellow hunter. "In my mind a part of him will always be that five year old little kid."

"Can I at least wait until he's conscious and on the mend? Maybe cut him some slack until he's weaned off the pain killers?"

"I've found kicking a guy when he's down leaves more of a lasting impression." John grinned at Caleb. "But each warrior has to find his own strategy."

"Chivalry is really is lost on you, Johnny."

John laughed. "Ain't that the fucking truth."

Those last lines are classic John and Caleb.

I loved the story! I think you did a fantastic job of showing what a tough position Caleb was put in. To protect the boys at all costs and to let them go at the same time. Loved it!

Hey!

Sorry it took me so long to get to this. As usual over the past 12 months life has been insane.

There was so much about this that made me smile and some of it made me laugh knowingly out loud.

The banter was fantastic even when it was antagonistic and John's inner dialogue was fantastic! I really, really enjoyed this.

It was a refreshing surprise to find that Sam had also been in on the “having it out at Caleb” thing and actually acknowledged it. It was nice to see both Sam and John come to come peace before he left to talk to Caleb.

These moments between Caleb and John I like. They are both stubborn bastards but seem to have a rhythm with each other that mends itself … most of the time … in the end.

Well done :) Made me smile :)

Tara x0x

This was great! I've missed reading your and Tidia's Brotherhood stories! :)

Great job with the story! I really enjoyed reading it!

*jumps happily up and down* You're back! You wouldn't believe me how happy I was to see the alert in my email. My withdrawal finally comes to an end. :)

This was amazing. And it was really interesting to read everything from John's POV. You're doing a wonderful job in describing John. Especially with all the layers the man has. And I'm glad you showing all these layers. Most people think that John's just an ass who doesn't give a damn about his kids. That he has his reasons to act like he does is lost to most of them.

I really love John's and Caleb's 'talks'. They both hate chick flick and all this 'talking-about-your-feelings-stuff' but in the end they both need it too. :) Especially Caleb who's struggling to let Dean grow up. (Which I can totally understand btw)

And hurt!Dean is always awesome! ;)

Amazing work, hon! And I'm so glad you posted something new! Hope there is more soon! Can't wait! (I'm still on withdrawal here!)

Mary

That is one of my favorite Bible verses! :)

This was great! Got me some hurt!Dean and some angry!/angsty!John,Sam&Caleb. *sighs happily*

Tough situation here. Could have caused a problem between Mac and John, too. I admire John's ability to eat crow without seeming to eat crow with Caleb. Smoothing things over with him will, by extension make it okay with Mac.

Mac's gaze and the injured Dean, who he loved like his own son, was very touching.

Really loved this! Good to see you! :)

Brilliant! Absolute brilliant! Your writing always evokes more emotion from me than anyone else, I wanted to shake Sam there at the beginning right along with John [it's nice to see his perspective, I've always agreed with your insights into John's character] Also felt all warm when he and Sam mended fences. This was beautifully done!

I'm not caught up on season 5 of the show, so I haven't read your plot connected works yet. But I'm looking forward to them, this au meshes perfectly for me with the show and only improves it.

Thanks!

I loved the imagery in this. I loved how you descripe John as a defender, which is funny for me because I try not to romantisize John too much. But I think that people do have certain traights that define them in life, defender is pretty good for John. From the football field to the Marines, his family to the Brotherhood. The problem with this, as far as the boys go, is that Sam and Dean needed other things from their father just as much, and John was blind to that.

I also loved how you descriped the farm as a safe port in a storm and that the Winchester tended to blow in like a hurricane. I bet that was especially true when Sam was in his teenage years, as he is in this story. Nothing subtle about the Winchesters. When they're mad, you know it. When they think you failed them (right or wrong),as in the case of Dean getting hurt, they let you know it, as Caleb found out here.

It is a tough calling, the Brotherhood, and there are some tough lessons to learn. For both student and teacher.

Thanks for sharing. I's glad this didn't end up in the trash.

Anne

Yes; I’ve been waiting for another story! You really delivered this one. First off, it was very fitting of John’s view of his life as a battle; a perfect metaphor, depicting even a conversation with his son as a warfront confrontation. Getting into John’s head was enlightening, and makes the motivation behind what he does a lot clearer. You had some great lines in this one as well. I thought it so sweet John admits Caleb is the man for the job, the full embodiment of a knight. Their relationship is fantastically molded.

I laughed at this paragraph: “Jim's kindly suggestions were often poorly veiled commands. John wasn't sure why he bothered with pretense. Maybe he thought it the Christian thing to do, or maybe it was just more fun bossing people around with a smile on your face.” It is true Jim has his own, subtle agenda, but I just love John’s twisted internal monologue.

And this was particularly deep: “Using a sword or a gun was a skill that could be taught with repetition and practice. Instincts could be honed, rough edges polished through discipline and drills. Some facets of forging a good soldier were harder, requiring a heavier hand, a more calculating design. Kid gloves didn't cut it. John was guilty of using his own sons as props in that valuable lesson, but he had not been prepared for Caleb to stumble into a teachable moment on his own, or that Dean would become ensnared in the event.”

The closing was genius, as usual. You just brought together what it was all really about. Jobs aside, it all really comes down to family. And having trouble adjusting to being off at college, away from home for the first time, this really seems adaptable for me: part of that love is allowing others to grow, even if hurts them. This story brought me peace. The things you can do with words ceases to amaze me.

this is wonderful Ridley. I understand John more after this fic. And its an interesting dilema - how does Caleb move from protector to letting Dean stand on his own 2 feet?

And yes how will Dean do it later.

Very well thought out, And lovely prose throughout.

I actually find myself wondering how the next triad will also handle this. They have been raised so differently. I think you touched on this theme in the story where JT was hurt on their first unofficial hunt - at least in relation to how Dean and Sam and Caleb had protected them. THis tale has me wondering how the next gen triad would handle it among themselves. And there i go again - thanking you for one story while begging for another lol! Thats what you get for crating such a rich tapestry!

Great story.

Wow, those men can be so stubborn. Must be a quality or more a needed requirement to be part of the Brotherhood.

It was weird to hear about and see Dean but not "seeing" him awake and talking, something was missing. Sorry, I'm an extreme Dean Girl sometimes. But we got some hurt Dean so I'm happy. :)