Doctor, doctor give me the news, I've got a bad case of lovin' you.

I love PhantomxPaulina. I duno why. I just really do.

good story but it has a fuw problumes well the wording is not the best. but the idea is good. i think you could used better words like buttiful and lovily, and fantastic. you did a good job painting an image in are minds but i dont feel like you put your self in to this story. i know its a small story but still. and i think you could of thrown a twist in like for example you could of put danielle in there (danielle dannys clone) and made paulina think they were dateing untell she finds out there cousins. remember this is just an example. you wont to add twists in to a story to make it more likeable. and change things like another example: you could change what you call danny every other time like you can call him ghost boy, the young halfa, are hero, everyones faviret c averige teen. you know add different things. a thing i REALLY like is that you did a thing on paulina going all mary suw on us. i just dident feel like paulina at first i thought you were the one talking not paulina. still its a good story and i love love the mary suw paulina. lol. well by

Oh, wow, Paulina is so infatuated and in love with Phantom it's not even funny. :) It's ... cute. You really captured her personality and made me want to like her. She's obsessive and perfect and imperfect all at the same time. It's awesome how you pulled that off.

GREAT characterization of Paulina. She really shown through your words and came to life in my mind. That was brilliant. :) It was just fabulous.

For a small critique, I'd love to see you do a bit more dialog - speaking parts. Dialog tends to move the story along and keep it flowing.

Absolutely fabulous job, Pii. I can't wait to read more from you! You're getting better with every story you write.

-Cori

I applaud the grammar. It was completely unnoticeable this time :D. I may be against PaulinaxDanny but it was so CUTE X3

So sweet I like it. I didn't see any grammar problems.

*sigh* now you've made me sympathize with Paulina... D:

~FoG

Aw, how sweet!

This is really sweet!