Ha! Yeah, his use of the mob boss in that episode was pretty ballsy. Santa Lucia! Great job!

Thanks for the read seems a little cliffy but thanks again

ok, the dialogue is beautiful. I love it.
What i have a bit of trouble with is if this is meant as a script or a novell approach to the characters,
and that maybe completely due to my ignorance.
If it is a script, i think it will be incredible difficult to show anybodies inner Monologue,
ecxept with the dreaded voiceover tool, bane of all well told stories.

If this is a approach to a novell, i have trouble picturing the characters, some description
of the physical characteristics would help me, to see the characters with my minds eye
(bushy eyebrows, a scar here and there). The mere mention of a groundskeeper character leads me
straight to Willy of the Simpsons, but that maybe only me...

one more point, and i am perfectly aware that i may be completely speak out of my ass here,
a clinical description, of the shape and depth of a particular wound, inflicted on Jane, may actually
cause the highly priced, tingly-goosebump effect of a horror(-related) Story.
the type of pain felt (burning, tearing,...) by jane may help there too.

Patrick Jane is probably one of the most difficult characters to write about/for.
To describe a master of manipulation, you probably need to have this element in you to
certain degree yourself. This master of masks, frying in his own personal hell,
distracting himself with mindgames... a real challenge...cudos for trying and eventually
mastering it. I think this whole text is working towards an unmasking of Jane...
again cudos, i would not dare to attempt it. Because, who the fuck is Jane after all...?

i will probably attempt to revise this review, as soon as i find out where i erred...

Poor Jane. Its so crazy and i love it.

Brillant if (sadly) short story! I loved it! One of the first stories I ever read on here was about Arlov getting revenge for the stolen painting, and I wondered if there were any about Santino deciding to make Jane pay for his arrogance :) I found it and it's brilliant!

I loved it, the little moments with Jane's thoughts, remembering his family and all that he lost really tugged at my heart. Plus, I'm a twisted enough individual to like my favorite characters in pain, LOL

And I have to agree with you there... Simon Baker is VERY distracting :) And Jane is such a fascinating, interesting character full of dark self-hatred masked with arrogance and humor. You captured it well in this story, by the way. Lovely work!

Found this on someone's favourites and decided to read. Liked it- well-written and in character. Thanks.

I agree he is an interesting and darkly complex character. I also agree that at first Simon Baker's devastating charm and good looks were quite a distraction at first, but it soon lent itself to adding to the depth of the character. I really enjoyed this fic and am looking foward to reading the sequel. Great work!

I read the story straight through, but I

found myself wanting more information; like

do they arrest the guy and was Jane talking to his wife or Lisbon at the end, when he said my love?

It was really good :)

Really great! You really captured Jane's character. Awesome story! I didn't want it to end!

I'm glad PJ found the strength to continue on and find help, but I'm sad your story's already over. However, I see you have another story that looks like a sequel, so I'm off to read that one now!

Why did you end the story?

It was very nice work!

At next time so.

Hi - just checking you have posted chapter 5 because it doesn't seem to have loaded.

this was great. I wouldn't mind if you dragged out the story more. How bad are his shoulder's where he got stabbed. Like to see him limp back into CBI and make it back to his couch. Then you know he has recovered. But if you want to end it here that is your choice. It does have some closure and Lisbon is at his bedside. She could have some more personal angst over his physical state. Overall an excellent piece. I am sorry to see it finished. Can't wait to read you other stuff. Thanks so much for sharing your work. Love it want more of it

Great that Lisbon was with him in the last scene. I am sad that it's over, but looking forward to more from you!

totally fantastic, you are there with Jane. The pain, the anguish. really enjoying this. Keep it up.